Eating under 1200 calories

CityOnAHill

First time I say something. Second or maybe third time I say something again. After that, I delete them.

I recognize that everyone is different and going about this their own way but there are limits to my acceptance. If I don't feel like I can support you I don't see a reason for us to be "friends".

Yet again ... reasons I love ya! I agree with you and I have deleted people who insist on recurrent unhealthy habits. I am not perfect by any sort, but I think we should be encouraging healthy behaviors. I also cannot say "good job" to someone who is eating 700 calories either.

I love the preaching and the judgement! That's exactly what I come here for!

I don't suppose it's ever occured to you that someone's doctor may have told them to be at a certain calorie level and that's what they are trying to hit? My doctor has told me that as long as I net at least 700 calories, it's fine. Obviously I strive to be closer to the 1200 that is outlined by MFP. But MFP is not the be all and end all of fitness and health advice!

Just a thought or two from the peanut gallery...

Hmm as a healthcare provider myself I would question whether that is medically safe. Sure you may lose weight, but will you be able to keep it off. Why not do it the healthy way. I know that medically supervised low calorie diets are out there ... but very few patients actually keep the weight off.
Please remember that just because a doctor recommends it, doesn't always mean that its right. Doctors generally have very little training in diet, exercise, and nutrition.

I'm not trying to stay at 700 calories. I was simply trying to convey that being under 1200 calories is not encessarily unhealthy. Further, my docotor specialized in nutrition so I trust her judgement. She wasn't suggesting that I only eat 700 calories; the discussion was about not being able to hit 1200 calories and coming in closer to 850-1050 on a daily basis.

I'm not on a VLCD; not by a long shot. A lot of people, like me, have a hard time eating all of that healthy food. I could easily consume 1200 calories going to McDonald's; but that's not the goal is it? The goal is to eat healthier options.

My concern was for the judgement. The OP canot know the story and the plight of everyone on this site. And deleting someone because of their food diary is silly; deleting someone because they aren't supportive or worse yet are sabatoging you, that makes sense.

Again, just a part of the peanut gallary here...

cramernh

First time I say something. Second or maybe third time I say something again. After that, I delete them.

I recognize that everyone is different and going about this their own way but there are limits to my acceptance. If I don't feel like I can support you I don't see a reason for us to be "friends".

Yet again ... reasons I love ya! I agree with you and I have deleted people who insist on recurrent unhealthy habits. I am not perfect by any sort, but I think we should be encouraging healthy behaviors. I also cannot say "good job" to someone who is eating 700 calories either.

I love the preaching and the judgement! That's exactly what I come here for!

I don't suppose it's ever occured to you that someone's doctor may have told them to be at a certain calorie level and that's what they are trying to hit? My doctor has told me that as long as I net at least 700 calories, it's fine. Obviously I strive to be closer to the 1200 that is outlined by MFP. But MFP is not the be all and end all of fitness and health advice!

Just a thought or two from the peanut gallery...

Hmm as a healthcare provider myself I would question whether that is medically safe. Sure you may lose weight, but will you be able to keep it off. Why not do it the healthy way. I know that medically supervised low calorie diets are out there ... but very few patients actually keep the weight off.
Please remember that just because a doctor recommends it, doesn't always mean that its right. Doctors generally have very little training in diet, exercise, and nutrition.

I'm not trying to stay at 700 calories. I was simply trying to convey that being under 1200 calories is not encessarily unhealthy. Further, my docotor specialized in nutrition so I trust her judgement. She wasn't suggesting that I only eat 700 calories; the discussion was about not being able to hit 1200 calories and coming in closer to 850-1050 on a daily basis.

I'm not on a VLCD; not by a long shot. A lot of people, like me, have a hard time eating all of that healthy food. I could easily consume 1200 calories going to McDonald's; but that's not the goal is it? The goal is to eat healthier options.

My concern was for the judgement. The OP canot know the story and the plight of everyone on this site. And deleting someone because of their food diary is silly; deleting someone because they aren't supportive or worse yet are sabatoging you, that makes sense.

Again, just a part of the peanut gallary here...

This and other related posts are EXACTLY what I was talking about... life gets in the way, everyone is different than other people... why make the unnecessary assumption?

Sweetpeach - my Endo also has a nutritional background that has helped many patients even get out of needing a surgical intervention - I absolutely love her and trust her judgement - she wasnt even phased when I reported in my recent 5# loss - 13.4lbs gone in five weeks - and she knows everything I have consumed - even the low calorie days, and understands what I do for a living is actually HELPING!

***Sits on the no-assumption bench with Sweetpeach

seventwenty

What is a good number for a mid 20s male? I have my weight loss goal set at 2lbs/wk. I feel if I did less aggressive goal, I would not take weight loss seriously. My caloric allowance is 1340 calories/day, and my average intake is 1,600-1,700 calories/day, and I bike daily, with an average bike ride being around 500 calories. A few more vitals to paint the picture: I am a short guy, 5'7'', weigh around 170, have a medium build and not trying to bulk up so much as lean and tone (trying to lose the college beer drinking memories). My calories, looking at the last few weekly reports, appear to be a bit higher on carbs (57-58%), a bit lower on fat (28-29%), and a bit lower on protein (13-14%).

thenewme1972

I have not been able to read everyone's replies, so I hope I'm not repeating anyone's comments. But, I am post gastric bypass (GB). I've already lost 117 lbs. I need to lose another 117 (or so pounds) to get to my goal weight. Instead of Weight Watchers, my surgeon's office suggested I use this site to monitor my caloric, protein, excercise, etc. intake. GB folks are supposed to take many vitamins and supplements to make sure their body is getting enough of the essentials. Because their new tummies are smaller, the intake will be smaller and sometimes not what the normal tummy can take in. Maybe some people are post GB surgery as well, are taking supplements, or just have really GREAT will power and can do less calories. Or, perhaps they're eating 2,000 calories a day and exercising alot. :flowerforyou:

herstrawberri

I totally agree with the 'no assumptions people'. This site is supposed to be for encouragement and support NOT for judgement. I have a terrible time with my food. Some days I barely make 900 cals, while others I eat over 1200. I think everyone is different. While I'm sure some DO starve themselves for the weight loss, i think others, like myself, are dealing with outside factors. I'm taking care of a sick father, full time student, and dealing with my own issues with food. You NEVER know what someone is going through or dealing with and should NOT judge them. I struggle every day to just remember to eat. Weight loss is a journey, an evolution, and you learn along the way. I will learn how to juggle all my crap and get my cals back up there but in the meantime, i would HOPE the people who are my 'friends' would support me. All someone can do is try. And if I have to try every day until i get it right, FOR ME, I will. No one is perfect or has the magic cure for weight loss. I'm sure there is something in all of your lives that you do that might not be the best for you, how would you like it if someone judged you for that?????

tigersword

I totally agree with the 'no assumptions people'. This site is supposed to be for encouragement and support NOT for judgement. I have a terrible time with my food. Some days I barely make 900 cals, while others I eat over 1200. I think everyone is different. While I'm sure some DO starve themselves for the weight loss, i think others, like myself, are dealing with outside factors. I'm taking care of a sick father, full time student, and dealing with my own issues with food. You NEVER know what someone is going through or dealing with and should NOT judge them. I struggle every day to just remember to eat. Weight loss is a journey, an evolution, and you learn along the way. I will learn how to juggle all my crap and get my cals back up there but in the meantime, i would HOPE the people who are my 'friends' would support me. All someone can do is try. And if I have to try every day until i get it right, FOR ME, I will. No one is perfect or has the magic cure for weight loss. I'm sure there is something in all of your lives that you do that might not be the best for you, how would you like it if someone judged you for that?????

You say you're struggling to get your calories up, and you know you don't eat enough, so what's more supportive? Somebody who points out that your calories are too low and tries to help you find ways to get them up? Or someone who just blindly praises you for eating too little because you have other things on your mind? If you keep rationalizing why you can't do something, you'll never succeed.

herstrawberri

I totally agree with the 'no assumptions people'. This site is supposed to be for encouragement and support NOT for judgement. I have a terrible time with my food. Some days I barely make 900 cals, while others I eat over 1200. I think everyone is different. While I'm sure some DO starve themselves for the weight loss, i think others, like myself, are dealing with outside factors. I'm taking care of a sick father, full time student, and dealing with my own issues with food. You NEVER know what someone is going through or dealing with and should NOT judge them. I struggle every day to just remember to eat. Weight loss is a journey, an evolution, and you learn along the way. I will learn how to juggle all my crap and get my cals back up there but in the meantime, i would HOPE the people who are my 'friends' would support me. All someone can do is try. And if I have to try every day until i get it right, FOR ME, I will. No one is perfect or has the magic cure for weight loss. I'm sure there is something in all of your lives that you do that might not be the best for you, how would you like it if someone judged you for that?????

You say you're struggling to get your calories up, and you know you don't eat enough, so what's more supportive? Somebody who points out that your calories are too low and tries to help you find ways to get them up? Or someone who just blindly praises you for eating too little because you have other things on your mind? If you keep rationalizing why you can't do something, you'll never succeed.

Actually, I AM succeeding. I have lost over 85 lbs. I have also overcome severe depression and anxiety. I'm ALSO overcoming a severe eating disorder. SO. PLEASE ask me again if I'm trying to succeed? THIS is exactly what is wrong with this post. You jump to conclusions, automatically assuming I'm FAILING because I'm not eating enough. AND, the people in this post are talking about deleting buddies because they aren't eating enough without even considering the underlying issues. NOT trying to encourage or help them. That was also my point. Pointing fingers and persecuting people is NOT the answer. I'm not rationalizing. It's my reality. Do YOU have all the answers? Is YOUR life perfect and you know how to deal with every little thing that comes up to where you are not stressed out at all? Because if you are, please enlighten me.

DottieNewton

Well I am just starting here-4th day--and I find it difficult to eat those 1200 calories--because I am eating protein, raw fruits and veggies, and whole grain low-cal bread. Yesterday, I did eat over 1200 but still under with my exercise. I agree with I am not going to overeat--that is how I have gotten to this point of being 100lbs overweight. and I too need to break that habit. Before, when on diets i still stuffed but with healthy food. Never breaking the habit. So, I also am going to eat when I am hungry and if not I am not going to eat. It is not a mental desire--but, rather a physical need I wish to meet.

I fully understand a person having a starving mentality---there is a vast differnce between eating when hungry and staring yourself.

tigersword

I totally agree with the 'no assumptions people'. This site is supposed to be for encouragement and support NOT for judgement. I have a terrible time with my food. Some days I barely make 900 cals, while others I eat over 1200. I think everyone is different. While I'm sure some DO starve themselves for the weight loss, i think others, like myself, are dealing with outside factors. I'm taking care of a sick father, full time student, and dealing with my own issues with food. You NEVER know what someone is going through or dealing with and should NOT judge them. I struggle every day to just remember to eat. Weight loss is a journey, an evolution, and you learn along the way. I will learn how to juggle all my crap and get my cals back up there but in the meantime, i would HOPE the people who are my 'friends' would support me. All someone can do is try. And if I have to try every day until i get it right, FOR ME, I will. No one is perfect or has the magic cure for weight loss. I'm sure there is something in all of your lives that you do that might not be the best for you, how would you like it if someone judged you for that?????

You say you're struggling to get your calories up, and you know you don't eat enough, so what's more supportive? Somebody who points out that your calories are too low and tries to help you find ways to get them up? Or someone who just blindly praises you for eating too little because you have other things on your mind? If you keep rationalizing why you can't do something, you'll never succeed.

Actually, I AM succeeding. I have lost over 85 lbs. I have also overcome severe depression and anxiety. I'm ALSO overcoming a severe eating disorder. SO. PLEASE ask me again if I'm trying to succeed? THIS is exactly what is wrong with this post. You jump to conclusions, automatically assuming I'm FAILING because I'm not eating enough. AND, the people in this post are talking about deleting buddies because they aren't eating enough without even considering the underlying issues. NOT trying to encourage or help them. That was also my point. Pointing fingers and persecuting people is NOT the answer. I'm not rationalizing. It's my reality. Do YOU have all the answers? Is YOUR life perfect and you know how to deal with every little thing that comes up to where you are not stressed out at all? Because if you are, please enlighten me.

Who said anything about you failing? I asked a simple question, would you rather have someone blindly praise you? Or try and help you reach your ultimate goal you've set for yourself? You didn't answer my question at all, you just immediately jumped to a conclusion about what I was talking about, which is nowhere near what I asked. Kind of ironic, really.

I don't know everything, I don't pretend to know everything. I have friends who comment, good, bad, or indifferent, and I learn from what everyone has to say. Support isn't just telling people blindly "YAY GOOD JOB!" Support is helping people improve and get better. You say you're recovering from an ED, does that mean people who know you and are friends with you shouldn't criticize or get concerned when you don't eat enough calories? If anything they should speak up more, out of a potential concern for your well being and the always there potential for relapse.

herstrawberri

Obviously someone giving POSITVE feedback is better them someone praising something that is unhealthy. I get positive feedback on my food journal all the time. You can be concerned and try to help and be positive at the same time. This is supposed to be a helpful site, not a site that judges people before they know exactly what is going on. While we will prob never truly know what is going on with people so I try my hardest not to judge anyone. People talking about deleting their buddies simply because they don't eat enough really upset me. Because what if that ONE person you deleted really needed support and guidance to eating better? That is all i was trying to say. I'm sensitive about this subject because I get crap all the time. But no one knows how hard i try every day. all they see is my food being under 1200. Rationalizing my current situation helps ME because I KNOW what issues I have with food and it helps me deal with them. Maybe it seems like excuses to YOU or someone else, but not to me. When I read your response, all I read was someone basically attacking me for what I said. Maybe that was wrong, but that is how I took it. I appreciate your honesty and maybe I'm just too sensitive about this subject.

FairyMiss

i am one that often does not hit the 1200, usually 800-1100. this is not something that is intended, i just ends out that way.
I low carb and unless i go over on my carbs i have trouble hitting that MagicNumber. And sorry but i am not going to eat something i am not hungry for or don't want just because i am not at the exulted MagicNumber

Arynamber

First of all just to assume they are starving at being unhealthy is sterotyping. You do not know thier situation, so should you be judging them?
For example, I have some health issues.. I work with my doctor FREQUENTLY and he and I devised an eating plan.. most of the time I follow this. In doing so I do go below the "magic" 1200. some of the time. but guess what? My doctor knows about this.. and he said that was ok to do. I show him actually a print out of what I eat. I am not starving myself by any means... I eat when Im hungry and I stop when Im almost full. I am not unhealthy.

cramernh

First of all just to assume they are starving at being unhealthy is sterotyping. You do not know thier situation, so should you be judging them?
For example, I have some health issues.. I work with my doctor FREQUENTLY and he and I devised an eating plan.. most of the time I follow this. In doing so I do go below the "magic" 1200. some of the time. but guess what? My doctor knows about this.. and he said that was ok to do. I show him actually a print out of what I eat. I am not starving myself by any means... I eat when Im hungry and I stop when Im almost full. I am not unhealthy.

SPOT ON! You collaborate with your doctor, just like I do, and everything I post on my intake logs, I print and mail to my Endocrinologist. She has seen the days I have below 1000 calories, but also sees the notes pertaining to why - work has often kept me from being able to eat the last meal, but - the meals I did have were healthy, well balanced, low-carb, well hydrated, and she is a SURGEON - someone who knows what its like when the call-of-duty to your job keeps you from being able to eat a full meal, or any meal at all for that one meal period. And, Im stuck in a kitchen for a living - last night alone, I served up over 150 gourmet pizzas - and thats not including appetizer meals at a very large private university. No break for meals because again, life got in the way and business was screaming for coverage. I have management to thank who knows of my medical conditions and they always ask me how Im doing and if Im ok... THAT is the type of support I love... I would never expect to receive that here because I never want people to ASSUME they know what prohibits me from being able to finish the 1200 minimum. The managers I work with also know that if I feel myself getting dizzy or shaky, they know to send me to break right away. And until that happens, I keep working to meet the demands of the business and serve these students and professors a great meal.

Im not about to delete people just because they ate below that 'magic' 1200 calories because who the hell am I to assume they are eating poorly by choice?!

They could have been too busy to post the rest of their meals..
They could have forgotten the elements of the food they ate...
They could have been stuck in traffic...
They could have been so sick, they decided to sleep in...
They could have been taking care of their own children's needs...

There are too many factors in life for people NOT to post every thing....

one thing is DEFINITELY for sure - you pass judgement on me, YOU are deleted because I wont put up with that....

karinaes

WOW! ...
the person who posted this blog was just voicing her opinion. & i don't believe many doctors/nutritionists will agree that eating (NOT netting) under 1200 calories (almost everyday) is a healthy thing.
she is simply worried as i would be too.

6heatherb6

First of all just to assume they are starving at being unhealthy is sterotyping. You do not know thier situation, so should you be judging them?
For example, I have some health issues.. I work with my doctor FREQUENTLY and he and I devised an eating plan.. most of the time I follow this. In doing so I do go below the "magic" 1200. some of the time. but guess what? My doctor knows about this.. and he said that was ok to do. I show him actually a print out of what I eat. I am not starving myself by any means... I eat when Im hungry and I stop when Im almost full. I am not unhealthy.

:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
DITTO DITTO DITTO...
Don't be too quick to judge...I eat around 900 -1000 calories and am very healthy...actually haven't been so healthy for years!!! The 1200 is just a base...don't delate your friends just because of the amount they eat...look at how healthy they eat...I've seen people on here 'under' there calories' and they have eaten rubbish all day.....that's much more of a concern I think...
All the best

mrshickey

WOW! ...
the person who posted this blog was just voicing her opinion. & i don't believe many doctors/nutritionists will agree that eating (NOT netting) under 1200 calories (almost everyday) is a healthy thing.
she is simply worried as i would be too.

true. however her opinion seemed to be that she would delete people who didnt eat the 'magic number'of calories. some people find that awful and judgemental, as she doesnt know why, eg they could be recommeneded to do this by their dr, or they may be very short and not need the same number of calories as someone else. so rather than finding out, theyd just be deleted.

tbh, if someone deleted me for not eating the amount they think i should id be glad. i made my diary public today but i can see y people wouldnt after reading some peoples opinions.

tigersword

Obviously someone giving POSITVE feedback is better them someone praising something that is unhealthy. I get positive feedback on my food journal all the time. You can be concerned and try to help and be positive at the same time. This is supposed to be a helpful site, not a site that judges people before they know exactly what is going on. While we will prob never truly know what is going on with people so I try my hardest not to judge anyone. People talking about deleting their buddies simply because they don't eat enough really upset me. Because what if that ONE person you deleted really needed support and guidance to eating better? That is all i was trying to say. I'm sensitive about this subject because I get crap all the time. But no one knows how hard i try every day. all they see is my food being under 1200. Rationalizing my current situation helps ME because I KNOW what issues I have with food and it helps me deal with them. Maybe it seems like excuses to YOU or someone else, but not to me. When I read your response, all I read was someone basically attacking me for what I said. Maybe that was wrong, but that is how I took it. I appreciate your honesty and maybe I'm just too sensitive about this subject.

Except nobody said to just delete anybody that doesn't eat enough. They said ask about it, comment on it, and get an explanation or give advice, and if the person ignores you, then delete them.

roxypoptart

wow

Jackie9950

When they log thier calories and push "Complete Entry" it will tell them in bold red letter "YOU ARE EATING TOO FEW CALORIES" and explains that by not eating enough calories you will slow your metabolism down which will make it harder to burn calories because it's burning them at a snails pace. I know I have days when I get busy or I get depressed or just plain lazy and I don't eat my calories and then fear eating them ay night, and I am sure I pay for it, but to consistantly not eat your calories purposely...yes I say be blunt and honest in the friendliest way possible about how negative this will be to thier weight loss and health. You are such a good friend to worry about them!

Jackie9950

I totally agree with the 'no assumptions people'. This site is supposed to be for encouragement and support NOT for judgement. I have a terrible time with my food. Some days I barely make 900 cals, while others I eat over 1200. I think everyone is different. While I'm sure some DO starve themselves for the weight loss, i think others, like myself, are dealing with outside factors. I'm taking care of a sick father, full time student, and dealing with my own issues with food. You NEVER know what someone is going through or dealing with and should NOT judge them. I struggle every day to just remember to eat. Weight loss is a journey, an evolution, and you learn along the way. I will learn how to juggle all my crap and get my cals back up there but in the meantime, i would HOPE the people who are my 'friends' would support me. All someone can do is try. And if I have to try every day until i get it right, FOR ME, I will. No one is perfect or has the magic cure for weight loss. I'm sure there is something in all of your lives that you do that might not be the best for you, how would you like it if someone judged you for that?????

I totally agree this person about how judgemental people can be on this site. I was feeling really good about myself and when I finally got up the nerve to post a topic I was slammed with negative, sarcastic feedback of people making fun of me. I will never ever start another thread. I barely kept myself from crying at all the cruel comments. I ended up asking them to remove the thread out of embarressment. I have never thought about being mean to anyone at this site. I see everyone as my weight loss family I guess I had thought that meant being able to put my thought, no matter how embaressing, on here for feedback was OK, but no no no. That is not for the emotional at heart.

haldeman5

If someone is going to delete you because THEY don't think you eat enough...LET THEM!!!! You don't need them as a friend anyways, find people that will support you:-) On the other side of the debate if you have someone you don't agree with their eating habits and can't be positive and support them then I say yes delete them because you prob won't be a good friend anyways. I personally don't think it's anyones business what I eat or how much! I leave my diary open for 2 reasons, one because it may help people to get ideas on foods to eat and because I am not ashamed of what I eat whether it's under 1200 cals or whether I go over for the day. Losing weight is a process and there are good days and bad days! Constructive criticism is good but we don't need to be judgemental!

emmaleigh47

I have never been mean or rude to anyone on here ....but this thread is killing me here.
I have the right to choose to be around and to be friends with people who are like me and who support my goals. I also would prefer them to have similar goals as well so I can feel safe in supporting their goals. I have the right to choose what I think is a good choice and what I think is a bad choice. I get to know my friends, so that if they had a bad day or bad week I would probably know about it. In the long run I do not believe that VLCD is a good idea and will lead to healthy lifestyle in the future. There is the rare exception, and if that person was my friend I would probably discuss it with them and know their unique situation.

But have I deleted people for following a lifestyle that I did not agree with ... yes I have. Havent you in real life chosen not to be friends with someone who chooses a lifestyle that you dont support? I know we all do... why would it be different online?

I love my MFP friends... I am actually meeting a bunch of them for a trip in a few weeks... I value my MFP friends and try to stay involved in their lives, but at the end of the day if I cannot support you, then I really shouldn't be your friend.

marinewifemeg

So do y'all delete people that consistantly go way over their calories? Just playing devil's advocate.

emmaleigh47

So do y'all delete people that consistantly go way over their calories? Just playing devil's advocate.

Would I delete someone who was over with a reason .... no ... would I delete someone who repeatedly felt the need to be over and talk about it all the time as it was the way to weight gain (opposite of weight loss) then yes I would because their goals and my goals would not be congruent. I have had friends that occasionally had low days and I didnt care... but when people eat VLCD and then flaunt it or make like it is the only way ... then yes I would need to delete.

theroadto100

I don't think it's really anyone else's business, honestly. I mean, I have anorexia, and have to literally force myself to even get above 800 calories a day. And I hate myself for eating that much. The only reason I do it is because I know that if I ever stop this lifestyle and start eating more, I'll put a ton of weight on. Trust me, I'd love to live on 200 calories a day. But I'm trying to get better. I'm doing my best. I know it would just make things worse if people on here were hassling me about what I eat. I'm doing all I can.

theroadto100

ALSO, many people (myself included) find the whole starvation mode thing to be BS. Not everyone agrees with it. Everyone has different opinions Gotta respect those!

emmaleigh47

ALSO, many people (myself included) find the whole starvation mode thing to be BS. Not everyone agrees with it. Everyone has different opinions Gotta respect those!

I'm proud of you for trying overcome your disorder ...
and regarding your above post ... your right I do have to respect your opinion... what I dont have to do is agree with it or support it.

MKPRN

I am one of those people who may only show 800 or 1000 calories a day. The reason I try to stay around that amount is because I do not log every little bite I eat. I may have bites, licks and tastes of things as I am cooking. I might pick up some candies as I walk by the candy dish. I might add sauce or a condiment that I don't know how to count or log. I feel that it is easy for me to eat 200-500 calories just snacking and not logging it. I find that doing my food journal this way makes me feel less trapped by what I can and what I can't eat. I am definately getting the needed calories though.

tigersword

I love the irony in this thread. So many people being incredibly judgemental complaining about someone else being judgemental.

Don't be judgemental, unless of course you disagree, then judge all you want, is not how it works. Yes, you can say, "don't judge people for how they eat, that's terrible!" Of course, by insisting on criticizing how they deal with their own friend list, you're being equally judgemental. You can't have it both ways, you can accept that people have different ideas and opinions, or you can judge people based on your own opinion, but you can't do both at the same time. That whole throwing stones in a glass house mentality.

NostalgicDruid

WOW! ...
the person who posted this blog was just voicing her opinion. & i don't believe many doctors/nutritionists will agree that eating (NOT netting) under 1200 calories (almost everyday) is a healthy thing.
she is simply worried as i would be too.

Worried indeed, and I think those that hopped on the defensive train perhaps mistook my intent. I understand that people have reasons for not eating a healthy amount every day (I am guilty of the same for many of the same reasons others have listed) but that is why I work so hard to get myself to eat more. If anyone noticed, my question was HOW could I show concern without seeming pushy. I genuinely care for these people, and that was why this post was created.

I have never been mean or rude to anyone on here ....but this thread is killing me here.
I have the right to choose to be around and to be friends with people who are like me and who support my goals. I also would prefer them to have similar goals as well so I can feel safe in supporting their goals. I have the right to choose what I think is a good choice and what I think is a bad choice. I get to know my friends, so that if they had a bad day or bad week I would probably know about it. In the long run I do not believe that VLCD is a good idea and will lead to healthy lifestyle in the future. There is the rare exception, and if that person was my friend I would probably discuss it with them and know their unique situation.

But have I deleted people for following a lifestyle that I did not agree with ... yes I have. Havent you in real life chosen not to be friends with someone who chooses a lifestyle that you dont support? I know we all do... why would it be different online?

I love my MFP friends... I am actually meeting a bunch of them for a trip in a few weeks... I value my MFP friends and try to stay involved in their lives, but at the end of the day if I cannot support you, then I really shouldn't be your friend.

Yes, I am considering deleting a few of the people I am friends with, but people assuming I am just going to jab at the delete button because I think they are eating so few calories are being much more judgmental than they assume I am being. The post was about asking for advice on how to work with my friends to get to the root of the problem, but instead of getting actually helpful advice, I was met with rage, lol.