The Hardest Thing

TDGee

What is the hardest thing you've ever had to tell someone? How did you do it, and how did you feel about it?

Contrarian

I had to tell him I was leaving. I dropped hints, at first, to try to make him initiate the conversation, but when it didn't work, I ended up just blurting it out.

I felt awful. I hurt us both and broke two hearts.

Iamfit4life

That I didn't love him anymore, and why.

MrsCon40

I had to tell him I was leaving. I dropped hints, at first, to try to make him initiate the conversation, but when it didn't work, I ended up just blurting it out.

I felt awful. I hurt us both and broke two hearts.

Yep - the "I'm leaving" conversation is the hardest one.

I ended up doing it in the heat of the moment, in anger, although my mind was made up long before. I felt awful because that was admitting the biggest failure of my life and changing my daughter's life forever.

sjtreely

On a personal level, I had to tell my children that their dad and I were going to get a divorce. Although my now ex was present for the conversation he was very quite and said very little. I did it with compassion and assured them we'd still be a family, but it would look different.

On a professional level, I had to exit a student teacher from her student teaching experience. It was horrible. I had a conversation with her university supervisor and we figured out she could take 6 more hours and graduate with a liberal arts degree and that helped a little, but it was still incredibly difficult. I fault the university for allowing her to get as far as student teaching when, after some investigation, there were red flags all over the place. Flat out - I wouldn't have wanted her to be the teacher of my children, so the decision was made.

Angelabec

I have no idea why you would want to know these things, but you asked, so, I had to tell my mum that my sister is dead. I just came out and said it, because really, what else can you say. I felt like ****.

Angelabec

I have no idea why you would want to know these things, but you asked, so, I had to tell my mum that my sister is dead. I just came out and said it, because really, what else can you say. I felt like ****.

MadeOfMagic

Telling my best friend that he is addicted to xanex and alcohol. I explained to him how he was before he started taking all these drugs, and how wonderful and social he used to be; than I compare to how he acts now-failing in school, lost his job and how he can't remember anything the next day after taking xanex (he couldn't remember any conversation we had the night of when he took xanex, it got so bad people started taking advantage of him like borrowing money while he is on it and he would never remember it the next day.

One night my bf and I treated him to bowling and food, the very next he couldn't remember what happened the night before, he lost his $20 and started telling me how he paid for stuff the night at the bowling alley and that I need to pay him back-in reality my bf and I paid for everything for him. He later found that $20 in his jeans and apologized. Him blaming me wasn't a big deal, the fact that he coudn't remember ANYTHING the next day was. That's where I drew the line...what's the point of spending time with someone if they won't remember any of it the next day, like he would tell me the same story 3 days in row, xanex really screwed with him. So told him how it's destroying his life and his relationships. We wanted to start a company together, but I lost all hope as soon as he took these drugs and I couldn't depend on him being responsible.

Hardest part was telling all this truth to my best friend even though it might hurt him a bit now, but it was necessary to be honest.

Luckily he listened and realized he needed help, in fact he returned from rehap late last night and I am going to see him today after work, I am so happy to have my friend back to normal, now there is a chance we can start the company together

Iamfit4life

I had to tell him I was leaving. I dropped hints, at first, to try to make him initiate the conversation, but when it didn't work, I ended up just blurting it out.

I felt awful. I hurt us both and broke two hearts.

Yep - the "I'm leaving" conversation is the hardest one.

I ended up doing it in the heat of the moment, in anger, although my mind was made up long before. I felt awful because that was admitting the biggest failure of my life and changing my daughter's life forever.

I think if it's the woman leaving, she's decieded long before she actually does it.
Not sure about men.

JessiC1984

The hardest thing I ever had to tell anyone, was when my niece passed away suddenle, no one, even the police, could find my father (he's a trucker) I had to go wait by his car for the end of his run and I had to tell him that his granddaughter had passed away. Worst. Conversation. Ever.

Contrarian

OP should answer this, too. :flowerforyou:

BeautifulScarsWECHANGED

"Hardest Thing" *snicker*

Oh come on! You were thinking it too! This is much too easy!
:bigsmile:

Iamfit4life

"Hardest Thing" *snicker*

Oh come on! You were thinking it too! This is much too easy!
:bigsmile:

Not goIng to lie, that was my first thought!!

vaderandbill

Personal: Telling my 4 year old son that daddy was going to be living somewhere else. By far the worst day of my life.

Professional: Had to tell a day student at my residential school that his parents were not going to have him come home anymore and that he'd be staying at the school with us

Britt2Fitjrny

wow everyone had been threw some very tough things. I'm sorry that you sister died. That must have been so horrible.

About the xanex story... I am so happy that it ended well. You were a good friend from the sounds of it and i think that really helped make a difference. I know how that is though. with xanex you have no memory while your on it after you come off it.

Everyone is so strong....

zenchild

One morning my mother-in-law didn't wake up. She had a massive heart attack in her sleep. She was 53. While my husband was with his dad at the hospital I had to go back to the house to make sure his brother was OK. My husband asked me to phone his dad's sisters to let them know what had happened. I had met his aunts only once before. I had to call them, remind them who I was, and tell them their much-loved sister-in-law was dead.

sosayscyndi

Everything everyone said is such a tragedy and you're all so brave for doing so and sharing it here. This is a community of amazing people.


Mine was telling my husband that I lost our baby. We have 3 healthy, great kids now, but even typing it was tough.

TDGee

First of all, I want to apologize if this topic has made you remember things you didn't want to remember. That was not my intent. I posted this topic as a somewhat different type of thread here, something to make one think a little. Again, my apologies.

In response to the request for mine... I have several similar stories.
I have had to tell my children that Mom and Dad still loved them, but wouldn't be living together anymore.
I do not know how many times in my career I have had to tell someone that a loved one has died. Probably the toughest one was having to tell the mother of 4 that two of her children (14 months and 4 years old) did not survive the car accident they had been in. I withheld the information that they may well have survived had they been restrained at the time of the accident. That was over ten years ago. I still remember it vividly. It doesn't get any easier with practice.

Again, sorry if this topic has made you uncomfortable.
:flowerforyou:

Katbaran

Everyone has had such such hard/difficult things to tell others that it makes mine seem pretty small. The hardest thing I ever had to tell someone was telling my parents I had cancer. Luckily, it turned out well after surgery, but it was really hard to see the looks on their faces when I told them.

sarah_ep

That he went to prison (life) for drugging and molesting 16 little boys.

It still sickens me that I knew this person and once considered him a mentor.

lrichardson2360

As a teenager, in a desparate bid for attention, I had to tell my mother in the middle of the night that I had just ingested a bottle of sleeping pills.

However, if that's the hardest thing I've had to talk about, I'll consider myself VERY lucky.

_Timmeh_

I had to call my brothers to tell them our older brother had just died of a massive heart attack. I could barely talk let alone hold the phone. Mom and dad are still alive but my mom was on a cruise with some lady friends and my dad was too distraught to make any more phone calls.