Could use some encouragement

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I have been overweight for as long as I can remember and I am freaking miserable. Within the past 4 years, I have lost a lot of weight (and gained some of it back then lost it again and then gained some of it back) and I have never really been serious about losing weight until recently - it has all been just a "want".

I guess my thing is I haven't been willing to make a lifestyle change, but I am in the right mindset and want to make the lifestyle change. I have met the love of my life and we're planning on getting married in September 2012 following his return from deployment. While he is deployed, I want to shed the "old me" and go into our marriage a new person with a wonderful outlook on life instead of the insecure person I am now.

The hardest part about losing weight for me is the encouragement. A lot of my family thinks I will go back to old habits and then gain all the weight back and their negativity causes me to gain weight every single time.

I guess I just need some encouragement.

Replies

  • RachelSRoach1
    RachelSRoach1 Posts: 435 Member
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    Frankly, you will just have to learn not to rely on your family for the support. Find friends here... or better yet... be a support unto yourself.
  • Michelle_J
    Michelle_J Posts: 362 Member
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    You can do it girl! You have almost a year to get to where you want to be. And you're at the right place for encouragement, motivation & success. Good luck on your journey =]
  • sistergoddess
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    I find that my family feels that if they support me they are saying I'm "fat" and they don't what me to think that they think I have to lose wt. However it is not helpful when you are serious about getting rid of the extra wt. Congrats on the marriage and feel free to friend me!
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
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    You can do it!!! One day at a time. Forgive yourself if you make a mistake and get right back at it the next day.
  • dlongshot7
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    I'm in the same shoes you are girl!! I'm at the heaviest weight I've been in my life and I've met the love of my life and while he is deployed this year I'm doing the same thing you are.. I've realized that the only true support is yourself. What has helped me is to not focus on the results, but the diet and/or excercise. Focus on what will get you the results and the results will come, instead of focusing on the end and beating yourself up if it wasnt enough. You can do this!!! You have the right mind set now, just stay focused on you, and you only.
  • Hey(: my fiancé is just about done with his 9 month deployment and I did the same thing you're doing. A lot of girls do(: you just need to focus on yourself and you can definitely do it. Please feel free to add me(: deployments can be really tough.
  • dolldede
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    My daughter inspired me to start dieting with her weight loss. A tip she gave me (and it has really helped) was to make a list of things I am excited about doing or getting that the weight has prevented (i.e. going parasailing, shopping in the regular sizes at the department stores, etc). Now when I'm feeling discouraged because I'm not losing weight as fast as I'd like, I go online and research things that I'm so excited about doing in the future. Hope that helps.
  • ChokOrange
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    Don't try to achieve too much too fast. Set a short term goal. Find some friends to exercise with, or join a regular class at the gym and introduce yourself to your classmates:wink: . These things have helped me so much. MFP is a great tool to track your progress and keep yourself going. Decide to succeed and do it! You can!
  • rstaylor
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    I feel your pain :S I have done the same thing since 2004, then I had two beautiful little boys and I became less concerned with looking after myself and more concerned with looking after them! Just last year I had lost 16 kilos and I put it all back on with a little extra too...BUT.... as I prepare for my wedding in March next year I've realised I dont want to be this frumpy, moody, overweight woman, I want to be healthy, fit and looking HOT in my dress, lol :) Besides fitting into a killer dress, I remind myself how good I felt when I'd lost the weight, how much more confortable I was in my own skin, how much healthier and full of energy I was!! I remember the compliments I was given by my man, by friends, but most of all how much more fun I had with my boys when I could actually run around with them for longer than 5 minutes without dying from exhaustion.

    Being apart of My Fitness Pal has also been a great motivator, monitoring what it is I'm putting into my body, and also what I get out of my body in terms of my exercise, and what I am capable of achieving with a little bit of effort and encouragement. A girlfriend of mine got me onto it, and she also "Makes" me go jogging/walking with her for an hour, three times a week. Its great because our boys get to have a play, we get to catch up and gossip, and we leave feeling very proud of ourselves!!

    My suggestion?? BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND WHAT YOU CAN ACHIEVE, because you know you CAN do it, take small steps, make small changes, build up to bigger ones, set yourself goals no matter how great or small, and commend yourself on achieving them, OWN THEM....You'll thank yourself for it :) And when you have people doubting you, use that as motivation to prove them wrong, to show them what you are made of!!!!

    Goodluck!!

    PS Feel free to drop me a line, we can share ideas and tips, thats what its all about...Networking, encouraging each other in our common goal to be our BEST selves :)
  • freakingenius
    freakingenius Posts: 40 Member
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    Keep your head up and focus on your goals! You can do this! Set yourself up to succeed, not to fail. Focus on smaller goals that lead you to your bigger goals and don't let one bad day, or bad meal ruin your progress. =)
  • HotCarey
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    Your finance loves you for who you are now.... so you do not need to earn his approval and be a whole new person when u get married, you already have his love and approval! He wants to marry you!!!! YAY!!! ! I was a beefy, muscular girl back in my high school days. I was made fun of a lot. I lost about 25 lbs in college and have kept it off give or take 5 lbs. It will always be a struggle but if i can give you any advice take baby steps. You do not want to do extremes. You are creating a lifestyle not a temporary diet. I just got married sept 24, 2011. I lost weight but after the wedding put it back on... only 5lbs or so but do not do this just for the wedding. Baby steps.... take icecream and cookies out of your food intake for a month. then move to candy..... that's how i did it, after many attemps at dieting. dieting never worked for me. it was too extreme. Learn your body.... I can eat sugar but my body very easily puts weight on with fats. SO i do not eat a lot of red meats, no choco. really nothing fatty. But i do know I can still have sugar, so i have italian ice instead of ice cream. Twizzlers instead of chocolate. but my sister can eat fat but her body cannot do carbs.... you have to learn about your body! Jillian Michaels has a great body test out there. It is in her book making the cut! Take it! you'll learn a lot about the way your personal body handles certain foods!! EXercise! it's only 30 mins a day! walk, bike, swim.... the weather is beautiful this time of year, take your ipod and enjoy the outdoors! you got this girl!!!
  • Kaybee1011
    Kaybee1011 Posts: 21 Member
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    Hi, I am new to this site. I really could use some encouragement. I have a big problem keeping the weight off.
    Thanks guys