I believe in baby steps.

InTenn

It was kind of big deal for me this week. 15 weeks and 24 pound along “the program,” I have lost 10% of my total weight. As someone who really never figured out how to lose weight, that’s a good milestone, one that I will take as an opportunity to tell a story. So if you will indulge me…

Motivation comes from within. Most of us … okay, me at least – have always been motivated to lose weight, but have found it difficult to make the necessary sacrifices. The “silver bullet” that magically killed the fat-monster and will cause pounds and inches to fall off with minimal effort have been sought after, dreamed about, and tried. Yet even when successful, the success is usually short lived or at a very high price.

The bottom line for me is this - baby steps that you take are superior to giant steps that you only think about.

The idea of losing 30 pounds per month (while eating what you want) is appealing, but is the health equivalent of “get-rich-quick” schemes. If it sounds too good to be true…

But the healthy options that I saw have always been to severely limit calories. As much as I like to eat, that wasn’t a sacrifice I was willing to make. The idea of limiting calories to 1200 or 1500 per day to lose two pound per week was just a bridge too far. I wasn’t willing, or really able to do that. And frankly, 3 ½ months into it, I’m still not willing to commit to that. But 1800 calories net? Maybe I could handle that. I could try at least.

When I started logging food and logging exercise on here, targeting losing a pound a week, something interesting happened. I finally had a visible relationship between diet, exercise, and expected weight loss. When I felt like eating more calories than I was allotted, I didn't have to starve or deny myself. I knew I had to go for a long walk or climb the stairs for a few minutes or something. So I did. Then I found that other exercises - going to the gym, biking, playing tennis - burned even more calories. That translated into accelerated weight loss or the option to eat a little differently/more. Or, I could forgo eating the excess calories if I knew I wouldn't be able to work out.

So eating decisions stopped being just about what you "can't have." Instead, it became a choice. Eating a snickers bar became a choice between an hour of walking or bypassing half of a steak. Half portions of my favorite foods (like french fries and some pastas) became a good option. Grilled chicken and salads because a staple, but one I like. No more than a tablespoon of ranch dressing goes on a salad now (because I still can't handle that fat free stuff). And I actually took the bread off of a Wendy's Grilled chicken sandwich when I realized that over half of the calories in the sandwich was in the bread. (That allowed me to eat a half order of fries). But I haven't had a double burger with cheese in a while - A calorie load like that is saved for a high exercise day that ends with a Chinese buffet (staying clear of fried spring rolls).

At the start, I learned to walk for 20 minutes at lunch, or 30 minutes in the evening if that was all the time I had. I learned that paddling a kayak while fishing on the weekends was a good exercise, and something I did occasionally. I increased that while the weather permitted. Going swimming, I made a point to spent a little more time in the water than on the dock. I realized that while waiting for my stepson's ball game to start, I could walk the track. My wife and I looked at things we enjoy that burned calories, and now we bike together, we joined a gym (for when it rains), we play tennis (badly), we paddle the kayaks in season, we might take dance during the winter... it's been good for us health-wise and for our relationship. Meanwhile, she enjoys some exercises more than I do, so she does those when we can't find time together. Similarly, I take time to myself when her schedule keeps her from joining me. Having the love of my life involved in this with me certainly helps the journey.

I guess the lesson for me is that when you track these things together (weight, food, exercise) so you can see the relationship, it is (a) easier to remain motivated to stay on your program, and (b) less restrictive because you see things as choices rather than limits. And as with any process, the more you do it, the more you learn how to do it. Tiny improvements every day, new options, slightly better choices.. they add up over time.

And it is empowering to know that you are doing something to improve yourself, even if the improvement is slow. That's okay. I'm a big believer in baby-step progress in many of life's important aspects.

So for anyone starting or stuck, here’s what worked for me. Pick a shallow weight loss curve and record everything you eat and your exercises. If that doesn't work, modify your diet and exercise. Mine certainly hasn't been quick, but it has been a lot quicker than just being frustrated. Starting is the key - then you have something to adjust from.

Baby steps rule.

glockster972

Well said. One step at a time.

rw4hawks

AWESOME!

1953Judith

The connection between food, weight, exercise has been huge for me as well. I am beginning now to add additional relationships as well -- mood and money being two that come to mind today. My husband hasn't joined me with the exercise component, but we have found a way to create healthy meals as a team -- a huge, huge help.

pholbert

I agree, Well Said. I hope alot of people read this. I really think this could be helpful.

SmartFunGorgeous

I completely agree. I think that is the only way I've managed to stay successful and committed. Thanks for the reminder.

GINAvsGINA

Thanks for sharing your story it's very motivating!

JoanWill

This post should be on the very top list for new member introduction.

Very inspiring, motivating and so true.

thurberj

Great post and so true....I constantly think about what I may want to eat or drink because of a healthy social life and adjust my activity level accordingly. My husband and I often split a meal when going out....not because we are on a fixed income or cheap (we are neither), but because we just don't need large portions anymore and don't like the feeling of being so stuffed that you are uncomfortable. You really hit the nail on the head on all of your points!! Kudo's and continued success!!

mwilke

I love this! I think it is so great that you and your wife are doing things together. That brings up a question for me though. My husband is very limited in the exercise he can do, and when I ask him to go for walks with me, he can barely do that because of the pain. I know that he is extremely frustrated because of his limitations and then eats more. He has been watching me work out (which makes me a little uncomfortable because I don't like the way I look) and I think that is frustrating him that he can't join me. He did take a super huge step last night and tell his parents that he didn't want to take any cake or candy home with us (we went to a cousin's wedding) because we are trying to eat healthier. What can I do to be more supportive of him, and to encourage him more??

Sherry1979

Very well said & thank you for sharing. I feel the same way but at times I'm made to feel guilty (whether intentionally or not) by some people who think if you eat something you actually enjoy you are "cheating". So I'm glad there are others out here that realize this can work for real life!!

Congrats on the choices you have made and the success you have achieved from it!!

P.S. From one Tennessean to another!!

philosohoe

I agree with EVERYTHING that you said. Whether you call them "baby steps" or "mini-goals" the result is the same: rather than focusing on a long term goal that seems like it is too far away to reach, we can focus on smaller, attainable goals that get us that much further along the road. I really love how you and your wife are working as a team to support one another on this journey. I've been lucky enough to have my boyfriend do the same with me, and it definitely makes a tremendous difference to know that you're not alone, and that you have a built-in support network. Congratulations on your success so far, and cheers to all the victories ahead of you! Thank you so much for sharing your story

hatravers

well said i too believe in baby steps

kdw_130

This was an amazing read - your writing in a pleasure to read, and your message very important. Congrats on your successes so far.

TNGirlyGirl

I know it's been a tough journey, and frustrating at times -- but I'm so glad you started taking those baby steps! They've translated into a great loss, and are the first of many more to come!!

I'm proud of all your hard work - you know I'm your biggest fan!! Thanks for being mine

Jenninedinburgh

I love your post! Thank you for sharing with us.

dishonour

Thankyou for posting this. I've been off the wagon lately and feeling all doom and gloom, thinking it's never going to work, why even bother? etc... So reading this has helped. A lot. Back on track as of the morning thanks to yourself making me see sense

Jenninedinburgh

Bump