Person at the gym who looks wayyyy bad.....

porka29

Okay, primarily I would never talk about this and/or bring it up, but the food addiction issue on the other thread for Food and Nutrition made me want to ask all the others' opinion. At my gym there is a person who looks so bad, like not even there but totally giving themself out to the cardio thing that I just chalked it up to a one timer. As the months have progressed, my bf has also noticed this person and asked me if this is what I am hoping to be and/or is this what women think is pretty. To be fair, this is the only forum I feel comfortable to discuss this and/or get advice. Since then we've talked about this quite frequently because I now know that if I am there at the same time, it feels weird and embarassing for me to change around this person, only because they are probably 79 or 80 lbs max, but can do cardio FOREVER!!

So, I hope that I am not offending anyone by talking about this topic, but I feel that she is doing something bad to herself, but it's not my place to say anything. BF says perhaps the gym should say something and if they don't there could be an issue if she passes out while working out.............is this right or wrong?

I have seen her and wonder what the deal is, but not got balls enough to say anything. Not my place, I feel that maybe the gym takes the same stance? Please tell me what you think, I feel creeeped out by not saying anything, but saying something would be weird too, keep my mouth shut and leave it up to the gym or what? Thanks!

porka29

Okay, primarily I would never talk about this and/or bring it up, but the food addiction issue on the other thread for Food and Nutrition made me want to ask all the others' opinion. At my gym there is a person who looks so bad, like not even there but totally giving themself out to the cardio thing that I just chalked it up to a one timer. As the months have progressed, my bf has also noticed this person and asked me if this is what I am hoping to be and/or is this what women think is pretty. To be fair, this is the only forum I feel comfortable to discuss this and/or get advice. Since then we've talked about this quite frequently because I now know that if I am there at the same time, it feels weird and embarassing for me to change around this person, only because they are probably 79 or 80 lbs max, but can do cardio FOREVER!!

So, I hope that I am not offending anyone by talking about this topic, but I feel that she is doing something bad to herself, but it's not my place to say anything. BF says perhaps the gym should say something and if they don't there could be an issue if she passes out while working out.............is this right or wrong?

I have seen her and wonder what the deal is, but not got balls enough to say anything. Not my place, I feel that maybe the gym takes the same stance? Please tell me what you think, I feel creeeped out by not saying anything, but saying something would be weird too, keep my mouth shut and leave it up to the gym or what? Thanks!

cmriverside

I would talk to the gym General Manager. That is wrong to not feel any responsibility for this woman's health at a place meant to promote health.

Phoenixflame

Oh goodness, there's a girl just like that at my gym! I think others just think she's super thin, but I've seen enough anorexic girls to know that this girl has a problem. Her joints have that whole disproportionately-bulgy thing going on, and you can tell her cheekbones aren't meant to be that prominent. Not to mention she wears a tee-shirt WAAAAY too big for her. And yes, she drives away at the elliptical for hours.

But yeah, I've never said anything. The student staff always look uncomfortable around her.

pixiestick

here's a thought: try to get to know her. I mean, when you are in the locker room or in the studio stretching or whatever. I think sometimes when a person is hurting his (her) own body, it's because there are deeper hurts inside. She is probably just as self conscious about the way she looks as anyone with an extra 50-100lbs. It's amazing what a smile and a friendly "How's it going?" will do to a depressed day.

The problem with investing in someone else emotionally is that it is an emotional investment. It takes time but I think it is more rewarding to everyone in the long run.

Syu_N

I agree withg pixiestick, but if things get out of hand then maybe talk to the staff.
Check out the reactions of other people around her before you bring it up with them. My gym had a girl like that, and they made her leave, because she got so thin that she made everyone feel uncomfortable & they were worried about her health. She even worked out in the showers!

Wolfena

My guess is she has an eating disorder and possibly exercise bulimia to boot.... I don't think the gym has the right to say anything because she pays her membership just like everyone else does. They are a business, not a counseling service. There are no "rules" to how much a person is allowed to exercise daily or even monthly - it's not like a bar, where the bar-tender can refuse to serve her because she had enough.

If you are comfortable with it, you can talk to her- but my guess is that she needs a lot more help than a stranger from the gym saying they think she's too thin and may be hurting herself.

Plus there's always the possibility that there is nothing wrong with her, perhaps she's thin for a reason (maybe WAS sick?) and is working out to help herself regain weight (muscle) in a healthy manor - or she's just plain old naturally thin.

TRLTAMPA

I agree with Wolf....to the gym, she's just a $.

SoupNazi

She's an adult and has a right to do whatever she wants to with herself. It's her life, her health and her concern. I don't think anyone would dare walk up to an extremely obese person and call them out in a gym atmosphere and being a total stranger. As a stranger to her, I would say to concern yourself with you unless she specifically came to you for advice or her concerns.

TamTastic

Hmmm, unfortunately I don't think it's your place to do or say anything, simply because you don't know her story.

For example, there is a girl at my gym who I assumed had the same issue. She was super thin, I mean he legs looked like they would snap in two! And she would be on the elliptical, doing her thing at full speed. My friend and I would talk about her.

Then, one day my friend was watching the local news and saw a story about a girl who had her stomach explode or some weird issue and she couldn't eat much and in fact had a "feeding bag" or something, attached to get the nutrients in she needed.......and it was this girl!!!

So, while I am sure that story is rare, you just never know what is going on and I am sure if there is an issue, her friends and family are trying to help her with it.

I can understand your concern though!!

drewzaun

Cardio burns a lot of calories. If someone can do a cardio workout for a long period of time then I doubt very much they have an eating disorder. Perhaps some weird obsession with whatever workout they are doing, but considering all the other addictions out there I think working out is a healthy one.

WillPillageYourVillageForFood

My daughter gets a lot of strange looks at the gym too, she is 5'4" and weighs 87 pounds. She is not bulemic, anorexic, nor does she have any type of eating disorder. She eats everything in sight and plays soccer. It is just as rude to assume that a thin person has a "problem" as it is to point out the obese person. She should not have to feel self conscious while exercising just because she is already thin. Just my feelings on this subject.