The myth that was me

parys1

I am finally seeing the myth that was me. For far too long I have defined myself by the opinions of others (you'll never have slim legs, your butt is too large, you're just a big girl) as well as the self smack-talk I have indulged in over the years (I am just a heavier person, I am destined to be large, I don't deserve to be healthy). I am finally, truly seeing that this is myth. My frame is actually small. It turns out, I come from a long line of petite, curvy women, I have good musculature, I am strong. I am carrying more on my frame that is necessary...for now...this IS changing. I lost 75 lbs a few years ago and was close to what I thought was "it" for me, someone told me that I was starting to look old with a leaner face and that I should stop losing weight. Appallingly, I took this as gospel. This became my truth. So I stopped putting true effort into my health (even though I was into distance running - I've done a few half-marathons) and losing weight - I figured I was pushing it, afraid to imagine that I could be more. I allowed myself to slither down the slope of self pity, both eating mindlessly and with an angry vengefulness. Gaining back 35lbs. Now, after 30 days on mfp, I've lost 8 lbs. It is a start and I am well on my way.

This may not be a success story in the purest, traditional meaning, but for me, it is a success.

My truth is that I am strong. My truth is that I am succeeding. My truth has come out and kicked my myth in the *kitten*.

kathyhull

This is a success story and you've come a long way! I think it's the self smack-talk that's the hardes to over come - sounds like you're doing great!

Mingyming

Thanks for the wonderfull story.

parys1

Thanks