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kerrilucko
kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
in Chit-Chat
I'm really scared. My fiance just quit his job (for good reason but its a really long story) we are moving back home tomorrow... it's a 4 day drive. We don't have much money. We're going to stay with our respective parents until we figure out what to do. I'm really worried, we owe on so many wedding things... I'm scared we'll have to cancel them... or the entire wedding. I hate change, especially sudden change, and this is as sudden as it gets. :cry:
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  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    I'm really scared. My fiance just quit his job (for good reason but its a really long story) we are moving back home tomorrow... it's a 4 day drive. We don't have much money. We're going to stay with our respective parents until we figure out what to do. I'm really worried, we owe on so many wedding things... I'm scared we'll have to cancel them... or the entire wedding. I hate change, especially sudden change, and this is as sudden as it gets. :cry:
  • mandersen16
    mandersen16 Posts: 261
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    Don't get discouraged. Everything happens for a reason. It will all work out I'm sure!! :heart:
  • SherryRH
    SherryRH Posts: 810 Member
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    Was the move planned or due to your fiance quitting his job? Hopefully he will find something soon and you won't have to worry about paying for you wedding. :flowerforyou:
  • Anna_Banana
    Anna_Banana Posts: 2,939 Member
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    that's too bad. You guys should just run away and do a Vegas wedding and save the $$ for a place to live:bigsmile:
  • heal4444
    heal4444 Posts: 709
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    Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. You must feel so sad and scared. Stay strong and treat yourself well. Sleep, eat healthfully, and exercise. It'll get you thru the tough times. Keep us posted of what's happening. Changes are hard. Sudden drastic changes are especially tough. Stay strong. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :heart:
  • MissNova
    MissNova Posts: 563 Member
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    :noway: Sorry to hear that. Just stay focused and motivated that everything will be ok. You faced challenges before and are the person you are now so anything is possible. We all get obstacles we just have to know how to overcome them. Be safe & Good Luck
  • astarte09
    astarte09 Posts: 531 Member
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    that's too bad. You guys should just run away and do a Vegas wedding and save the $$ for a place to live:bigsmile:


    HAHAHA... No I hate vegas weddings! I seriously want to go somewhere else to get married just so I am not forced into a Casino or Golf Course..:laugh:

    Is vegas seriously the only place with drive thru wedding?
  • BEFORE
    BEFORE Posts: 1,291 Member
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    I'm so sorry. Just know things like this will only bring you closer. It will all work out.

    Praying 4 ya.
    :flowerforyou:
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    Thanks guys.

    The move will be because of the quitting. See, we live in a very isolated native reserve community. We moved here so he could teach, and today a fellow teacher ( a local) accused him of a lot of untrue things, strongly implieing that he was racist and unwelcome here. The principal (also a local) was RIGHT there and didn't even try to step in. My guy just sat there are took it. Then handed the principal his keys and walked out. There is a big scuffle going on over at the school right now. They (the other principals and dir. of ed.) are trying to get him to at least finish out the week because then on his reference it will show he gave notice. Apparently they all are having some meeting tonight to discuss this whole thing. I feel sick. I never really felt safe here, we've had windows broken and things but we have never been thretened like this before.
  • SherryRH
    SherryRH Posts: 810 Member
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    Kerri, I feel really bad for you guys. If you don't feel safe in the place you call home and you don't feel like you are welcome then maybe it is time to move on. You weren't planning on having your wedding there were you? If not, then at least you won't have to come back and put up with the crap.
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    no no, this was going to be our last year here. We were going to stay until June (school year ends) and then move home to have the wedding and find jobs. But with teaching he would have been paid over the entire summer, giving us time to find work without really having to worry about money. I am thrilled at the thought of leaving here, both of us hate it here. But the sudden plans are terrifying too. I'm all knotted in my tummy. ugh.
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Change can be very terrifying. But slow down with the panic. Luckily, teachers are very necessary and in demand, and in the meantime you have family to support you.

    The wedding (on my daughter's birthday, btw, YAY!!) is still a long way off. So many changes can happen between now and then. Do not stress today for the wedding tomorrow.

    Be excited. This means getting out of that stinky old place and starting fresh, being with family and finding new jobs. This is exciting. Don't let fear cloud the joy of newness!:flowerforyou:
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    Change can be very terrifying. But slow down with the panic. Luckily, teachers are very necessary and in demand, and in the meantime you have family to support you.

    The wedding (on my daughter's birthday, btw, YAY!!) is still a long way off. So many changes can happen between now and then. Do not stress today for the wedding tomorrow.

    Be excited. This means getting out of that stinky old place and starting fresh, being with family and finding new jobs. This is exciting. Don't let fear cloud the joy of newness!:flowerforyou:


    haha you are right, I am always like this. Like I said, I cant' wait to go home really! Aw, I just talked to my sister, she said if we really need the money she can have me babysit the kids (she gets government funding for babysitters because her son has special needs). I'm like... geez, I'd do that for free. I just think it's so unfair to be treated this way. I wish we were leaving right now but it is looking like he is staying a week to "give them notice" so his reference isn't completely ruined. Thanks guys, appreciate it :flowerforyou:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Okay Kerri.... update?!?!!???
  • chrissyh
    chrissyh Posts: 8,235 Member
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    This could be God's way of making things better in the long run for you!
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    UPDATE:

    I have no idea what to write as an update. the 2 other principals (one of whom is a good friend of ours) convinced Brian to at least give week's notice- for the sake of his reference- if he was going to quit. The 1 principal we are friends with REALLY doesn't want us to leave because brian is genuinely a good teacher and that is really hard to get out here. SO brian agreed to a meeting with the principal's and this other teacher who made the false claims, on Friday. The other teacher wouldn't even come into the office although the principal requested him to TWICE. He just went home. And this was at 2:30pm, the school day ends at 4pm. So then we had to sit on this all friggin weekend. High stress, not knowing wth is going on. So monday, Brian goes to the main principal and tells him he wants a meeting that day, and he also needs a written document that states he was falsely accused of these things by this teacher and that he was proven to have lied. Principal says ok, I'll call you down this afternoon for the meeting.

    4pm comes, Brian goes down, asks when are we having this meeting? Principal says oh, other teacher doesn't want a meeting, he says it's all settled because he has his keys now and everything. Brian gets pissed. Brian asks I told you I wanted a meeting. it's not up to the other teacher, he's the one in the wrong, if I say I want a meeting, we're having a meeting. And then he asks, whats the punishment for telling these lies, for verbally harrassing me in front of you and for disobeying your requests to come to the meeting friday?! and principal says oh... like he hadn't even considered a reprimmand of some kind. Brain repeated that he wanted a letter clearing him of any wrongdoing and left.

    that night, the principal we're friends with (who is fighting like hell for us to stay, lol all weekend he's inviting us over to watch movies and eat wings, lol really laying it on thick, trying to cheer us up) he talks to the other principal and came by to tell us about it. And he said that the other principal is really understanding now that the other teacher needs to be reprimmanded and that Brian has every right to be upset because his name has been slandered and he has a career to worry about and blah blah blah.

    Brian and I talked about it last night. Both of us are ready to go home. but you have to understand that we have nothing to go home to. We have barely anything in the bank right now, about 5000 I think, which is supposed to be mostly wedding money. That's seriously ALL we have. If we stick it out for 5 months, brian gets paid right through til the end of August, if we leave now we leave with what we have and that is all, so it really is a tough decision. I will probably know for certain what is happening tonight after brian is home from work. so stressful :explode:
  • JasiBella
    JasiBella Posts: 1,168
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    I agree with Mandersen... everything happens for a reason. Things will work out.. maybe not the way you want them to, but they will work out. Hang in there honey:flowerforyou:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    In my personal opinion, which takes into account my own background and experiences and not yours so is really pretty worthless, lol --

    I say stay and stick it out. have Brian do what he can to make it through each day. You will be moving far away and starting new lives in a little more than 6 months. Work through this bad situation the best you can. It's short term (in the long run).

    BUT -- always know that you can end it at any time and move home. There is a feasible way out.
  • sarabear
    sarabear Posts: 864
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    Sorry about what you are going through, but read my quote under my ticker, I think about it when I'm faced with something tough
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    In my personal opinion, which takes into account my own background and experiences and not yours so is really pretty worthless, lol --

    I say stay and stick it out. have Brian do what he can to make it through each day. You will be moving far away and starting new lives in a little more than 6 months. Work through this bad situation the best you can. It's short term (in the long run).

    BUT -- always know that you can end it at any time and move home. There is a feasible way out.

    I'm inclined to agree with you, but to be fair, I'm just the stay at home wife. My stress pretty much ends at are we going home or not? Brian is the one that has to deal with these people every day. I pretty much told him last night, if you want this money, don't let anyone force you out. This guy is all talk, and he's now been proven a liar, so anything more that he says is not going to be taken at face value. If you want the money we stay, you teach your students, and don't associated with anyone else at the school. You come home to me, we leave in June. end of story. But I also told him that if he can't do that I completely understand. If he feels like even his own principal doesn't support him or respect him enough to settle this, then maybe the money isn't worth it. He gets SO stressed out over little things, and this is not a little thing. It actually has me worried about his health. He's barely eaten at all in the last few days. Let's just hope it's settled today and we can move on, whether we stay or not.

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