TOTALLY COMMITTED!

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Summarain
Summarain Posts: 145
in Chit-Chat
I AM COMMITTED....1 WEEK....

I am going through this "not feeling loved, appreciated, special thing" in my marraige right now and I have decided to do the following experiment.

1 week of non-stop sex every day for 7 days. This experiment is to see if I can get him to do the things I need without nagging him but speaking in the male species way, which is always SEX.

I will also do 1 week of intense work out and eating extra healthy.

My goals

1. Lose at least 5lbs in this week
2. Gain the romance in my relationship, get the chase back...wrather than the mr. comfortable feel.

OF COURSE I will let you guys know the outcome....in the slight event that I see a change of character in my husband, of course i will keep this on-going (well maybe not all 7 days, a sistah does get tired) and then maybe I will have finally understood (by doing) the real key to a sucessful marraige....ROFL!:drinker: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
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  • Summarain
    Summarain Posts: 145
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    I AM COMMITTED....1 WEEK....

    I am going through this "not feeling loved, appreciated, special thing" in my marraige right now and I have decided to do the following experiment.

    1 week of non-stop sex every day for 7 days. This experiment is to see if I can get him to do the things I need without nagging him but speaking in the male species way, which is always SEX.

    I will also do 1 week of intense work out and eating extra healthy.

    My goals

    1. Lose at least 5lbs in this week
    2. Gain the romance in my relationship, get the chase back...wrather than the mr. comfortable feel.

    OF COURSE I will let you guys know the outcome....in the slight event that I see a change of character in my husband, of course i will keep this on-going (well maybe not all 7 days, a sistah does get tired) and then maybe I will have finally understood (by doing) the real key to a sucessful marraige....ROFL!:drinker: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • thejarviclan
    thejarviclan Posts: 465 Member
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    ROTF! Oh, I wish you luck! (I'm exhausted just thinking about your week!) You MUST let us know how this works out!
  • MissNova
    MissNova Posts: 563 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Let me know how that works out!!!
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
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    Wow... Non-stop sex and an intensive work out?

    You could make it all one and the same!
  • marc4
    marc4 Posts: 79
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    Too Funny.......I definitely don't want my husband to see your post........lol:laugh:

    Can't wait to hear how it goes........if it works I may try it toooooo!

    K
  • WillPillageYourVillageForFood
    WillPillageYourVillageForFood Posts: 777 Member
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    Just my opinion but I think you are using sex for the wrong reasons. My husband and I have sex usually 5-6 times a week and always have for the past 25 years, and there have been many occasions where I have experienced the "not feeling loved and appreciated" thing. We have sex not to get each other to do something the other one wants or to change something that we think the other one is doing wrong, we do it for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it. :bigsmile:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Just my opinion but I think you are using sex for the wrong reasons. My husband and I have sex usually 5-6 times a week and always have for the past 25 years, and there have been many occasions where I have experienced the "not feeling loved and appreciated" thing. We have sex not to get each other to do something the other one wants or to change something that we think the other one is doing wrong, we do it for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it. :bigsmile:

    :noway: You must have A LOT of jewelry! :noway:
  • Summarain
    Summarain Posts: 145
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    Just my opinion but I think you are using sex for the wrong reasons. My husband and I have sex usually 5-6 times a week and always have for the past 25 years, and there have been many occasions where I have experienced the "not feeling loved and appreciated" thing. We have sex not to get each other to do something the other one wants or to change something that we think the other one is doing wrong, we do it for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it. :bigsmile:

    Who says I wont enjoy it?

    I dont think that i'm having sex for the wrong reason's I think its quite the opposite. The way I see it is maybe I've been looking @ the marriage thing in a different way all along. Thinking that nagging and constant "talking" was going to change anything. Men are more physical than verbal so the way I see it is now I am going to speak to him the only way he can understand. Its all about trying to make your relationship work and finding new ways to do it. Its not necessarily that he's doing anything "wrong" its that he doesnt realize nor does he understand what I need from him in the way I want him too....my goal here is to find a way to communicate with my husband before he become's my ex. Nothing wrong with that.

    Oh and by the way, this is coming from you who has sex 5-6 times a week? You think its because you enjoy it, but the truth is you keep enjoying it becuase you see what you get out of it. With women, we are pleased more outside the bedroom than in it, and its quite obvious that you are happy having sex all the time because of what happens outside of the bedroom...you just havent realized it.:huh:
  • WillPillageYourVillageForFood
    WillPillageYourVillageForFood Posts: 777 Member
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    Just my opinion but I think you are using sex for the wrong reasons. My husband and I have sex usually 5-6 times a week and always have for the past 25 years, and there have been many occasions where I have experienced the "not feeling loved and appreciated" thing. We have sex not to get each other to do something the other one wants or to change something that we think the other one is doing wrong, we do it for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it. :bigsmile:

    :noway: You must have A LOT of jewelry! :noway:

    Hehehe.....you are so funny Shannon. Actually I am still wearing my $19.95 Service Merchandise wedding band. :laugh:
  • alisoncarl
    alisoncarl Posts: 89
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    good luck to you.. cant wait to see if it works
  • JenniferMann24
    JenniferMann24 Posts: 293
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    I think thats a really good idea but I also think your using sex for the wrong reason. I know that I use to feel the same way and it had nothing to do with my husband and everything to do with the way I thought about myself. Take some time to love you in that process. It will help.:flowerforyou: pretty lady
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Oh and by the way, this is coming from you who has sex 5-6 times a week? You think its because you enjoy it, but the truth is you keep enjoying it becuase you see what you get out of it. With women, we are pleased more outside the bedroom than in it, and its quite obvious that you are happy having sex all the time because of what happens outside of the bedroom...you just havent realized it.:huh:


    I wouldn't say that is true at all.
    I really, really enjoy sex.
    When I was pregnant especially. MANY times a day.
    While I enjoy feeling appreciated and love, I enjoy the physical act of sex.
    They can go hand in hand, but I think you've got the cart leading the horse, thinking more sex will equal a happier marriage.
    I always found a happier marriage and more attention equalled more sex.
  • cbrooks66
    cbrooks66 Posts: 65 Member
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    Lighten up...
  • Summarain
    Summarain Posts: 145
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    Okay, I see we have some nay-sayers here....

    Please enlighten me on relationships if SEX doesnt haven an impact on how my husband responds to my needs then what does?
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    :heart:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Okay, I see we have some nay-sayers here....

    Please enlighten me on relationships if SEX doesnt haven an impact on how my husband responds to my needs then what does?

    One question -- if his thing fell off, if you had a catastrophic accident and lost the lower half of your body, would your marriage survive without sex?
  • WillPillageYourVillageForFood
    WillPillageYourVillageForFood Posts: 777 Member
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    Oh and by the way, this is coming from you who has sex 5-6 times a week? You think its because you enjoy it, but the truth is you keep enjoying it becuase you see what you get out of it. With women, we are pleased more outside the bedroom than in it, and its quite obvious that you are happy having sex all the time because of what happens outside of the bedroom...you just havent realized it.:huh:


    I wouldn't say that is true at all.
    I really, really enjoy sex.
    When I was pregnant especially. MANY times a day.
    While I enjoy feeling appreciated and love, I enjoy the physical act of sex.
    They can go hand in hand, but I think you've got the cart leading the horse, thinking more sex will equal a happier marriage.
    I always found a happier marriage and more attention equalled more sex.

    I really didn't mean to piss you off, but obviously I have and for that I am sorry. I will make no apologies for enjoying sex with my husband. As for what it gets me is a man that loves me no matter what. I had 3 different types of cancer over a 7 year period and let me tell you the sex was rather limted during some of those years. It's rather hard to enjoy sex while puking from chemo.
  • hmo4
    hmo4 Posts: 1,673 Member
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    Just my opinion but I think you are using sex for the wrong reasons. My husband and I have sex usually 5-6 times a week and always have for the past 25 years, and there have been many occasions where I have experienced the "not feeling loved and appreciated" thing. We have sex not to get each other to do something the other one wants or to change something that we think the other one is doing wrong, we do it for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it. :bigsmile:

    Well you're one of the few lucky ones, cause I'm with Summarin-only prob is I'm too stubborn too succumb to the selfish male species. I'd rather hand him a towel and a girly book. :laugh: jk. Really, I want to hear the outcome. I can predict the outcome actually...here goes.,,,

    1)Years ago I did something similar-and he wanted it MORE than once a day after my secret experiment. (Same thing- did it every night for a week.) Of course he denies it.
    2) he will during that time treat you FANTASTIC-it'll change once you're test is done.
    3) You'll be resentful, because it WILL CONFIRM that yes, men ONLY have that one true thought what love is..and that is sex. And YOU don't love him, unless you "put out".
    4)you may lose some weight, from stress and anger, at what "duty" awaits you..
    5)you will realize that you are in a world like millions of us who deal with nonromantic, delusional men who really deep down only need that one self gratification, and pout when they don't get it.:flowerforyou: :smooched:

    Have fun. Hope you lose some weight, and feel better about yourself. I think you're awesome!
  • Cyndi1
    Cyndi1 Posts: 484 Member
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    I totally agree with what you said- the way to get to a man is sex....I remember having this conversation with my husband..as long as he was getting it, he didn't care how I spent our money- lucky for him I am cheap and hate to spend money. I love when my husband fixes thing around the house, then I feel like spoiling him with sex , guess what he loves it too. Good luck with your new adventure-lol Let us know how it goes.
  • Summarain
    Summarain Posts: 145
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    Okay, I see we have some nay-sayers here....

    Please enlighten me on relationships if SEX doesnt haven an impact on how my husband responds to my needs then what does?

    One question -- if his thing fell off, if you had a catastrophic accident and lost the lower half of your body, would your marriage survive without sex?

    ROFL THATS FUNNY.....

    Of course my marriage would last. I never said he didnt love me and I didnt love him. I'm just going through a "not feeling loved" period of time in which I feel like I've expressed that to no avail, now I'm choosing to take some action. Simple......its not as deep as some may think. If this doesnt work, I'll find another way. Sex is not the "BEING" of my relationship, its a part of it....but if I can use that as a tool for a more successfull one, why not? He is my husband, not some guy on the street.

    Everyone is different, and different things work for different people. Maybe this will work for us, maybe it wont. I do know one thing though...I will find something that will work.....:glasses:

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