please say i am not the only one

Myth

So besides haveing (pms) (sorry tmi) but my husband and i got in to a discussion yesterday because I told him I have been going crazy, I have gained about 10 pnds back, I can see it in my face and my clothes. I told him no more going out to eat please and no more cooking by him. He cooks great you know one of those people who can throw any thing together and it is great. But he dosnt measure and there is always oils' butters pasta just not good for you stuff. Any way it bugs me that i tried to discuss it with him and all i get is yes I have noticed that you are eating junk all the time or 2 or 3 servings of dinner and I felt like I was being badgered. I wanted to go to him and talk instead I felt like all i got was ya you are wrong bad and blah blah blah. Then we got in to an argument about breakfast cause he had already suggested going out to eat with kids. Which i could have handled and was ready to handle it get 2 pancakes sugar free syrup and be done. He was mad about it and we argued about money. I lost it. I dont have any one to talk to about it who can sympathize with me or understand . He is one of those people who has been and always will be skinny. He said u need a dr no one has been through what you are going through you need a dr! I was pissed. I was haveing a bad day pms'n it and he did not help and made it worse. My issues are with my slef I am not happy about my weight and am scared of getting bigger cause I will lose control agian be fat and depressed again and I do not want to go there. But I am an emotional eater big time. I will eat for any reason Sugar is my down fall! Am I the only one, am I loseing it? Or was it just a bad day?

Shannon

Myth

So besides haveing (pms) (sorry tmi) but my husband and i got in to a discussion yesterday because I told him I have been going crazy, I have gained about 10 pnds back, I can see it in my face and my clothes. I told him no more going out to eat please and no more cooking by him. He cooks great you know one of those people who can throw any thing together and it is great. But he dosnt measure and there is always oils' butters pasta just not good for you stuff. Any way it bugs me that i tried to discuss it with him and all i get is yes I have noticed that you are eating junk all the time or 2 or 3 servings of dinner and I felt like I was being badgered. I wanted to go to him and talk instead I felt like all i got was ya you are wrong bad and blah blah blah. Then we got in to an argument about breakfast cause he had already suggested going out to eat with kids. Which i could have handled and was ready to handle it get 2 pancakes sugar free syrup and be done. He was mad about it and we argued about money. I lost it. I dont have any one to talk to about it who can sympathize with me or understand . He is one of those people who has been and always will be skinny. He said u need a dr no one has been through what you are going through you need a dr! I was pissed. I was haveing a bad day pms'n it and he did not help and made it worse. My issues are with my slef I am not happy about my weight and am scared of getting bigger cause I will lose control agian be fat and depressed again and I do not want to go there. But I am an emotional eater big time. I will eat for any reason Sugar is my down fall! Am I the only one, am I loseing it? Or was it just a bad day?

Shannon

Priscot

Don't be so hard on yourself! Take it one moment at a time. This is NOT easy. If it was then everyone would be buff, fit and healthy. Take a hot bath, do something for yourself ... take a deep breath and tomorrow will be a new day. Hang in there!

MyaPapaya75

I would say your just having a bad day considering you were just debating about the cookies and muffins...maybe just take a hot bath and get some rest...people can be insensitive to weight loss dont let it get to you.

lmr9

No, you're not the only one. Chin up! :flowerforyou:

alf1163

I do have mood swings when I am PMSing and cravings like crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is normal, you are not the only one. No, you are not going crazy!!! You said that you gained 10lbs, in one day? How long it took you to gain it? Do you work outside the home? You said your husband cooks and he does not watch what the ingredients, etc. Maybe you can start cooking the meals or when he cooks try to control the portions and do not go back for seconds. Drink lots of water, continue exercising. Try not to argue much with him about it. Remember you are doing this for yourself primarily so focus on your goals no matter what he says. My husband is pretty much the same and it is funny that I have him now reading labels, he has been exercising everyday since the beginning of the year and has lost about 20 pounds so far. It will eventually sink into him that this is important for you and that you are serious about it. And you have tons of people here that you can vent to and we will encourage each other. :flowerforyou:

Myth

alf no it has been the course of a year that i have gained the 10 back. I just wish he could understand or not treat me like Im stupid. He syas just stop eating. It sounds easy,lol. There was a point where he was trying to do better cooking and getting healthier himself. But now, things have changed,lol. Life stress and buisyness,lol. I wish men were more like women! lol

Shannon

SkinnyMorgan

i'm not loosing weight either!! i thought i was mutated or something! so yeah you're not alone!

snelfk

I have been the same weight, within 2 lbs, since August - talk about frustrating! It hasn't seem to matter what I eat, or how I exercised. Lately, I've let it "convince" me to eat without watching serving amounts, what I'm eating etc. Heck, thinking like it just doesn't matter. Well, it does to me! For me, this is a lifestyle change, so I try to make the best choices everyday. And some days I make choices for the junk food etc,on days, when it's PMS or when life sucks that I just don't want to care about what I eat. I want the comfort. And I'm not about to give those foods completely for the rest of my life. So, if that's the choice you want to make, I say do it, no matter what any one else - even hubby - says.

As for you husbands input, I found that I needed this to be an independent journey from him. When I started a year ago, he decided to loose some wight too. Well, he was down to his goal within 2 months, and now pretty much eats what he wants and stays there. So, I told him, good for you! but, don't criticize me, just compliments thank you.

Anyway, just stick with it and keep on one day at a time...

Myth

thanks everyone It helps to chat with others : )


Shan

Natalievh

if you have female parts you have PMS lol. if you unsatified with things emotions get shaken:explode: :mad: :grumble: :noway: :embarassed: :frown: :ohwell:

MEN!! not all but sometimes they just dont get it, they should be walking around with a " how to relate to your spouse booklet" :laugh: its okay to have a bad day babes, the thing is that that you identifying whats the issues and you know your weakness. so for you babes, remove the sweeties from you as far as u can seeing as you have kids, could be trick) no matter what hubby says, have what suites your diet. stick to your guns dear, he will thank you later. step away or around an argument as that will keep you emotionally stable, address the issue but not causing conflict, you know him best and he sounds like the type that want to know he is incharge, but you are incharge of your well being and no one else. Take care of yu first and everyone else after. Moms happiness = happy children and lover.

so have a bad day and apologise if you have offended or hurt anyone when you feeling better.

Natalievh

i jst so agree and love what you said that THIS IS TRUELY AND INDEPENDANT JOURNEY. thanks to MFP its not a lonely one. thanks that inspired me today. i feel so much better after reading things here today. thanks guys:happy:

CatarinaF

hey, sweetie!!

don't feel like that!!!!
1) no, you're not the only one!! i lost 20 pounds, and i had a boyfriend who actually loved going out for romantic dinners... ouch! really romantic, but soooooo bad for my weight loss. i ended up pilling pounds back. besides, those dinners with all that food made me go back to binge-eating...
and i was devastated. no, wait, the word is D E P R E S S E D. i had to see a doctor and take anti-dep because i felt i had no control whatsoever over myself.

2) so i sat down with him and told him that i wasn't going out for dinner anymore unless i could have a soup and make him not look angry at me. things got better, and eventually he understood. now, you have kids, and routine can be a challenge. you just need to get yourself together and explain him that unfortunately genetics has not been kind to you (nor to me, HAHAHAHA!), and that you simply CAN'T eat like that. so, sweetie, take it easy, breath in breath out, count to 10, and explain him that this is really hurting you, and that u can't eat his wonderful cooking all the time because it's simply too high in calories.

3) ohhhh, and next time he says that you can't lose weight without seeing a doctor, just tell him that most people do lose weight without seeing doctors....!!!!!

4) PMS is screwed... men just don't know... lucky *kitten*!

big hug
:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Natalievh

that was such weet sincere advice.:happy:

Sara31

That is very hard...My husband and I were haing a ery difficult time a while ago. We could never sit down and talk we always got into an argument about our issue ( i know it is not weight loss, but bare with me) My mom gave me some adice about how to approach the mis-communication: When you sit face to face, it start off confrontational, especially with issues with each other, if you go for a walk and talk at the same time, you are both headed the same way to begin with, it's a mental thing. Besides going for a walk is relaxing, and the fresh air and openess of being outside help alot! My husband and I go for walks alot, and we get thing out into the open, and I found it to work really well!! And if you are happier together, it will make weight loss alot easier .
Besides, walking with your hubby will get you outside more and help with losing weight as well!! He can become your support...kill two birds with one stone. I hope this helps somewhat! Keep your head up, you are beasutiful no matter what!:flowerforyou:

Myth

all of these posts tell me I am not alone. Catarina, I am your mirror, kind off. I was depressed for a period of time. I got out of it, and am just scared of going back there. Lost the weight gained some back but dont want to go all the way back. Natalievh, recognizing my weakness is a good thing, u r right. Controlling my self is something I can do, maybe not him but I can control me and some things like arguments. Sara, we used to go for walks alot, but in the winter it is not so fun, lol. Ladies, thanks for all the advice.


Shannon