Sufferers of anxiety...help please!

PeaceLuvVeggies
PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
edited October 5 in Chit-Chat
Hi everyone. I haven't written here in a while, and I'm about to make a huge decision for myself. Therefore, I have decided to resort to who else other than people who go through this every day. Well, a little about me:

My life has been completely ruined by my anxiety, panic attacks and agoraphobia. For the past three months I have been a prisoner in my own home. It began with just a bit of gephyrobia (fear of bridges), but they've escalated to any type of transportation: buses, trains, trolleys, cars. You name it, I'm afraid of it. On September 13th, 2011, I had 8 panic attacks in a day for the first time in my life. It was the scariest day I've ever lived. After that I went to a psychiatrist and they gave me a referral (yes, just a referral) and I made an appointment to be seen. Unfortunately, since I have no medical insurance I was unable to make an appointment because they do not take people who do not have medical insurance. Since then, my mother came from NY to visit me (I live in Philadelphia) to help me get out of my shell. We went to the local mall where I picked up some L-Theanine because according to the guy that worked there, they were very good for anxiety. I pretty much used these as a resort to my anxiety (the most I took was 800mg which according to information is the maximum safe dosage). I used them the first couple of days and then I overcame my fear pretty much, BUT I can only go a certain amount of distance from my house without causing a panic attack. The most recent one was on November 13th when my mom came to visit me, took me to the mall, and on my way back I just had a panic attack out of nowhere. Anyway, this has caused me to not be able to work, not be able to do anything. I have no friends, my family is two and a half hours away, and I'm afraid that my boyfriend - who up until now has been very supportive - will get sick and tired of not being able to do anything with me and will leave me.

So I have taken the final resort. I've decided to go back to New York since I am still under my mother's medical insurance and can see a psychiatrist and get some help. Not only that but I can try and work again to get over my anxiety and my fear. The reason I am writing this is because I am wondering if anyone can help me with some tips, helpful advice on how to remain calm during a two and a half hour drive to New York, and going over a bridge at that (my biggest fear). Look forward to hearing from you all.

Thank you for reading.
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Replies

  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
    bump
  • DakotaKeogh
    DakotaKeogh Posts: 693 Member
    I've faced similar anxieties in the past. I haven't beaten them. But I've learned to hold them down when I need to. It's a long path. You're taking the right steps. Since you're where you are now, is there any way someone from New York can take a train to you and drive you back? You don't want to be half way and just lose it.
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    I've faced similar anxieties in the past. I haven't beaten them. But I've learned to hold them down when I need to. It's a long path. You're taking the right steps. Since you're where you are now, is there any way someone from New York can take a train to you and drive you back? You don't want to be half way and just lose it.

    My mom is coming to Philadelphia to pick me up and take me to New York. I'll be there until I get better and get my life back together.
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
    I wish I could offer advice, but I'm only just starting my treatment for GAD. I hope you get the help you need.
  • NA_Willie
    NA_Willie Posts: 340 Member
    .
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    I wish I could offer advice, but I'm only just starting my treatment for GAD. I hope you get the help you need.

    Thank you Jorra. It means more than you know that there are so many people on my side in this fight :)
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    Well, if your mom is willing and able to drive in the late hours of the night, maybe it would help because there is less visibility and traffic, and you'll be through it a bit quicker?
  • 2live4ever79
    2live4ever79 Posts: 79 Member
    I wish I could offer some advice.. But if it means anything I will keep you in my prayers.. where are you traveling so I will remember you that day?
  • icemaiden17_uk
    icemaiden17_uk Posts: 463 Member
    Bump! Off to bed just now but will try and wright on here tomorrow with things that have worked for me!!
  • TinaDay1114
    TinaDay1114 Posts: 1,328 Member
    I applaud you for taking that hard first step and getting some help -- whether it feels like it right now or not, you're already taking some of your power back by doing something about your situation. GOOD for you. So many who suffer keep suffering alone for a long time. You're already moving in the right direction.

    Our family has a long history of anxiety / depression, but no one admits it. My cousin and I are the first ones to go to therapy and get on medication. It's been a long long road of working slowly through everything, but it is well worth it. I'm WORLDS better today than I was 10 years ago, and I'm actually happy, married, and a mom. I still have some bad days, but they are like everyone else's bad days -- they pass quickly, and I move on. I'm not perfect, but who is...??

    You're brave, even if you don't know it right now. Hang in there. You're already on the right road. There are a lot of people who suffer like you do -- but there are few that are brave enough to admit it and push forward for something better. <<hugs>> your way.
  • kya101
    kya101 Posts: 37
    I hate to suggest "drug" use, but whenever I fly I have to take something to knock me out. I had terrible fears of flying and would get scared at the sight of a plane over head. I had a friend how helped me through it (he is a pilot). He worked with me for years to over come my fear. I still take someting to knock me out on long flights and never, ever do I look out the windows. Just a thought, definitely not a solution.
  • dia77
    dia77 Posts: 410 Member
    I recently watched this movie -" you can heal your life" -by Louise Hay( she has a book with the same name , but watch the movie first). I strongly recomend it .Changed my life
    There is nothing religious in this movie/book. Or not much, anyway. Louise explains a simple way to improve your life. For me , it is working.I suggested to all my friends , but , even if they can see the change in me , they are skeptical, kind of a " yeah , for sure you are doing something else , too" Well , I am not :) Give it a try . It is worth it.
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    I am in tears right now from all the motivating messages I've received. Thank you all so very much. :flowerforyou:
  • i used to get anxiety attacks and panic attacks atleast 2-3 times a day for 3 months. I couldnt leave the house, drive in the car if it was raining/snowing, or if it was too windy because i would have a panic attack, couldnt ride in the car if someone else was driving it was bad. i couldnt be touched, talked to, or even here loud sounds without freaking out. but when i did have them i would try to sleep but locking myself in a dark room and try to breathe in deeply and calm my self down (because it is all in the mind) and try to focus on one thing. whether its the trees ,my kid or anything but i focused on one thing only as much as i could because on top of having those i would think i was having asthma attacks because my heart would race so bad i wouldnt be able to breathe. I found that my ex boyfriend was the cause of my anxiety. We used to fight so much that he caused me to always think horrible stuff all the time, so i finally left him and the panic attacks slowly went away. I still have them every once in a great while when im having an asthma attack or im too stressed out but i just sit there and take deep breaths and concentrate on my breathing and they go away within a few minutes now and not hours. On your way to new york if you have an ipod take it with you and listen to music and close your eyes and just think about the music and not the drive. If you can make it over the bridge without freaking out you can do anything. I have faith in you and i believe you can over come this. its a horrible disorder to have and i hope you have a great trip. Good luck to you
  • Starla_
    Starla_ Posts: 349
    Music is one of my biggest anxiety soothers.

    I recently had to do something which brought me face to face with the causes of all my depression, anxiety etc problems. For the first time in 7 years I had to put myself back there. I broke out in hives in the leadup to this and was an absolute mess with anxiety.

    I carried my music with me, it was a way for me to take my mind instantly somewhere else. Once it was on I could let my mind wander , I could refocus and relax myself. My music made me think about better things, things that made me happy, things that brought light into my world.

    If music is something that can take you places in your mind, make a playlist for the trip. Load it into your phone, ipod, other music player and test it out. Choose music that instantly relaxes you, makes you float.

    I also kept in regular contact with a very close friend who became my biggest support person. Being able to vent when I was freaking instead of bottling it up made things so much easier to handle. Someone telling me when to just stop and breathe.

    You can do it :)
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    I wish I could offer some advice.. But if it means anything I will keep you in my prayers.. where are you traveling so I will remember you that day?

    I will most likely be traveling sometime in January. I'm not sure what day yet, but hopefully by then I'll have been done with all of this mess. New year, new life, new me <3
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    Well, if your mom is willing and able to drive in the late hours of the night, maybe it would help because there is less visibility and traffic, and you'll be through it a bit quicker?

    I will definitely suggest this to her. Thank you.
  • Gee45
    Gee45 Posts: 171
    Find a good book talking about anxiety and panic. The ways to calm yourself down.
    Keep telling yourself that you are not afraid of bridges, going out, etc. You are afraid of fear. Afraid of the feelings. Just remember that the feelings travel as if you were climbing a mountain. Anxiety into panic as you go up but there is a peak and it comes down from there. If you use certain techniques, you can ride out the peak and get over the other side. You can push the panic away. You will learn to quash things so that instead of a mountain you have to ride out, its a hill, then a small hill, then a bump.

    It will take a bit of time for your system to get back to more normal as the more panic attacks you have had, the more the system is sensitized and reacts faster because of this. Once you have learned the techniques to calm yourself, the faster your system will heal.

    I had been able to get rid of panic very quickly but anxiety is a tougher one to get rid of.

    Take every opportunity you can whether it's therapy by yourself or in a group.
  • Hi I can relate to your problem.I started having anxiety/panic attacks 6 years ago. I only recently am able to excersize because I was terrified of my heart rate going up and excersize kind of feels like a panic attack starting to me. I got a lot of help from a website called panicend.com. The site is free and they have a lot of sufferers and ex sufferers to talk to. I hope this helps,panic is the worst feeling ever! There is an end though so dont give up hope!!
  • Gee45
    Gee45 Posts: 171
    Would like to add, other than music like some have posted.... small games from a computer or hand held device works great at distracting. Tetris, etc. I've seen a study where people with post traumatic stress syndrome have gotten better faster with such distractions.

    Keep telling yourself that you are strong! You can over come this.
  • First of all - as a Mom I'm so PROUD of you for making a hard decision and taking action! I think it's great that your Mom is going to drive for you - that should help! A few things that you might want to try - can you read while traveling? I get motion sickness so I can't but a friend of mine who struggles with anixiety reads during travel and says it helps her a lot. She can get engrossed in a book and pay no attention to what is going on around her. Also, try loading up your ipod with all your favorite music and put those ear buds in (or noise cancelling earhones!) and enjoy your music. I think limiting some of the input from the outside world might help you cope! I'm no professional but that is how my dear friend does it and she says it helps! I'll be praying for you!
    Terri
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    You guys are awesome. Thank you all so much! I will take ALL of these into account. Thank you!
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    First of all - as a Mom I'm so PROUD of you for making a hard decision and taking action! I think it's great that your Mom is going to drive for you - that should help! A few things that you might want to try - can you read while traveling? I get motion sickness so I can't but a friend of mine who struggles with anixiety reads during travel and says it helps her a lot. She can get engrossed in a book and pay no attention to what is going on around her. Also, try loading up your ipod with all your favorite music and put those ear buds in (or noise cancelling earhones!) and enjoy your music. I think limiting some of the input from the outside world might help you cope! I'm no professional but that is how my dear friend does it and she says it helps! I'll be praying for you!
    Terri

    Awww thank you!! I unfortunately have motion sickness as well, but I will definitely try putting music on my MP3 and enjoying my music. I can also try taking my laptop and playing some games on it too :) Thanks!
  • gsager
    gsager Posts: 977 Member
    I was controlled by my fears a few years back, couldn't leave the house could sleep because my heart beep kept me awake. Would try putting my head on my husbands chest to listen to his heart instead of mine. I had alot of problems. I went too a lot of Dr's and took a lot of medicine. Finally I was told that my anxiety was a symptom of my depression and started on anti depressants. That even took a while, I thought I would never find one that would help me but I stuck with a Dr and we found one that would help me. I was on the for a few years. That was a while back and I don't need them any more. Of course if i had had to take them forever that would have been okay to have some peace. Good luck. I will pray for you.
  • Starla_
    Starla_ Posts: 349
    Would like to add, other than music like some have posted.... small games from a computer or hand held device works great at distracting. Tetris, etc. I've seen a study where people with post traumatic stress syndrome have gotten better faster with such distractions.

    Keep telling yourself that you are strong! You can over come this.


    I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and always have sudoku and solitaire on my phone lol. Little distractions that I can do anywhere I go :)
  • PeaceLuvVeggies
    PeaceLuvVeggies Posts: 375 Member
    Would like to add, other than music like some have posted.... small games from a computer or hand held device works great at distracting. Tetris, etc. I've seen a study where people with post traumatic stress syndrome have gotten better faster with such distractions.

    Keep telling yourself that you are strong! You can over come this.


    I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and always have sudoku and solitaire on my phone lol. Little distractions that I can do anywhere I go :)

    Sounds like a great idea and I love Sudoku LOL!
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
    I hate to suggest "drug" use, but whenever I fly I have to take something to knock me out. I had terrible fears of flying and would get scared at the sight of a plane over head. I had a friend how helped me through it (he is a pilot). He worked with me for years to over come my fear. I still take someting to knock me out on long flights and never, ever do I look out the windows. Just a thought, definitely not a solution.
    i have had to do the same thing and I think if you think you will have too much anxiety then you might want to take something. definitely helped me also while flying, the anti-sickness stuff, sorry cant remember right now, blonde!
  • sarah44254
    sarah44254 Posts: 3,078 Member
    I hate to suggest "drug" use, but whenever I fly I have to take something to knock me out. I had terrible fears of flying and would get scared at the sight of a plane over head. I had a friend how helped me through it (he is a pilot). He worked with me for years to over come my fear. I still take someting to knock me out on long flights and never, ever do I look out the windows. Just a thought, definitely not a solution.
    i have had to do the same thing and I think if you think you will have too much anxiety then you might want to take something. definitely helped me also while flying, the anti-sickness stuff, sorry cant remember right now, blonde!

    Dramamine?
  • sarah44254
    sarah44254 Posts: 3,078 Member
    I am learning a lot from my psychology professor, and we just went over anxiety disorders last week. She mentioned to us that exercise every day is just as effective as the leading prescription drug. If you are able, do some moderate exercise (brisk walk, workout dvd) for at least 20 mins a day. She didn't mention rest day or anything specific like that, just that 20 mins per day (you can split it up if you need to) had shown significant improvement over 6 weeks compared to folks just on the anti-anxiety meds and not exercising.

    You are making the best decision. Psychiatrists/Psychologists can really help you learn how to overcome this. A huge majority of people suffer from anxiety disorders. Going to get help is the best thing you can do. You will probably eventually get better on your own, but getting help now will reduce your suffering greatly.

    Know that you are doing the right thing <3 I hope this transition is a smooth one for you.
  • :flowerforyou: I have PTSD and GAD and take a Welbutrin (plan to try and wean off before years's end). I have found that yoga helps me more than any drug ever has! The deep breathing techniques, in conjunction with the movement (I do Vinyasa Flow...so one breath, one movement) is amazing. When mine first started, they were triggered by health anxiety (thought I was dying), and I had them all day and all night for about 2 weeks straight (lost 20lbs in a month, which was awful!). The drugs (I took Klonopin in the beginning) and therapy saved me! I think going back with your mom to get the help you need is going to change your life. Like another person stated, anxiety is "fear" manifested. Depends on what your fears are....mine was dying (it started when I was the same age as my father was when he died). I find that having a plan of attack is a great way to handle anxiety. Map out your trip, in writing, and come up with as many options for handling an attack as possible. Keep it with you and read it when you feel it starting. I used to allow myself to scream at the top of my lungs in the car (if I was alone), and cry as hard as I could if I felt one coming on while I was driving. Primal scream and all...Maybe being able to pull over and run in place, really fast, would help. Really deep breathing with positive affirmations...(sorry I am just brainstorming for you :smile: ). People think it is mind over matter! These people have never had a full blown panic attack! I feel your pain, and will be thinking of you! You have a lot of support here :love:
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