Makes Me Wanna Hollar... Please read if you are under 20

Crystal_Pistol

... and hate your body.

I am saying this in the most loving way possible, but I just really feel like it needs to be said:

I want you all to be healthy, but please understand that WHOLISTIC health is important. You will NEVER be your "ideal weight" if you don't grasp mentally that you are just okay because you are you.

I am 30 years old and I have gained 80 POUNDS. Let me say it again, 80 POUNDS!!! It saddens me that some of you young ladies feel so disgusted with yourselves because you are overweight or *think* you are overweight. With this 80lb gain, I still LOVE myself. I actually have had a hard time staying committed in the past because I look in the mirror and love myself so much!

I just don't remember ever having the self loathing for myself that I see in some of your posts. I loved my body when I was a teenager! I loved when I gained the freshman 15 because I felt like I looked more womanly. Do I love how I look now, 80lbs heavier? I'd be a liar if I said yes, but I certainly don't HATE it. I can still list so many things that I like about myself (I'm curvy, love that my boobs are bigger than my stomach so I can hide the extra middle in clothes, love having a booty, just love looking feminine in general). I want to lose weight because I want to be healthy. I want a body that screams HEALTHY when I walk by, muscular, curvy, strong- but DAMN SURE NOT skinny! I have opened some posts and seen some SCARY things tonight. 5'7" girls saying they want to weigh 90lbs, girls thinking of ways not to absorb the foods they put in their bodies, just really scary stuff to me.

We are supposed to eat. We are individuals, so we will all have variance. Please learn to appreciate your differences more and stop working so hard to stomp them out. Being healthy is very important, but a realistic view of what "healthy" means is MORE important.

I wish you all HUGE doses of self esteem!

SergeantSunshine_reused

Very very good post :]

It makes me sad too! I am under 20 and certainly do not want to be "skinny." I want to be lean and mean ;D

adjones5

I enjoy your post but it is a huge generalization to attribute this only to people who are under the age of 20. I am 22 but I still find it offensive when people stereotype my entire generation.

SergeantSunshine_reused

Hmm I think that for the most part it is true though. I see more people this way that are around 20 and under. Not so much in adults. I never see my mom or her friends complain how they aren't 90 lbs...
No need to get offended over this post.

push

Love your healthy attitude!

Crystal_Pistol

attribute this only to people who are under the age of 20.

I did this because psychologically, 18-20 is the age at which the "self" is considered to be developed.

I appreciate your feedback and will try to edit my initial post to reflect that this is directed specifically towards the young ladies under 20 who are having issues such as this. I understand that this is a larger issue in general, but am making a targeted statement to this specific group.

servilia

Very well said!
It saddens me when I observe the things you posted about. And these girls are all so beautiful and have their whole life ahead of them, I wish they were happy.

killerqueen17

I want a body that screams HEALTHY when I walk by, muscular, curvy, strong- but DAMN SURE NOT skinny!

I appreciate the intent behind your post... but please keep in mind that some women (usually middle/high school girls, but sometimes into college and beyond) are naturally skinny... and very self-conscious about it sometimes. I was naturally underweight as a teen, and sometimes people assumed I had an eating disorder, and would say things like "real women have curves" or "no guy wants a bag of bones," etc etc... which was hurtful, as it was simply my natural body type.

But I do understand that the point here in your post is not to skinny-bash, but to be happy with who you are, and to not find your self-worth in your weight... I read that, and I appreciate your intentions. I do agree with that. :flowerforyou:

Crystal_Pistol

I encouraged them to find their own, realistic view of what "healthy" is. For me at 30, personally, "muscular, curvy and strong" speak more to what I am interested in now. I was thin in high school and dealt with my family and friends accusing me of not eating throughout my entire junior year.

I am private messaging several young ladies right now and the general notion is that they are not "thin enough."

If anyone should read my initial post, I am an outpatient therapist and concerned primarily with breaking the distorted images that these young women have of themselves as not ______ enough.

thetiwi1890

Crystal,

Once again you've said all that needs to be said. Brilliant post!