Was my boyfriend lying?

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2

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  • n_parker21
    n_parker21 Posts: 8
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    Us men are simple beings...we don't always notice when gfs get hair cuts!

    If you didn't notice yourself gain 10 lbs, why would he?
  • PBJunky
    PBJunky Posts: 737 Member
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    When you see someone every day its really hard to notice a small gain like 10 lbs =) I think he was telling the truth.

    This^
  • softsculptor
    softsculptor Posts: 102
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    Us men are simple beings...we don't always notice when gfs get hair cuts!

    If you didn't notice yourself gain 10 lbs, why would he?

    Good point.
  • emergencytennis
    emergencytennis Posts: 864 Member
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    Truth. Why would he notice that?

    He will def notice if you lose weight from your boobs, though.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    Hon, 10 pounds is very little when it comes to weight gain, especially over a year. I personally didn't notice when I gained it!

    Same here. :smile: I didn't notice any difference. I thought my jeans just shrunk in the wash.
  • Crystal_R84
    Crystal_R84 Posts: 88 Member
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    When I had braces mine didn't even notice that I got them off! LOL so I doubt anyone would notice 10lb gain! Boys are silly. =-)
  • Shizzman
    Shizzman Posts: 527 Member
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    mat
    Don't mean to sound rude but does it really matter? Seems like he is happy for you that you lost weight and not commenting on the fact that you gained. Maybe you should just be happy that he is like that? :)

    No, ultimately it is not a big deal, which is why I haven't gotten angry about it. I would just like to know what is going on inside in terms of whether or not he finds me less attractive since I've gained weight.
    He sounds lovely and supportive.
    Would you rather he commented on the weight gain and never mentioned the loss?
    He no doubt noticed the spring you have in your step now you've lost some weight and how good it makes you feel. Thats all.

    He is lovely, which is what worries me. He is TOO nice! I am afraid he wouldn't be honest for fear it might hurt my feelings. The thing is, when I ask a direct question, I want a direct answer...

    Frankly it does kinda sound like you are looking for if you can be mad at him. If he did notice he probably doesn't want to make you feel worse...you probably asked in a way indicating you don't like the weight gain and if he cares he isn't going to notice. Anyways, he cares about you so he isn't going to notice/care about the weight gain, unless it is something that impacts your health.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    mat
    Don't mean to sound rude but does it really matter? Seems like he is happy for you that you lost weight and not commenting on the fact that you gained. Maybe you should just be happy that he is like that? :)

    No, ultimately it is not a big deal, which is why I haven't gotten angry about it. I would just like to know what is going on inside in terms of whether or not he finds me less attractive since I've gained weight.

    You need to be more secure in your relationship, if you think 10lbs of weight would make you less attractive to him, you are wrong. When you care about someone 10lbs is nothing. It doesn't even blip on the radar to them. Add in the fact most guys aren't the most perceiving at that kind of thing. It's not on our radar of cares. It's something women get to talk about :-D

    Men are simple, we get together... Food..Grilling...Sports/Football........weather.....Beer....work...and etc..

    If I ever heard one of my guy friends say.. "OH hey, did you see Kevin I think he gained 10lbs..." or "OH WOW Did you see Sarah she's put on at least 11 pounds" I'd give him a backhand upside the back of his head and he'd thank me for it later.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    Hon, 10 pounds is very little when it comes to weight gain, especially over a year. I personally didn't notice when I gained it!

    Same here. :smile: I didn't notice any difference. I thought my jeans just shrunk in the wash.

    Best part about this site is now I think the dryer is stretching my pants out!
  • MercenaryNoetic26
    MercenaryNoetic26 Posts: 2,747 Member
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    No, he's not lying. 10lbs is not significant at all, except to ourselves.
  • Monroe121
    Monroe121 Posts: 358 Member
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    I have put on 10 lbs in the course of a year, and he says he hasn't noticed.I don't know if he is trying to not hurt my feelings or what. He noticed that I've lost weight...so clearly he is paying attention.



    We critique ourselves way harder and notice the LITTLE things about ourselves. Others won't but will notice the big changes!
  • SharadaRose
    SharadaRose Posts: 69
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    Truth!!

    I think men don't worry about how much we weigh like we worry how much we way. If hes happy and he thinks your beautiful hes not going to notice a few pounds. It doesnt matter to him. Sounds like you have a great guy.
    And yeah like someone mentioned they notice when we loose weight because we bring it to there attention.
  • chickybuns
    chickybuns Posts: 1,037 Member
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    Probably depends where you gained the weight. If your breasts got bigger, he may of noticed, but not complained. When I lost 12 lbs and 13 inches doing Turbo Fire the first thing my husband noticed is that my breasts got smaller....,men :)
  • snowbune27
    snowbune27 Posts: 75 Member
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    Probably depends where you gained the weight. If your breasts got bigger, he may of noticed, but not complained. When I lost 12 lbs and 13 inches doing Turbo Fire the first thing my husband noticed is that my breasts got smaller....,men :)
    haha! i know ive gained weight when my husband likes my breasts. he goes "oh you look so good lately" translation: "you've gained weight, but i dont notice because all i'm staring at is your tits"
  • ShrinkRapt451
    ShrinkRapt451 Posts: 447 Member
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    I gotta agree with the gentlemen here. There is NOTHING wrong with a nice guy who doesn't obsess about your weight as much as you do, loves you for your fabulous self and not your skinny waist, and is honest about this. And you know what? A guy who DOES notice a 10-lb gain, and is willing to tell you, is controlling until proven otherwise.

    Do yourself a favor. Stop trying to do the mind-reading thing. Speaking as a woman who's learned her lesson on this one, I can honestly tell you that when you second guess what he says, and assume he must be lying just because it's not what you expected to hear, and then assign motives to him that are based only on your own discomfort, well.... That's relationship sabotage, pure and simple. Nobody wants to be accused of lying when they're being truthful. And the ones who aren't doormats will not stick around for that for long.

    So take a deep breath and spend your mental energy figuring out how your BF tells you he loves you. Physical affection? Words? Gifts? Favors (especially when you don't even have to ask)? If he's as good a guy as you say, you'll see it if you look. You work on your 10 lbs with your friends, and leave him out of it. You'll both be happier. :)
  • Becca_007
    Becca_007 Posts: 596 Member
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    mat
    Don't mean to sound rude but does it really matter? Seems like he is happy for you that you lost weight and not commenting on the fact that you gained. Maybe you should just be happy that he is like that? :)

    No, ultimately it is not a big deal, which is why I haven't gotten angry about it. I would just like to know what is going on inside in terms of whether or not he finds me less attractive since I've gained weight.
    I bet he could answer that question far better than us.:wink::flowerforyou: Plus what's most important is how you feel about yourself.
  • MîîśÊmÿłõü
    MîîśÊmÿłõü Posts: 285 Member
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    over a whole year i would believe him when he says he didnt notice, my hubby has noticed my boobs are smaller lol..men huh?
  • Becca_007
    Becca_007 Posts: 596 Member
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    He sounds lovely and supportive.
    Would you rather he commented on the weight gain and never mentioned the loss?
    He no doubt noticed the spring you have in your step now you've lost some weight and how good it makes you feel. Thats all.

    He is lovely, which is what worries me. He is TOO nice! I am afraid he wouldn't be honest for fear it might hurt my feelings. The thing is, when I ask a direct question, I want a direct answer...
    Anyone else think this has less to do with the 10bs. than issues in the relationship of insecurity and lack of trust etc.?
  • Rachiepie6
    Rachiepie6 Posts: 423 Member
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    Can totally believe that he didn't notice and also didn't care that you put weight on. My boyfriend didn't say anything about my weight gain over the last 3 years or the loss over the past few months (he works away so I didn't see him for 3 weeks when I lost heaps) really only mentions the change of breast size due to weight loss/gains and the pill lol
  • KayteeBear
    KayteeBear Posts: 1,040 Member
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    I'd say truth because it is hard to notice if you see the person every day. And 10 pounds isn't always a lot (depending on height and frame)

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