"perfect diet food"

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87beckyRN
87beckyRN Posts: 34
in Chit-Chat
I was at Wal-Mart buying a bag of Purina dog chow for my dog , in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog chow, RIGHT ??? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in inte...nsive care, with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say........................
HAHA thought someone might enjoy this!!!
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Replies

  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,239 Member
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    ROFLMAO!
  • KiyaK
    KiyaK Posts: 519 Member
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    That. Is. HILARIOUS!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • nkziv
    nkziv Posts: 161 Member
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    HAHAHAHA you're crazy!! I hope they knew you were kidding. LOL
  • 87beckyRN
    87beckyRN Posts: 34
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    HAHAHAHA you're crazy!! I hope they knew you were kidding. LOL

    I didn't actually do it, just a story I found...but it is an idea for next time someone asks me a dumb question!!
  • evans72002
    evans72002 Posts: 89 Member
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    Funny!!!!
  • Lanna74
    Lanna74 Posts: 203 Member
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    Aww...she was probably just wanting to talk about dogs with another dog person.
  • ShrinkingChelle
    ShrinkingChelle Posts: 187
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    Love this story!!
  • JennBrown83
    JennBrown83 Posts: 131 Member
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    That is so epically awesome... I LOVE when people ask obvious questions but THAT has got to be the BEST "here's your sign" response EVER!! Thank you for adding another laugh to my Friday afternoon!
  • BettyBudski
    BettyBudski Posts: 54 Member
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    lol thats awesome! :)
  • ShrinkingChelle
    ShrinkingChelle Posts: 187
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    Aww...she was probably just wanting to talk about dogs with another dog person.

    Then ask what kind of Dog, not if she had a dog.
  • _Peacebone_
    _Peacebone_ Posts: 229 Member
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    LOL I wish I had the balls to say stuff like this to people :laugh:
  • Thena81
    Thena81 Posts: 1,265 Member
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    that's so insanely funny and sounds like something one of my roomies would do.
  • Bretto
    Bretto Posts: 196 Member
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    Thanks for making me laugh!
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
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    lol, great story!
  • Lanna74
    Lanna74 Posts: 203 Member
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    Then ask what kind of Dog, not if she had a dog.
    [/quote]

    Nobody's perfect, are they?
  • snarky
    snarky Posts: 263 Member
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    good one!
  • mhotch
    mhotch Posts: 901 Member
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    That was a funny story!
  • dirtbikegirl5
    dirtbikegirl5 Posts: 391 Member
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    This was hilarious. How did you keep a straight face?
    This reminds me of the time we were loading up the moving truck in front of my mother-in-law's house and the neighbor down the street came over and said "Hm, moving?".
  • nekolita
    nekolita Posts: 16
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    sounds like a variation of the baby food diet lol
  • godroxmysox
    godroxmysox Posts: 1,491 Member
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    That is some funny stuff!

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