Lost my motivation

RuchMathers

first of all i wanna apologize for any grammatical error since English is not my first language.

ok here we go.I've been wanting to lose weight since...forever.i used to join this muay thai class in 2006.at that time i weighed at 50kg or less and 4 hours of training was so easy.then i had to quit after couple of months for my night class in uni (part time study).i ballooned up to 30kgs.my heaviest is 85kg.then Oct 2010 i had 2 in 1 operation (appendix and cyst removed).

on Feb this year,i joined the same class at the same studio again.being the biggest girl in the studio is never easy.but i told myself not to give damn and just torture myself with the workout.i had to stop for couple of months and back to the studio again on Sept.i told myself to take this seriously.I've lost 7kgs in 2 months by doing muay thai 6 days a week.There is a girl in the studio who is about the same size asked how i lost my weight and told me that im her inspiration.i never felt that good.i was never anyone's inspiration.so i decided to start with 4 hours (i normally go for 2 hours) everyday.and last 2 weeks,a friend of mine told me that she had a fight with her boyfriend (my trainer).i asked her why and she said 'he's been calling u fat all the time.he could at least respect me'. She said he's been calling me fatty this entire time instead of using my name.THAT made me so down.i lost my appetite,i didnt go for my training for almost a week. im so used to the name calling that sometimes i just dont care anymore. BUT being called like that by someone whom i look up to,is just frustrating. i cant find my motivation anymore.i had to force myself to go for training everyday. i dont like feeling the way i feel.i keep telling myself to prove him wrong.but its not enough for me to get back up and be thrilled for my training like i used to.i wanna quit but i love muay thai.i always have.i've tried other gyms that offer muay thai classes but the one that i go to now,have the best intense workout.plus its very near to my workplace.i need to get my motivation back.but i dont know how

thop123

That is so horrible! I'm so sorry that that happened to you! I would be less motivated too ( Is there any way you can join another gym? Dont give your money to that trainer, obviously he is a major loser. Go somewhere where the trainer is positive and sees that you are working to improve yourself.
Gosh thats horrible, but your right, you've got to prove to him that you are strong and motivated and that you can do anything you set your mind to. Go somewhere else, get fit, and then go back to his class and throw it in his face!

cherdan

He is out of line, never mind completely unprofessional. I would not only seek a supportive instructor elsewhere, I would report his offensive behavior to higher-ups at his company. Whether it was a private couples quarrel or not, you were made aware of it by someone who he made the comment to directly. Not only for your own vindication, his behavior is seriously damaging to a business.. once they know he's a sizeist prick, they will see him as a liability to drive away other potential clients.

Don't give up. Use this to add fuel to the fire. When I first started losing weight, I went out with a friend (who I later cut off, as eventually ALL she did was talk about my weight, her weight, every females' weight, etc), whose male friend drunkenly insulted my weight. She apologised later for him, and said he wanted to apologise to me personally, but I had already said "goodbye, and good ****in riddance" to all these lowlifes and used this pain to kick my weight loss into overdrive.

Leave all the losers in the dust, and stay steady on your path. You gotta see the big picture.

rochey1098

That idiot needs to grow up, I've met my fair share of societies idea of a joke and the one thing that rings true every time is that they're covering something up. Bullies are weak, what they bully you for doesn't matter, they're hiding behind it in an effort to make themselves look stronger.

Here's the strange thing, you've lost weight while they bombarded you with insults, this one hit hard and knocked you down, now you're going to get back up and keep doing what you want to do. I know you're going to do that because if you don't then you're giving that pretentious little chimp exactly what he wants. Now you tell me, who is the strong one? He's pathetic and always will be, your strength of character is something that was earned over years of struggle, use that to your advantage.

jonzo21

That's sad, and although it doesn't mean much coming from me or anyone else here, I'm really sorry he's that insensitive. Don't let it demotivate you though. You have someone that looks up to you, imagine how other's around you will feel when they see you're dedicated enough and lose even MORE! I personally would use his mean remark as the opposite---make it even MORE motivation to achieve your goal. Show him it can be done. Show him that his words are NOT powerful enough to make you lose sight of your goals. Show him that he means nothing to you but just another coach you are USING to achieve your goals!

When I first decided to lose weight, I didn't take it seriously until my boss at work called me fat (on multiple occasions) even though he wasn't all that healthy either. He had talked about losing weight, and I knew right then and there I had to do it BEFORE him. That's when I became motivated to take it seriously. I dropped a few pant sizes and it became noticeable to my coworkers, but he never complimented me or anything, but he would talk about how he was losing weight (even though it didn't look like it). Well, he ended up getting fired (go figure) and the last time I saw him, I was 30lbs heavier. Would LOVE for him to come in one day and see me now.

Stay motivated, don't let someone who doesn't mean anything derail all the progress you've made so far.

nenamartinez

Wow, I'm so angry for you. That guy is a major *kitten*!! UGH!! :mad:

Obviously you're amazing, working out that hard. I wish I had just a little bit of your motivation!!

red_hatorade

I would definitely report this a-hole.

tdmcmains

I would kind of call him on it -- "so you think i'm fat, *kitten*?" Let him feel like a jerk. And then, new gym or not, do your thing, get back in shape, don't let this idiot keep you down. What you're doing has nothing to do with him. Yeah, I guess you can shove it in his face later but you're doing this for you. (also, if you do any sparring, an accidental hit below the belt sounds perfectly reasonable to me).

RuchMathers

Thank you everyone for your kind words.Some Asians think that being harsh to other people will actually motivate them.Sigh.Im glad i let it out here in the forum.and im sorry for replying late as i was down with Dengue fever

Anyway,i cant really report this trainer as he is the main instructor and godson of the owner.and he runs this branch(we have 2 branches).so basically he's the man of the studio.cant do anything about it.The funny thing is he doesnt seem to have problem with any girls but me.although he still call them names but its not as bad as he did to me.there was once,during body conditioning we had to kick inner thighs 50 times each and he asked my partner (a boy) to kick me so hard because i was picking on his gf (me and his gf prank each other all the time) so the kid kicked me so hard that i had big bruises on the spot and can hardly walk.i had to take few days off my training.but i refused to cry in front of him because im pretty sure he wanted to see my tears.

Now,after reading your comments,i will show him that his name calling and bullying me doesnt effect me or my training.Thank u everyone!