My boyfriend doesnt want me to lose weight

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  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
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    GO TEAM!`
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
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    you do you and if he can't get onboard, then do a cheer as you show him the door.
  • eatlift
    eatlift Posts: 113
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    Lose the weight girl, do what you gotta do! Just keep him assured that you still want him though cause it sounds like he's scared you'll get too hot and might leave him.
  • debussyschild
    debussyschild Posts: 804 Member
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    Did you ever ask him why?

    I'm betting, considering he started "moping" and acting like a 2 year old about it, he just likes his girl to be a little thicker. I've heard the same reasoning from LOTS of guys before. If he loves her, he'll love her 10 lbs lighter or he can go pack sand.
  • engineman312
    engineman312 Posts: 3,450 Member
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    if you want to drop 5-10 pounds to stay competitive in your sport, thats what you have to do. no different then wrestlers cutting weight before a match. just be healthy about it.
  • ummlovelovesyou
    ummlovelovesyou Posts: 1,024 Member
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    you do you and if he can't get onboard, then do a cheer as you show him the door.

    this!
  • luckybunny84
    luckybunny84 Posts: 82
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    You are beautiful as you are, but if this is what you want then as long as you are doing it the healthy way and it makes you happy them I say go for it. This is not an easy lesson to learn but a guy should love you no matter what you look like, if he cant do that than you can do better :)
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
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    As long as you know you are being healthy, do what makes you happy. Talk to him about it, and let him know that you respect his opinions, but ultimately it's your body and your choice. You could also just not tell him. Good luck!
  • HonkyTonks
    HonkyTonks Posts: 1,193 Member
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    I dont know if anyone can give me any input on what to do but my boyfriend is dead set on me not losing weight. my whole life i have been so self concious of my body. Since i got on this website I have lost 6 pounds and feel great, but he noticed and doesnt like it. I am definatly not a skinny ***** but im not big either. I am 5 foot 3inches and have a small frame. I am captain of my cheerleading team and have just been made a top girl so i need to lose a bit of weight so i can remain competative with the younger top girls. I dont know what to do about my boyfriend though. He gets very mopey and sad even though im still a solid 120lbs (the typical top is about 110lbs and under- and my height). I am being very healthy about losing weight and doing it slowly but he doesnt understand, what should i do? I dont think i should give up my goals for him but i want him to be happy.

    Hmmm, well without knowing the full story there could be any number of things going on.

    He could be worried/insecure as some have mentioned, and concerned he'd lose you to other guys if you lost weight... if he is this insecure then he is probably not worth your time and energy.

    He may be genuinely concerned about your health, he might think that is too slim or that you're being obsessive and that it might be verging on an eating disorder? Not saying that you sound like you are too obsessive, just that some people can over worry about things like this. Without knowing you personally it's impossible to tell.

    He also might be worried he'll find you less attractive if you lose weight? I have read a lot of men say they do not find very very slim women attractive and prefer sort of middle of the healthy range. He might just be worried you'll get too thin? It's the same as guys not liking their girlfriends/wives putting on weight. Or even vice versa - physical attraction is important to most people.

    In any case, it's your body and life and you should do what makes you happy.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
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    110 pounds is not an average weight for someone who is 5'3''.

    He is probably concerned for your health.
    I think that is a very average weight, especially for a young and active girl...I mean, it's small, but it can be perfectly healthy. I was 125 lbs at 5'6" when I was younger, and I was by no means too thin.
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
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    My husband likes me on the squishy side, but he also knows that I want to be a smaller, healthier size so I feel confident. And confidence is a lot more attractive than any "magic size."
    There is nothing wrong with someone having a preference of how their significant other looks. It only becomes a problem.when the person insists that their significant other has to look a certain way or act a certain way. Some people are simply not compatible, and some people are more willing to compromise.
    Obviously, you feel the need to lose some weight to stay competitive in a sport that is important to you. There isn't a lot of room for compromise there. This might just have to be an area where you agree to disagree.
  • MrsNoir
    MrsNoir Posts: 236 Member
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    I had once a boyfriend who didn't want me to lose weight either, he preferred me slightly chubby, well, later on I found he was going online and checking pics of very fit girls!! it annoyed me soooo much, I slaped him in the face, how was it that there were no chubby girl at all in the naked pic he was checking?...Well.. he still made his point by going out with a couple of chubby girls after he became my ex, so perhaps it's true he mainly likes the face, and he loves some lovehandles to grab.... but yeah, just ignore him, keep losing weight your way, he's just probably scared that more guys will try to date you if you become even hotter!! I think that's all! so yeah, go girl for your dream, you're too young to give it up for a man, if he really loves you he should love you slimmer or heavier. :D, but after all your body belongs to you. :D
  • Molly182
    Molly182 Posts: 406
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    Maybe he's jealous? Maybe he just loves your body the way it is? It seems like he wouldn't be doing it to make sure you knew he's happy with you the way you are. He should be supportive. Do this for you. You don't want to be with somebody who doesn't support something you care about so much, do you?

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