Not sure I want to be an 'inspiration'

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  • Huskerduer
    Huskerduer Posts: 8 Member
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    Yeah, I need to reply to my own reply!

    I didn't mean the people who say you inspire them are haters, lol! I mean to those that tell you you're too skinny; they're usually just insecure.
  • Renea_Kay
    Renea_Kay Posts: 189 Member
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    oh yes...but for another reason.....when you lose all that weight but then gain some of it back...then you feel like a complete failure....i've had this happen.... its why i dont want to really be an inspiration
  • Mary2270
    Mary2270 Posts: 32
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    Great topic. I have been experiencing the same thing recently. For me, the weight was a way to "hide" from the world areound me. Nobody notices a "Fat girl" other than to make fun of her....Anyway, our minds do weird things. I lost a lot of weight before and was about 60 pounds away from goalj. Everyone was oohing and ahhing, etc over my success. I went from 407# down to 230. I freaked out internally and gained back about 70 pounds. In September, I decided enough was enough, I looked inside my thinking, etc and dealt with the issues causing me to gain weight. I have now lost 35 pounds again and people are noticing. They tell me what an inspiration I am, etc. This time, though, since I dealt with the issues, I am prepared for them. It feels good to be noticed and told I look good. I am in control of my eating, exercising, and thoughts. I have those around me that start, but for one reason or another go the other way and gain. I am not responsible for them. I am responsible for me only. It took me a long time to realize this, but I did. :)
  • Nikki582
    Nikki582 Posts: 561 Member
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    Since I started my journey I've had a few people tell me i inspire them to make changes.

    While I hear you, I do feel a pang of "Oh goodness, what if I fail?" but then I realise I can use that 'pang' to never quit - keep going, keep inspiring. Them say I inspire them, inspires me to train harder.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
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    Since I started my journey I've had a few people tell me i inspire them to make changes.

    While I hear you, I do feel a pang of "Oh goodness, what if I fail?" but then I realise I can use that 'pang' to never quit - keep going, keep inspiring. Them say I inspire them, inspires me to train harder.

    If I see a gain on the scale, its because that damn cheesecake was UBER GOOD! 8-)
  • RAFValentina
    RAFValentina Posts: 1,231 Member
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    I agree... what bout the one day you WANT to go over your calories, or NOT exercise or NOT burn over 1000 calories?! Or run 13km each time or workout twice a day... I was doing this as a boost and a stress buster... part of a spike up to resuming a normal healthy lifestyle... but then you end up with this mad way of life where you feel like you'll let others down if you don't accomplish it and you find weird and wonderful ways of making it happen. Recently have been trying to stop that...but find it hard! I just want people to see me as a normal gal who does do exercise and makes it count! Not as some machine!

    GIVE ME A BREAK-COS I'M THE SORT OF PERSON WHO FEELS OBLIGED TO "KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!"
    If your friends are even the slightest bit intelligent (and I bet they are), they understand that you're human. Taking a break is important. People need breaks. When they say "keep up the good work" they don't mean "burn 1000 calories everyday or else you're a failure and you're letting me down". They mean you're doing a great job overall. Not everyday has to be the best day ever. Don't worry that people are judging you for not running everyday. They're not. They're proud of your success and completely understand the need for a rest or a cheat every now and then.

    I know really but thanks for writing it anyway in case anyone else was thinking it.... I mean today... I just did 2 long dog walks and ate pretty much one side of the gingerbread house roof! Pigged! Hahaha!
  • WendyKing1974
    WendyKing1974 Posts: 80 Member
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    I know this thread is a couple of months old, but I was trying to see if anyone else felt like me. I lost 144lbs (gained 12lb back in the past 2 weeks). Every single day I hear you're an inspiration to me. Can you come talk to this group of people? How did you do it (I too get a sad, disappointed response when I say eat less, exercise more)? It's too much pressure! I still have 100lbs to lose. I'm getting to a point where I'm smaller than I've been since high school. I'm already having to deal with my own issues of what it means to be moving into territory I've either never been in or haven't been in 20yrs. I can feel myself caving under the pressure (hence the 12lb gain). If I'm not losing weight, then I don't have everyone looking at me and putting me up as the poster child for weightloss. I've got to get my head on straight to finish this, but at this moment I don't know how.
  • JeSuisPrest
    JeSuisPrest Posts: 2,005 Member
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    Let go of the "pressure", try to politely say thank you and change the topic. Are you losing weight for yourself or for those around you? This is for you and only. Why would you give up on yourself? Your thoughts are your own, no one can make you the "poster child", so don't let them live in your head rent free. Shake off the comments and continue living a healthier lifestyle!!
  • ReclaimingSarah
    ReclaimingSarah Posts: 250 Member
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    I have actually inspired a handful of friends to start their own weight loss journeys. I do feel like I can't fail now, because if I was the original inspiration and I fail, are they going to give up too? So, by being an inspiration, I get inspired to keep going because I hate letting people down. Does that make sense? :laugh:
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    So I've lost 87 pounds over the last 15 months and feel pretty darn good about myself. I get a lot of compliments at work and have had several people tell me that I'm an inspiration to them.

    Problem is, I'm not sure I want to be their inspiration.... I mean, I appreciate what they mean (and always smile and say thanks), but that makes me feel almost responsible for their success for failure.

    Does anyone else who's lost weight feel that way?

    You don't have to do anything different to be an inspiration, you just have to keep doing what you are doing. There is no reason to feel pressure over that. Rock it out and if you inspire someone great.

    What annoys me is when I have people who I don't see busting it at the gym trying to tell me how to work out or supplement. I take the supplements I've researched for myself and I feel gives me the edge I need. I also have created my own workout program from several other programs, I don't need to know about the work out you've read in a fitness magazine. That comes off snotty but at my work place people are always trying to tell me how I should be doing things.. I've never came out and said it, but I'm in better shape then most of them!
  • Sydney0710
    Sydney0710 Posts: 61 Member
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    I can't relate to having dramatic weight loss, but I really can't wrap my head around how someone telling you that you are an inspiration (meaning, a positive example) means you are somehow responsible for anything on any level. It's simply telling you how you have accomplished something worthwhile and *maybe* with your story in mind it will help the other person on their journey towards weight loss/healthier lifestyle.

    I wonder if it's not so much feeling a sense of responsibility as it is feeling a little awkward when the person can't achieve what you did -- as if you are somehow "one upping" them?
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
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    I know this thread is a couple of months old, but I was trying to see if anyone else felt like me. I lost 144lbs (gained 12lb back in the past 2 weeks). Every single day I hear you're an inspiration to me. Can you come talk to this group of people? How did you do it (I too get a sad, disappointed response when I say eat less, exercise more)? It's too much pressure! I still have 100lbs to lose. I'm getting to a point where I'm smaller than I've been since high school. I'm already having to deal with my own issues of what it means to be moving into territory I've either never been in or haven't been in 20yrs. I can feel myself caving under the pressure (hence the 12lb gain). If I'm not losing weight, then I don't have everyone looking at me and putting me up as the poster child for weightloss. I've got to get my head on straight to finish this, but at this moment I don't know how.
    You need to keep in mind that any pressure you're feeling is self-manufactured. No one else is going to live and die by how many more pounds you lose. As far as those asking you to speak about your success, if it were me, I'd brush them off and downplay my success in a manner you're pretty much already doing. Say something like "There's no secret. All I've done is eat less and move more. Anyone can do it if they put their mind to it."

    By the way, congrats for your success thus far. I sincerely hope you discover that you like the new healthier you.

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