Emotional Eating...I need HELP

mommamindi

Last night before bed I got a call from my mother who wanted to pass on a message from my rapist...AKA my step father....he gets off probation today for the abuse against me...she made sure to tell me that "he loves me" and he is "sorry" and that he hopes "I can forgive him"....needless to say last night I slept horribly, night terrors and tossing and turning. I made a "decent" choice for breakfast this morning, but as I sit here, all I want to do is eat myself into a coma. This is my first obsticle since starting my lifestyle change...I did great avoiding my daughters birthday cake...unhealthy pizza...the bag of chips screaming my name...but I think today is going to be much harder then that...any tips?

mugsisme

I've never been in your shoes, but IMHO, can you channel this fear and energy into exercise rather than food? The exercise will release endorphin's, which should calm you down and make you feel a little better. Do you have any workout videos that you can do?

This must be so scary for you! Sending you hugs.

Calipalm

I agree with the post above me, to try and channel the emotion into a work out! Maybe go for a run with loud music on? I am an emotional eater too. One thing I urge to remember is that eating will only make you hurt more emotionally when you realize what or how much you've consumed. Think about the amazing progress you've made so far, and think about how you want to accomplish so much more. Emotionally eating will only put you one step back. You may not be able to control the emotional issue at hand with your stepfather, but you can control what you eat! So think about keeping positive with what you eat! You have done so well don't let yourself take a step back! You have the strength! Channel it properly! Go practice for your marathon! Use the emotion for your benefit to go the extra mile!!

medangel06

You have a trigger. You must deal with it. I would suggest counselling. But first you need to write it all out. I know it hurts and there will be tears and anger but get it out of you. Once that is done make a plan for moving on. Focus on scheduled workouts and outings. Don't forget to breath. You can't change him. He has changed you. You decide how that change will be directed. You are where you are today because of what happened. You will be and can be stronger because of the experiences you have had. Make that choice. Be brave. Be strong. You have come so far don't let HIM stand in your way.

I was raped. Then almost ten years later he contacted me again. It was like I was raped all over again. I had told no one when it happened. I had a mental break when he contacted me again. Trust me you can beat this. Believe in yourself because I believe in you.

mommamindi

You have a trigger. You must deal with it. I would suggest counselling. But first you need to write it all out. I know it hurts and there will be tears and anger but get it out of you. Once that is done make a plan for moving on. Focus on scheduled workouts and outings. Don't forget to breath. You can't change him. He has changed you. You decide how that change will be directed. You are where you are today because of what happened. You will be and can be stronger because of the experiences you have had. Make that choice. Be brave. Be strong. You have come so far don't let HIM stand in your way.

I was raped. Then almost ten years later he contacted me again. It was like I was raped all over again. I had told no one when it happened. I had a mental break when he contacted me again. Trust me you can beat this. Believe in yourself because I believe in you.

I have been in counseling for 7 years, since I escaped the abuse. I had made great progress and it wasnt affecting my day to day life until now. My biggest hurdle in this is he was my dad for 15 years before the year of daily abuse, both physical and sexual. He was the only dad I knew really, and then this happened and not only did I have to mourn the loss of a dad, but the loss of a mom as well...she threw me out of the house when I turned him into the police because I "seduced" him. I spent the rest of my teen years in foster care. With him getting off probation now it was brought back to my attention that he isnt actually dead and that he chose to hurt me rather then to be a dad...I didnt think it would affect me life this...

And yet I am glad I joined MFP when I did...I joined a week ago, and knew nothing about him getting off....if I was not a member here, I have no doubt I would have stayed in bed for days eating myself to death...I began to eat like this when the abuse started to make myself more unattractive to him, and there is no way in hell I want to fall into that trap again

Mamapengu

You can use this instead of letting it use you. I have not gone through this but did have my 'dad' tell me when I got engaged 'well, I guess you can always divorce him.' When the expected hard times came I had to sit myself down and decide that he would be wrong and I would prove he was wrong and my choice was not a failure. From there I was able to look for new ways to make my life tolerable and my marriage a success. We've now been married 18 years and very happy. So, can you do the same and tell yourself that he is no longer going to control you, but you are going to prove to them and yourself that you are better and stronger than they could ever imagine? It did help me to stop calling him 'dad' and now I use his name. I just don't expect the things from 'Steve' that I expected from 'dad,' like support. hugs, you can do this.