Disgusted with my self

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Jessame
Jessame Posts: 11
in Motivation and Support
I don't know what is wrong with me. I know that I need to drop a minimum of 50lbs. I can't stand looking in the mirror because I want to cry at what I see when I don't have clothes on. I look so awful. but I still can't get motivated to do anything about it. Is it because of how I look that I just gave up? What will it take for me to do this?

Replies

  • ChantelleFowler
    ChantelleFowler Posts: 208 Member
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    I know how you feel..I have been there.

    You just need to start your lifestyle change with changing your thought patterns! Sure, maybe you're not how you want to look right now but use that as MOTIVATION to make the change instead of using it as means of putting yourself down. You need to look in the mirror next time and say "This is my 'before' body!" and start making those healthy lifestyle changes that are going to get you on the right track. Start eating healthy and keeping track of EVERYTHING you put in your body using MyFitnessPal! It's an excellent tool for seeing just how much you're eating. If you're not used to exercising, start by going for short walks. Increase your walk distance each time you go out for one. If you have the cash, hire a personal trainer. They are there to help you and can answer any questions you have. But I really think that in order to make the commitment to change your body, you have to start with changing the way you think about yourself!
  • shine_
    shine_ Posts: 150 Member
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    Try to look at yourself in a new way. When you look at yourself in the mirror try to see the potential, try to see you, the person you want to be and the person you know you truly are underneath the weight you feel so unhappy about and then try to motivate yourself for that 'you'. The weight shouldn't define who you are. You're not awful or disgusting, you're strong and in control. You're eager to change and get to know a new, healthier you.

    I'd start out by setting lots of smaller goals. Even though you know you want to lose 50lbs, aim for 5 at first. That way it won't feel so far away. If you're trying to get started and you have this massive task ahead of you it will feel more overwhelming and it can be hard to know where to start. Once you've lost the first 5 and you've reached that first goal (it will feel amazing!) aim to lose another 5 and so on.
  • alishuman
    alishuman Posts: 62
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    I agree with Chantelle - you need to change your thinking! Easier said than done, I know. But you are beautiful!

    Maybe you don't like everything about yourself, but focus on the positives you see, and realize that you are worth taking care of. And you can add me if you like - I've been in your shoes...
  • Nicola0000
    Nicola0000 Posts: 531 Member
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    write down what you want to achieve. How will losing 50lb change your life? What will the benefits be? How does being the weight you are now make you feel?

    I felt the same as you, and now ive lost 48lb and weight 131lb, I now look in the mirror and sometimes have to take a double look! It makes you feel so proud of yourself that youve achieved it.

    A good book to read is Jillian Michaels Unlimited. Its great and I think it will really help you.

    You have made that first step in being on this site in the first place. Try it for 2 weeks, and when you see that first bit of weight come off, its so motivating that you'll want to carry on. Trust me, this site works!!! x x
  • jitzu31
    jitzu31 Posts: 6 Member
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    Starting with smaller goals is key. Your goals will fee attainable and as you reach each one you will be motivated to hit the next one.
  • SueGremlin
    SueGremlin Posts: 1,066 Member
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    I joined this site with no concrete intent to "diet". I thought there would be no harm in writing down everything I ate. I haven't looked back since. I have struggled with my weight for my entire life, (I remember people calling me fat when I was 4 years old) and this is the first time ever I fully understand what it's like to eat a healthy amount.
    I started out with 80 lbs to lose and am taking my sweet time getting there. I've been here for 6 months and am officially halfway there. I figure, in a year, I'll be a year older, heavy or not.

    MFP is one of the best things that ever happened to me. It's a tool that I will use forever.
  • melaniecheeks
    melaniecheeks Posts: 6,349 Member
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    You've made the right decision by joining MFP, so give yourself a pat on the back for that!

    It can seem very daunting to begin with, but take it one day at a time.
  • Jessame
    Jessame Posts: 11
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    Wow! You all are so amazing!! I will start with smaller goal of like 5lbs. Once I lose that I will restart at 5lbs. Smaller is better. Thanks to all of your for motivating replies. It has really helped So I shall being today!!:bigsmile:
  • pupcamper
    pupcamper Posts: 415 Member
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    Maybe it is because you are putting too much pressure on yourself! Telling yourself you have at least 50lbs to lose, you are probably thinking I'll never be able to do it - 50lbs+ is a big goal. Try and set yourself some smaller realistic goals, the soon add up and do wonders for your motivation. Focus on losing the first 10 lbs and make small steps towards increasing the physical activity rather than expecting to be an athelete overnight! As for the mirror ditch it if all you are going to do is look in it and think negative thoughts about yourself. Weigh youself, take your measurements and take some pictures and draw a line under it, with a couple of months and some baby steps you will be amazed at the change! Best of all you will soon start to see changes in not only your body but your energy level and confidence! YOU CAN DO IT - good luck and remember it is a journey not a race! :drinker:
  • ginnylee74
    ginnylee74 Posts: 398 Member
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    Try to look at yourself in a new way. When you look at yourself in the mirror try to see the potential, try to see you, the person you want to be and the person you know you truly are underneath the weight you feel so unhappy about and then try to motivate yourself for that 'you'. The weight shouldn't define who you are. You're not awful or disgusting, you're strong and in control. You're eager to change and get to know a new, healthier you.

    I'd start out by setting lots of smaller goals. Even though you know you want to lose 50lbs, aim for 5 at first. That way it won't feel so far away. If you're trying to get started and you have this massive task ahead of you it will feel more overwhelming and it can be hard to know where to start. Once you've lost the first 5 and you've reached that first goal (it will feel amazing!) aim to lose another 5 and so on.

    Excellent advise. We've all been ther. I will add one thing and that is; when you keep track of your food make notes in your food and exercise diary. That way when you lose weight (and you will) you can look back and see how you were feeling that day. It has helped me a lot. Yesterday was a hard day for me. I made it through even though I OVER INDULGED. Don't set you goals so high they defeat you. I keep them low. Feel free to add me as a friend if you would like.
  • dulie76
    dulie76 Posts: 20 Member
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    I am totally in the same boat! All my life I have been a somewhat small person, over the past few years I have managed to get past my full term pregnant weight (50 lbs overweight). I know that exact feeling of looking at yourself in the mirror and thinking "who is that person?". I agree with everyone who says that you have to change the way you think. I have been working on this and it really makes it easier to eat better and exercise. Be nice to yourself. I keep telling myself that I'm not going to loose weight over night, but if I don't start now, soon a year will have past and I'll still be fat and unhappy and wishing that I would have started my weight loss journey then. One day at a time and eventually you'll get there. You can add me as a friend if you want, hearing others success stories and struggles is motivating to me. Good luck, you can do this!!!!
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
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    If you wouldn't say it to someone you love, don't say it to yourself.
  • melaniecheeks
    melaniecheeks Posts: 6,349 Member
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    Where's the like button? That's a great statement.
  • beautyreaps
    beautyreaps Posts: 151
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    If you wouldn't say it to someone you love, don't say it to yourself.

    ^Love what you just said. I'm going to keep that in mind as well.

    I agree with what's been said. Don't overload yourself. It took time to put that weight on and it takes time to get it off for good! So, ignore those "quick fix" notions in your head and make small goals. You'll feel amazing when you accomplish them and you'll get closer to your main weight loss goal. You can do this! (:
  • calvert6183
    calvert6183 Posts: 539 Member
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    I don't know what is wrong with me. I know that I need to drop a minimum of 50lbs. I can't stand looking in the mirror because I want to cry at what I see when I don't have clothes on. I look so awful. but I still can't get motivated to do anything about it. Is it because of how I look that I just gave up? What will it take for me to do this?

    My heart goes out to you and Il keep you in my prayers. MFP is a safe and amazing place for support and friendship. We all have own battles but we are all in this together. Keep your head up and try to see what others see and that is you are a very beautiful woman. Like others pointed out, start with small goals, its easier to not get discouraged and easier to meet and over time a bunch of smalls goals equals a huge reward. If you ever need anything, we all are here for you.

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