I Feel Overwhelmed with my Inability to suceed

MireyaDNL

Ok, so Im 20 yrs old & i have 2 bby girls. One about to turn 1, the other about to turn 3. I live in a one bedroom apartment with my boyfriend. But my brother & his gf are currently living in our living room.

My bf works the night shift & with my bro & his gf i can nvr really know they're schedule because it varies so often. but usually i have to keep my girls quiet for everyone to b able to sleep.

Our bathroom is in the bedroom & the kitchen is just passing the living room, Meaning that there's always a moment when someone is walking into someone else's "room."

When it was just me & my bf, & he used to work a regular 7am-4pm shift, i was able to workout, clean the house, cook, & even play with my girls. But now b/c of the circumstances i feel an overwhelming amout of dissapointment & unaccomplishment with myself since im always treading on eggshells to make sure my girls let everyone sleep & dnt make a mess in whats not ours.

And at the end of the day i find that all I've done is basically cook & eat. because since everyone is sleeping i cant exactly go cleaning everything & jumping around doing my workout (turbo fire)


I dnt kno wat to do!

We are gonna move within a month to a 2 bedroom apmt, where i hope that at least there i will find some sanity, But in the meantime i dnt wanna stay like this doing nothing & feeling quite useless.

HELP!!!

Sorova

Is there any way you can find time to get out of the house? Take advantage of the fact that you have a lot of adults there who could watch the children for a short period. For example, would it be possible for someone else to look after the kids for an hour so you can get out for a walk or run? It might not be your usual workout, but it's something. The exercise would probably be a great stress reliever, too.

If that's not possible, why not put the kids in a stroller and head out with them for a walk?

It definitely sounds like a difficult situation, and I hope things get better for you once you move to a larger place.

MireyaDNL

I would love to get out of the house, but i live in chicago, & though the last few days were rather nice (which i shouldve taken advantage of) We are expecting a pretty big snowstorm coming our way tomorrow

And i do have a lot of adults in the house but they are usually asleep half the time lol (with there work schedule & all)

I recently found out about a gym thats open 24hrs, has low rates & suposedly has unlimited babysitting. My bf said he'd pay it for me, but hasnt brought it up lately. And with all the econimic situation going on I'd hate to be another burden.

BTW I really do apreciate your reply, beacuse sometimes i feel like noone understands me

Gshields42

It sounds like you are making a lot of sacrifices for your family. I'm impressed that you've been able to keep it together, because I would be pulling my hair out. Just in the cases of indivdual weeks around holidays where there would be overcrowding I get irritated.

I'm assuming that your brother and his gf are chipping in to help with the financial situation. Sometimes you have to be selfish and take care of yourself. With the sacrifices you are going through, I would think it would be more than justified to insist on that gym membership.

In a high stress situation like that, everyone has to step in to keep the sanity. It's not out of line for you to demand on some help, especially to get the occassional amount of time to yourself.

MireyaDNL

Wow.. it really amazes me to even read that because i feel like here at home im always the "bad guy" cuz i cant keep it quiet or clean or watever their demands are.

I feel like i can always hear them whispering that im a bad mom or a bad housekeeper or even that im a joke for saying that im trying to get fit because i dnt do much at all.

Yea my brother has started helping this month. (hes been here for 4months now). But sometimes i felt it would be mean of me to charge him for sleeping in a living room with no privacy & well the inconvinience of my bbys being all over the place

But im completely honest when i say that i spent most my day keeping my girls away from things that can break or that can break them or that can break someones sleep.

I think i am going to consider asking my boyfriend for us to take a second look at that gym membership. Because i REALLY need to find time for myself again

naku

wow... hang in there girl. it really sounds like you're a bit of a everyday superhero under the circumstances.
and get some time to yourself! you need it and most importantly you DESERVE it.

LuckyAng

Oh wow, I think you are an extremely kind person!! I would lose my mind! I really hope you find a peaceful resolution soon :brokenheart: