Rude People

Candida1983

Okay, I'm not one to start drama or anything, so it kind of bothers me :grumble: when I get on here and I see people who are supposed to be supportive and encouraging bashing other people and being rude and critical. :noway: I thought the whole point of "My Fitness Pal" was to be able to connect with other SUPPORTIVE, ENCOURAGING, NICE people that aren't going to put you down and start drama? Maybe I got this wrong? :huh:

Becoming_A_Butterfly

In any large group of people, there will be rude people. I weed it out, ignore it, avoid it, or confront it as I see fit, but I don't let it get in the way of my experience here.

Candida1983

Great response! When does it get to the point where you feel you have to say something? Like I said, I don't like drama, but if someone is bashing someone else, that's usually when I step in and say something.

jennajava

If you searched this topic, you would find it has been brought up time and time again. Alas, it is one of the mysteries of MFP. Or the interweb, in general.

SergeantSunshine_reused

This is still the internet and has real people. The world isn't full of people that are going to reach out and hug your soul :flowerforyou:

Just have to surround yourself with the people you prefer :] I have a great friends list. Some of the "rude" people can be quite nice when you talk to them more too actually :]

seehawkmomma

Okay, I'm not one to start drama or anything, so it kind of bothers me :grumble: when I get on here and I see people who are supposed to be supportive and encouraging bashing other people and being rude and critical. :noway: I thought the whole point of "My Fitness Pal" was to be able to connect with other SUPPORTIVE, ENCOURAGING, NICE people that aren't going to put you down and start drama? Maybe I got this wrong? :huh:

I honestly think everyone has their heart in the place. But they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Some people may not speak kindly but MEAN kindly when offering adive/suggestions/thoughts

Dispite us all being here for the same reason everyone has a different opinion and some speak it differently than others.

jennajava

This is still the internet and has real people. The world isn't full of people that are going to reach out and hug your soul :flowerforyou:

These are wise words.

LorinaLynn

Great response! When does it get to the point where you feel you have to say something? Like I said, I don't like drama, but if someone is bashing someone else, that's usually when I step in and say something.

If someone is being bashed, report it.

RahBuhBuh

I reserve my snarky comments for people out in the world who deserve them, people who sell donuts, and serial killers.

Carl01

Please also don`t mistake sound advice for being rude or as lack of support.
If a person posts that they are going to lose weight by only eating 500 calories a day,it is more supportive to tell them that is not wise and unhealthy then to wish them luck.

That may be the extreme but it is all about context and intent,those things are hard sometimes to relay in a format like this.

Candida1983

Great response! When does it get to the point where you feel you have to say something? Like I said, I don't like drama, but if someone is bashing someone else, that's usually when I step in and say something.

If someone is being bashed, report it.

Okay :bigsmile: I just started being committed to this site as a NY resolution, so I'm still learning. Thanks!! :happy:

Candida1983

I reserve my snarky comments for people out in the world who deserve them, people who sell donuts, and serial killers.

^^^Hilarious!!

Pocket_Pixi

This is still the internet and has real people. The world isn't full of people that are going to reach out and hug your soul :flowerforyou:

Just have to surround yourself with the people you prefer :] I have a great friends list. Some of the "rude" people can be quite nice when you talk to them more too actually :]

Everything she said.

meltygarden

Rude can be subjective. One person's honest and forthright can be another person's harsh and mean. I tend to be a no-nonsense person. I never intend to be rude or mean, but I do talk to other people like adults who are in touch with reality. If someone wants me to pat them on the head while they are deluding or making excuses for themselves, I try to just shut up and walk away, but it can be hard to judge that one correctly at times.

On the other hand, I'm perfectly fine with people being blunt with me and calling me on my own bs, so at least I'm not a hypocrite about it.

seehawkmomma

I reserve my snarky comments for people out in the world who deserve them, people who sell donuts, and serial killers.

I think your on the wrong site....i heard Craigs List has a Plethora of serial Killers

RahBuhBuh

I reserve my snarky comments for people out in the world who deserve them, people who sell donuts, and serial killers.

I think your on the wrong site....i heard Craigs List has a Plethora of serial Killers

Yikes. I try to avoid Craigs List and Dunkin Donuts. No good comes from either. Props to you for the use of "plethora". Its a fun word!

seehawkmomma

I reserve my snarky comments for people out in the world who deserve them, people who sell donuts, and serial killers.

I think your on the wrong site....i heard Craigs List has a Plethora of serial Killers

Yikes. I try to avoid Craigs List and Dunkin Donuts. No good comes from either. Props to you for the use of "plethora". Its a fun word!

Yeah I thought I'd use my big girl words today. I even wore my big girl panties!

diver71_au

I dont think that people on here intend to be rude - however .....

People need to remember that this is all about making life changes if someone has previously lived on a diet of corn chips and coca cola and then moves to a diet of corn chips and water it still may not be healthy but it is HEALTHIER and is a step in the right direction. I have given up a number of things that previously dominated my diet but have held on to one or two "security blankets" (such as white bread) which while they may not be the healthiest foods are foods that I will eat. As I move on through the program I may decide to change these foods for healthier choices but for now I am coming in on or slightly under allowed calories and I am not blowing out any nutrient area that badly and my exercise levels have increased. I would appreciate people providing SUPPORT rather than having people who have never met me and do not know my history or background telling me that my diet is rubbish. Especially when those same people are not following healthy programs (one person who has challenged my diet choices in a confrontational manner has had three days this week where the total intake was less than 500 Cals and yet they are telling me that my treats (nut muesli bars) are bad for me.

For people like me who struggle to stay with a lifestyle modification program this kind of criticism is the sort of thing that would have previously sent me back to my chocolate and soft drinks. I am stronger now but there are still many people here who are fragile enough that an unthinking comment (no matter how well intended) can derail the whole program.

I am all for advice and guidance but I so not expect to be made to feel like a criminal just because I like the taste of (unbleached) white bread over wholegrain or because I snack on a muesli bar rather than an apple.

This is my body and my program - if I ask for opinions then give them to me. In the meantime please keep opinions to yourself and just show support .