Putting myself out there

time2bhealthy

So, I am normally someone that keeps to myself, but I am really beginning to change my lifestyle. The truth is, I have always struggled with accepting "me". I have struggled with low self esteem my whole life, although I don't know if the people closest to me would really know that. Growing up, I never felt like I was good enough. Maybe that was because of my parents expectations, although I was always a "good" child. Anyway, I am now 36 years old and taking control of my life. The problem I am having is the lack of support from my spouse. Does anyone else have this issue? I love to workout and take care of my body. Although he sees my hard work and dedication, I get comments like "I don't know why you are so focused on getting healthy....you could drop dead tomorrow anyway." I guess he doesn't really understand that I am at least trying to live a long happy, healthy life. I would love if he would try to become healthier too, but there is NO way that is going to happen. I guess I am just looking for advice/support... HELP!!!

FierceFitBeautiful

Hi! I also have struggled with self esteem and "loving myself" my entire life. I too had extreme pressure from my parents, especially when it came to school... but it seemed like I really couldn't do much right -- even though I'm a good kid! In college now and separated from them, I am a bit happier (don't get me wrong I love them to pieces!) but I still can't look in the mirror and say I love the person looking back at me. I don't open up about my weight loss to anyone, because everyone always tells me "You don't need to" "why are you doing that you look fine" which is why I find the MFP community so great! I'm working on my self esteem through getting my dream body and becoming super healthy... hopefully along the way I'll find happiness! Just remember to do this for you, to better yourself, not for anyone else.. it sucks that your spouse isn't interested in helping you, but don't let him bring you down!!

becoming_a_new_me

Not only have I felt like this, I blogged about it and am glad to have it off my shoulders. If you are up for some reading, it is at http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/iddreams

JennieAL

I think it's great you want to change and take time for yourself, get in shape, etc. I think when we make big inner shifts it inevitably wants to manifest outwardly. People close to us have to "adjust" to any sort of significant change... sometimes they don't know what to make of it or expect.

Give him time... maybe he'll come to appreciate the "new" you :-) Good luck! And be proud you are taking control and putting forth the effort.

bcampbell54

He is afraid you are going to become a better person than he is, or he doesn't want to make any changes, or he's afraid of losing you.
But it doesn't matter.
You were the "good" child, and you are still seeking approval from him like you sought it from your parents.
Overcome that by succeeding on your personal journey. He will probably come along too, once he sees your success.