Dear Deployment, I HATE you.

ccano

You may think he isn't a military man because you know him the way you do, but inside of him he still is and he may not show you his work side around you, but a different man. We have our family face and work face.

I met my husband at work. We worked together for a year.

With all due respect, my husband is not a lifer and does not have the mentality that you do. I appreciate everything you are trying to tell me. I am a Marine Brat and was raised by a lifer. I know lifers and I am very familiar with their values and beliefs.

I *KNOW* my husband does not share your feelings about this sense of being a "military man." I know because he tells me this everyday, lol.

I think I missed if you ever mentioned this....
Why did he join?

My husband's family has some problems with money. His mom and older sister strongly encouraged him and his brother to join the military. I know my husband felt like he had to go so that he'd lift a little bit of that financial burden off of his parents' shoulders. The same goes for his brother, who joined the Navy. (It didn't help that they lived in southern California, and to move out on your own over there at 18 or 19 years old is damn near impossible).

Before I knew my husband, I had met plenty of people who complained about the military and I couldn't understand why they had joined. I had that "well, you knew what you were getting yourself into" mentality. But I realized, hey, I grew up around it, but not everyone has. Combine that with recruiters telling you everything you want to hear, and there you have it - disillusionment. lol

My husband realizes (and actually, so do I) that everyone's military experience is different. Some people get great duty stations and get to work for great people, and some people just don't. I used to work with my husband and I can vouch for his work "environment" (i.e. the people he has to work for). It's really pretty awful. Let's just say...when my husband's superiors found out we were dating, they set out to get me fired...and well, they accomplished that. I worked with my husband for a year...

That's an entirely different story. A very long one too. lol. If you ever care to hear it I can share...but otherwise I won't bore you with it. :-P

ChubbyBunny

Ohhhh romantic drama/soap-opera stories!
YAY!
I need more hobbies....well besides recipe hunting!
:laugh:

ccano

Ohhhh romantic drama/soap-opera stories!
YAY!
I need more hobbies....well besides recipe hunting!
:laugh:

lol! Yeah, it is drama-filled, for sure.

It sucks because I've been waiting for the day he gets promoted. Because when he does, he can choose the two people who get to pin the new rank on his uniform in the promotion ceremony. I have been patiently waiting for the day I can stand in front of our naysayers and pin that bad boy on his collar. Unfortunately now it looks like my opportunity will be missed since he will probably get promoted over there. Damn!!!!

ChubbyBunny

That would be a wrinkle.... especially if he's gettin out before another one.

ccano

I suppose it's okay though. The glory is in the gold band he wears in front of them every single day. My civilian boss told me at one point that work romances never last. At some point after we got engaged my hubby came home and told me that my former boss congratulated him on our engagement. Mhm. haha

I realize I might be coming off as kind of immature right now, but oh if you heard the story you would understand why I feel so strongly about this. lol

johnblake

I'm not really sure what to tell you, if your hubby is not staying in. Then your lucky, it will shape your life right now but if it's the last deployment, you'll look back on this and think if you made throught this you'll make it through anything.

Those of us that have to leave our familes behind year after year and miss the first steps the first days of school, the graduations, we ( I mean my shipmates out there) we have support, but the wife's always year after year they come home and be Mom and Dad.
Being the wife of a serviceman is without a doubt is the hardest job in the world.

Make it throught this you''ll have a great life