Hubby is not on the health train!

chaoskitty

My hubby isn't interested in eating salads and healthy meals.

He eats lots of bad food so it's not like I can do the out of sight out of mind trick because it's all over in our house.

How do you deal with not necessarily an unsupporting hubby but one that is supportive of you but doesn't have a desire to change his own habits.

It's frustrating to say the least

ShellGetsFit

When I first decided it was time to really focus on healthy eating and a better lifestyle my hubby wasnt' interested either. He was fine with me doing it, very supportive actually but no desire to do anything to change himself. He has FINALLY hit a time in his life where he is ready. About a year ago he quit smoking which caused him to gain weight and then his position at work changed from a very active one to only sitting at a computer....on went more weight. He only continued to gain weight at that point. It wasnt' until he tried to take off his wedding band and it wouldn't budge that he realized he had to do something! So for the past few weeks he has agreed to eat whatever healthy meals I make, stop eating junk food at work (they order in a LOT, especially on night shift). I've found he even chooses healthy snacks now too! I'm still working on getting him more active but at least the healthy eating is in place. Anyhow, what I'm trying to say is, although it may seem rather hopeless right now, if you continue to eat healthy and speak with him about how good you feel, maybe he'll come around! Most people have a breaking point where they finally realize that it's time! Don't give up!!

lorigreg

I have the same issue and what even harder is that HE is the one that does the majority of our cooking. He is home all day and so it makes more sense for him to cook while I'm at work. I have to make sure that I fill my plate before he does because he ALWAYS over fills it. And I so wish he would exercise with me. It would just make it fun instead of boring. I'm doing not too badly with the food but I have not gotten into the exercising at all and I know I need a partner to keep me motivated.

cramernh

My hubby isn't interested in eating salads and healthy meals.

He eats lots of bad food so it's not like I can do the out of sight out of mind trick because it's all over in our house.

How do you deal with not necessarily an unsupporting hubby but one that is supportive of you but doesn't have a desire to change his own habits.

It's frustrating to say the least

Well - to be very honest... it is not your place to make your husband follow you on this path..

He shouldnt be made to do anything he doesnt want to, nor be coerced into something that he himself should be making that decision.

If he wants to bring home his junk food, he is just as entitled to having it as you are in having a bowl of salad.

Talk with him about how it would be nice if he could please keep it away from your reach - until you can learn not to touch it and be capable of controlling yourself if you dont trust yourself..

But, you never have the right to tell him what he can and cant have. Only he can decide for himself if he wants to do this for himself...

Hellbent_Heidi

He eats lots of bad food so it's not like I can do the out of sight out of mind trick because it's all over in our house.

If you do the grocery shopping, try to cut back on the stuff you keep in the house. If possible, ask him to take his 'bad' snacks to work or something to help keep you from being tempted. If you do most or all of the cooking, you should try sneaking in things that are 'light' and lower fat. A lot of stuff isn't even noticable.

Good luck, and you should definitely talk to him about it! He may be more willing to help support you than you think.

chaoskitty

Oh I'd never tell him he can't HAVE his food, I've never even asked him to stop eating badly.. we just have rotating days that he cooks and I cook. On his days it's Chipotle, or Chinese take out and then every Friday is Pizza Friday.

So... I'm just trying to figure out how to work my own goals into this life so I'm not constantly sabotaging myself.

SWEETS1234

Time to make new trends. Try to find healthier take out choices OR how about make your own pizzas on fridays? My husband never jumped on board my train but I did talk to him about how important this was to me and needed him to help me. So we ended up picking healthier things for me and him adding a few things that he wanted on the side. He always likes treats but he started buying the chips and snacks that I didn't like. So I would be wouldn't be tempted. GOOD LUCK

LeilaFace

Hey,

My husband is a double whammy. He eats fairly well but won't exercise, has a sedentary lifestyle (in the Navy) AND is a amateur Baker. Yeah i get pretty bad food shoved in my face A LOT - spumoni cookies, really?

I don't think you were in any ways implying that you wanted your husband to jump on your health wagon. But as for what to do to stay the course, build up that willpower. My husband always wants to order Chinese or Pizza and it's tough. So I try to stick to cheese pizza and for Chinese food, I usually just get fried rice. It's still not healthy by any means but I could be adding a lot worse stuff. It's become a running joke when I invite my husband to go for a walk with the dog and I or come to the gym.

I agree with the people above. If you do the grocery shopping buy your healthy food and let him get his junk food on his own. That's what I do if my husband wants some chips he's on his own if he wants baby carrots we've got them at home. We keep separate accounts so I'm using my money to grocery shop. But if you don't want to give him that option then just work on your willpower, it's all you can do.

Lona728

I have had the same problem over our 13 years of marriage. There have been times I actually think he was trying to sabotage me! Truthfully he doesn't find me attractive when I am heavy, but he doesn't want me to lose weight either. He thinks if I am heavy, he can treat me however he wants and I won't leave because who else would want me?. This time around he is the most supportive. By that I mean he will sneak junk into the house and when I go upstairs he hands it out to the kids. He thinks if I am not in the room then it is okay. Or if I go to bed, he will put a pan of cookies in the oven. He also hides his junk food all over the house, and then is surprised when I find it while cleaning. lol. Anyway, in the past I didn't have the motivation to resist. Now, I am in a better mind set and am able to resist it. I do all the cooking, so dinner's are always healthy and he now eats them without all the complaining, like he used to do. I have never told him he can't have his junk food. But he is gone most of the day working. Why can't he just eat that crap while he is working and eat healthy while at home? It's not like the kids need candy bars and donuts to survive!

MelsFitLife

I have that problem for both husband and child...but I have noticed that hubby has seen me drop 15 pounds, so he has been working out here lately.Now if he would only get on the food wagon with me !! I have sweets and chips around the house, but its not worth giving up my weight loss and I tell myself that everytime I think I want to cheat. Maybe your success will rub off and they will step up and do it with you.

UponThisRock

Lead by example, you can't force him to change.

Captain_Tightpants

You could do the grocery shopping, then he doesn't have a choice.

Or you could always request that since you are looking after yourself while he isn't that he increases his life insurance significantly so you're not screwed when he pops his clogs on you at 50.

busyPK

My husband is supportive of me wanting to lose weight, but I don't expect him to do the same. He still has potato chips, beer and chocolate in the house for him and I'm not tempted by it as long as I also have healthy snacks on hand that I can grab. I cook dinner at night and he will eat whatever I'm cooking so without knowing it, he's eating a pretty healthy dinner (just bigger portions than me). I am doing this for me and as long as my husband is showing support by what he says then I'm happy.

shana_phoenix83

I'm in the same boat in regards to my husband. I grocery shop, so I don't buy any junk that I know I'm tempted by. I know that he loves to have some sort of snack in the house, so I try to find something that he'll enjoy that I don't care for (e.g. cheez-its). Maybe when your husband buys chinese, ask if he'll also stop by Subway or somewhere else where you can buy something at least semi-healthy. Or, on his days "cooking," have leftovers from a healthy meal you've made the night before or something convenient like a Lean Cuisine. Also, I make sure to send my husband to work with all the unhealthy leftovers for lunch the next day (chinese, pizza, etc). I've learned that I can't have that stuff around the house all day without eating it. Good luck!

jcpmoore

When I had this issue with my husband we made a deal. I didn't complain about his junk food being in the house and he didn't leave it sitting around. He kept it in his study and away from me. If I found a bag of chips opened in the pantry and it tempted me beyond resistance, I would literally just throw it away. If it wasn't opened, I wouldn't open it. If it was in his study, I never saw it so that worked for us. If he brought it out to the family room to munch on, he also took it back to his study when he was done so it didn't sit around. All in all, that worked pretty well for us. It made the "out of sight out of mind" a little more doable.

HTH

shana_phoenix83

Also, in regards to "pizza night," we often make our own pizzas at home. He makes his on dough, and I just make mine on a high-fiber whole wheat tortilla and use low-fat mozzarella with veggies or whatever we have on-hand.

mejustsmaller316

I try to have things on hand i can heat up quickly if i just cant eat what ever junk his is eating, but most of the time we eat the same things we used too, i just eat way less of it. As i lose weight hubby gains weight because he eating what i dont. He dont seem to mind.

debfirst

I too have a hubby who wants to eat healthy and says that he will, but never really does. We, as a family, have always done things together mostly involving going out to dinner and always including drinks.

The other day we went out to our favorite bar and grill. I had of course, saved some extra calories and worked out hard for this night, but once there decided to make good decisions. My husband was bummed that I didn't order a drink or two and even called me a "party pooper". I then made a comment about him trying to sabatoge my hard work. He immediately was hurt and felt very bad.

I wasn't trying to upset him, but now I know that he wasn't trying to sabatoge me, he just had no ideas about how hard it is to stay on a healthy lifestyle plan. Maybe your hubby doesn't either. Let him know exactly how you feel.