Do you know someone like this...?

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2

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  • MrsSullivan08
    MrsSullivan08 Posts: 274 Member
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    I hear ya there. I know several people like this and they are skinny and they drive me crazy!!
  • MrsSullivan08
    MrsSullivan08 Posts: 274 Member
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    haha I had a friend like that in college. She was always asking, "does this make me look fat" and she was a size 4! :grumble:

    One day I snapped and responded back with, "YOU LOOK LIKE A F#@CK$NG BEACHED WHALE! How can you possible consider wearing that in public?! The aquarium called because they're missing shamu."

    She never asked for my opinion again :laugh:

    This made me laugh. lol
  • MiNiMoNkI
    MiNiMoNkI Posts: 447 Member
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    Sometimes when someone looks in the mirror they dotn see what we do! deep routed insecurities come out in all kinds of ways. whatever you do dont make her feel stupid for how she behaves, or tell her shes imagining it, i would tread carefullly, as much as it irritates you, you need to find out WHY she behaves this way
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
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    She's probably just jealous of you and trying to sabatoge you.
  • jmruef
    jmruef Posts: 824 Member
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    Sounds like some serious body image problems going on - how sad for her. Eating disorders definitely affect more than the person going through them - friends and loved ones wind up watching and shaking their heads as the person piles on the self-loathing and self-destructive behaviors...and until they want help, there's nothing you can say that will really hit home.

    So - don't say anything. Redirect the conversations. It's not about how she looks compared to you, it's about how she thinks she looks. If she specifically asks how you think she looks, say "I'm not going to have this conversation because I don't think you're ready to hear me." And change the subject.
  • challengeaccepted
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    I'm wondering, has she ever been overweight before? Maybe she thinks she still looks big like before. Or like everyone else had said she could be seeking attention or have serious issues. Either way I feel bad for her.
  • CannibalisticVegetarian
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    I had a friend like this in college who was maybe about 115-120 soaking wet, and constantly complained about being so gross and fat looking. It hurt my feelings at the time, considering I was (and even with weight loss and STILL) about twice her size. What fueled her though was that she'd gained the freshman 15, and through her eyes, she didn't appear to be, 'paper thin and attractive like all the other girls from her hometown'. I was worried, but things really took a turn for the worse when she confessed to binging and puking. I swear i coulda smacked her.
  • myogibbs
    myogibbs Posts: 182
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    Sounds like a lot of the people you are talking about on here are very insecure with themselves...Sometimes it is attention seeking behavior, but it is fueled by insecurity. Bad attention is still attention. What I would do in this situation is tell her that you are trying to be supportive and there are solutions out there if she wants to change. But, if she doesn't truly want to change, you would greatly appreciate it if she didn't complain about it if she isn't going to take any action to change. If that makes her mad, so be it...you don't need that poison in your life. If she accepts the help, yay!...you have been a good friend. Otherwise, please don't let it get to you..you are taking action and you are brave, motivated and AWESOME!!!
  • kailysimpson
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    It doesn't bother me per say in the sense that I compare her to myself, I think it's the sick irony of conversations with her that revolve around how fat she is. I have tried to be supportive and tell her that she's beautiful and all of that but then she tells me that her husband wants a "fit healthy wife." I have never gotten the impression from him that he puts pressure on her about her weight, and she has never been overweight - other than when she was pregnant, which doesn't count, but she gained almost 100 pounds and took it all off in less than 6 months after giving birth. I guess I worry about her health more than anything, and like I said I have encouraged her to join MFP and she just acts like it's a place for fat people - which is ironic, considering she says she's fat? Sometimes I wonder though, does she have true body image issues, or is she just seeking attention and at the same time attempting to drag me down? My husband says I should blow her off completely, but I hate to have those kinds of relationships with family, KWIM??
  • rbryntes
    rbryntes Posts: 710 Member
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    You can only control your own thoughts and actions,.
  • Legally_Natural
    Legally_Natural Posts: 101 Member
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    Some people do it for attention. Next time she says how fat she is- say " yes you are huge" and then walk away


    That's what I was taught to do. It really shuts them up when you agree with them.
  • Pams_Shadow
    Pams_Shadow Posts: 233 Member
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    2 words..... Skinny Fat

    oxymoron anyone? :laugh: :grumble: :noway:
  • kk0223
    kk0223 Posts: 179
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    Yeah, it sounds to me like she's the attention seeking type. I don't know her. So, I'm sorry if that comes off rude. But, don't give her what she wants! When she talks about being fat etc and you tell her she's not and she needs more food. She feeds off of that!

    She will agree but not do what you say, probably. I would just look at her and not comment. Don't let her think it gets to you or she will keep it up. Just keep a poker face and walk away. Don't give her the attention she is seeking! I hate when people do that *kitten*!

    I don't know but I would kill to be 120 lbs! LOL :D
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
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    Here, try this strategy: BUTT OUT!
    Don't mess with what fit people are doing.

    If she's 120 - more power to her!
    Focus on yourself.

    She'd drive me nuts which is why I don't go around nutty people.
    Just bug off, and leave this girl be.
  • Priincess_Natalie
    Priincess_Natalie Posts: 367 Member
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    It really sounds like she has an eating disorder. She probably also suffers from body dysmorphic disorder. She needs professional help. I feel sorry for her.

    Her weight for her height isn't too low but from the sounds of it she is starving herself and doesn't see what you and everyone else see.

    Please try to get her some help.
  • alwaysinhoth2o
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    Not all, but definitely some people bring up their skinny bods saying they are fat, fishing for compliments, ie "Your not fat! Your way skinny". Some are very vindictive and feel like a better person if they are thinner than their friend. So instead of saying, "Your fat and I'm skinny. HA HA" They just bring attention to their skinnyness knowing it make their friend who isn't as skinny feel less than. MEAN And then like some have said, to bring attention to themselves without actually going around flaunting their body yelling, "Dont you want to be me?"
  • danigirl1011
    danigirl1011 Posts: 314 Member
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    I would tell her "well you can have 4 egg whites for the same amount of calories and be way more full!". She sounds like a person who is going to not ever change unless she actually seeks professional help. i would try to let it go in one ear and out the other so it doesn't affect your stress level.
  • JanineHarrison
    JanineHarrison Posts: 164 Member
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    I don't personally have this problem right now but I have encountered it. I understand your frustrastion. For me, being a rather insecure person myself I don't really get uncomforatble with the fact that skinny people think they are fat, just can't fight the thought of "geez, if they think they are fat they must think I'm disgustiing", when in reality they are so caught up in their own issues they probably haven't even noticed what i look like.

    Just be thankful that you aren't in her shoes and when you get to see results you will get to celebrate what you've done through hard work and always be proud of who you are.
  • heresmyinsidevoice
    heresmyinsidevoice Posts: 311 Member
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    After I read this, it made me think of a really black humor sort of joke I've heard before. If you're not into that sort of humor, please ignore...

    Next time you see her and she's going on about how fat she is, just put your hand on her shoulder and with as much feigned empathy as you can muster, tell her, "You know something? I think you serve as a true inspiration...

    ...for crackwhores to lose some weight."

    :laugh:

    All jokes aside though, she sounds like she has some psychological issues she's dealing with. Whether it's anorexia, bulimia, depression and/or very low self worth, I think the best thing someone like this could be told is that they should seek some counseling or go to their doctor.
  • chelleyr9
    chelleyr9 Posts: 22 Member
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    I do this as well. I am extremely self conscious about my body. I gained 15 pounds and at 135, I was extremely unhappy with my size. Everyone sees themselves differently. I had a coworker that openly said she wanted to slap me for stating that I was watching calories and passed on a hunk of cake. I usually dont advertise that I think I feel overweight, but decided to do something about the extra 15 NOW before it keeps growing. I am so glad I joined MFP b/c I am eating better and realize how horrible I was eating. Once I get back to 120, I just plan to maintain.