How much feedback do you really want on your food diary?

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vzucco
vzucco Posts: 229
in Food and Nutrition
Everyone is on different diets and seeking different kinds of support from their friends, so I wonder, how much feedback do you really want on your food diary? If you have a cheat day do you want to be called out? If you are staying within calorie goals but not getting any vegetables, do you want to hear it?

I like to read about nutrition and sometimes going through people's diaries, it concerns me that they may be losing weight in unhealthy ways. But how do you tell someone that they are not making the best choices without offending or alienating?
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Replies

  • SeaSiren1
    SeaSiren1 Posts: 242 Member
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    I don't offer if they don't ask. But I also don't give them a "great job" either. For me, anyone doing Eat to Live is welcome to comment on my diary. I would encourage feedback in regards to recipes and varying food choices.
  • budgetqueen79
    budgetqueen79 Posts: 310 Member
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    Me personally I don't offer unless they ask. The reason is everyone's body is different. If you see my diary on some days you might pass out or not LOL! Most people say you should eat fruit but I am allergic to all fruit except pomergranate. I'm talking hives, swelling the whole nine so to not have to keep explaining myself over and over I just keep it on private. I mostly eat 3 or 4 different kind of veggies also b/c of the same reason.

    Most people are overwhelmed as it is starting out so when they feel they are getting picked apart on their eating that may just push them over the edge. So when some don't say anything it's not lack of support it's just letting ones find there own way.
  • GurleyGirl524
    GurleyGirl524 Posts: 578 Member
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    I like constructive criticism, it helps me make adjustments. If I have a "cheat day" or "cheat meal" I will either add a note to my diary or comment on it myself.
  • doornumber03
    doornumber03 Posts: 221 Member
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    if they aren't asking or complaining they aren't losing etc.....I don't say a word.....no need to. Most people here know when they make a bad choice and don't need to be called out on it too by their friends. Now if they ask for advice or say i'm not losing weight and i don't know why......then i give my 2 cents.
  • Punkedpoetess
    Punkedpoetess Posts: 633 Member
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    I don't offer if they don't ask. But I also don't give them a "great job" either.

    ^^^ This. I also will unfriend people who consistently undereat on a regular basis. If you are really concerned, you could message them privately in a nice way about their diary. I wouldn't do a public message about their diary. Personally I don't mind constructive criticism when I am screwing up as long as the person isn't mean about it.
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
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    Outside of asking questions about foods so that I can learn (such as "Hey where do you get those?"), then I don't criticize unless I'm asked, for the most part.
  • tangal88
    tangal88 Posts: 689
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    Outside of asking questions about foods so that I can learn (such as "Hey where do you get those?"), then I don't criticize unless I'm asked, for the most part.

    same as above
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
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    Mine is wide open to criticism. Particularly subsitution suggestions. Friend me and tear me a new one. :tongue:
  • iuangina
    iuangina Posts: 691 Member
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    I don't really care what other people have to say if it's nasty. I have days where I go over by 100 calories. I don't need to be critized for going over. I'm well aware that I'm going over and most of the time it's done on purpose (i.e., cheat day, cheat meal, feeling like I need extra calories). I think it depends on who your friends are and what they are asking for when you make comments about their diary. Most of the time I don't comment unless someone asks me to.
  • vzucco
    vzucco Posts: 229
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    Mine is wide open to criticism. Particularly subsitution suggestions. Friend me and tear me a new one. :tongue:

    Friend request sent! lol I don't want to tear anyone a new one though. My policy is pretty much what everyone else has been saying, if people ask I comment, if I notice that they're doing awesome and eating clean I am their cheerleader. If they have a bad day and are feeling discouraged about it, I just tell them that tomorrow is a new chance to make the right choices.

    And I think it's an excellent idea to send someone a gently worded private message if you are concerned about their health.
  • myltlisa24
    myltlisa24 Posts: 242 Member
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    Personally, I like to have someone suggest other stuff - because to me, I think I am doing the best I can; however, I like to hear what about works for other people! Yes, there are days, when I go waay over, and there are days when I don't get enough, but I will call myself on it, like many other MFP friends. But this is what i am here for, to get advice, but not to get rude..if that makes sense. I am here, to see how other people lose the weight..so I look for others to provide suggestions on my diet! :)
  • mattkellett
    mattkellett Posts: 82
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    everyone has different goals and different ideas on how to get themselves there. As a trainer and ex athlete, I am shocked at how little people know about nutrition. No fault of thier own, I know there is a tonne of information out there, and what to trust is a big issue. you need to ask yourself how serious you are going to take your nutrition, is this a diet, is it a change in your lifestyle?, etc...

    I will help anyone and everyone, becuase it is truly what I love to do, I could talk about it all day (wait a second I ussually do), thats why I am so lucky to be in the profesion I am.

    I woud love comments and questions surroundng my nutrition, having someobne look at it keeps me accountable, and we ALL need that.
  • PepeGreggerton
    PepeGreggerton Posts: 986 Member
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    This is something that is frustrating to me and has me considering closing my diary. I intermittently fast and get a lot of people repeatedly telling me to eat more on the days that I do. Which isn't in it's self a big deal. I'm just sick of explaining and defending it. It's my lifestyle choice and I eat plenty the other 5 days a week.
  • Articeluvsmemphis
    Articeluvsmemphis Posts: 1,987 Member
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    people are offended if you tell them the truth, with that being said, I usually wait a while and I say something when I see a post like this.

    "I'm tired of dieting, I see no point of starving myself because I have not loss any weight in two weeks"

    me: *checks diary*

    you're eating 900/1000calories a day?:grumble:

    me: advice given, eat more, ways to eat more, advice on moving more

    simple
  • myak623
    myak623 Posts: 616 Member
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    I leave mine open so that people can critique my food choices. I have no problem with someone telling me to stop eating this or eat more of that.
  • docsallen
    docsallen Posts: 159 Member
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    If I ask for feedback/opinions/criticism/suggestions, then be as brutally honest as you would like.
    If I am doing something blatantly wrong and complaining that I am not losing enough weight, etc., then I would appreciate it if you would let me know.
    If someone is randomly searching and reads my diary, then if you feel that you have some helpful suggestions, offer a couple of them nicely.
  • tenoclockbird
    tenoclockbird Posts: 36
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    I like feedback if it's honest and gentle, and given in the spirit of helping. My journal is open to friends and I'd love to have some more opinions, so send me a friend request! I think I finally have enough history to see my own patterns, so anybody who wants to friend me and have a look, I welcome suggestions. I particularly would love more suggestions on keeping my protein and fiber intakes high without adding carbs and calories.

    Bird
  • LabRat529
    LabRat529 Posts: 1,323 Member
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    For me, it depends on who they are, what they're telling me, and how often they're telling it to me.

    Example of something "okay" (this actually happened): A recent new friend suggested I really focus more on eating my macros and that I maybe not add back my exercise calories. He gave me this advice because I was whining about not losing weight. I totally appreciated his advice and his approach. I was not offended at all, because he was respectful, and more importantly, his advice was smart and reasonable. I may or may not follow his advice- my problem right now is will power and not knowledge- but he was still cool for giving me the suggestion and I was grateful.

    Example of something not "okay" (this has never happened): Someone might look at my diary and see that I occasionally eat hot dogs, Burger King, and drink soda (yes, I even drink the kind with sugar in it). If they were to say "you really need to start eating clean", I'd ignore them. I have no desire to eat clean. This diet game is hard enough without me making it harder for myself by insisting I eat nothing but organic protein, carbs, and fats. Here's the thing though- I wouldn't be mad about the advice. I'd just ignore it. I'd only get mad if they kept hounding me on it.

    So... I guess the moral of the story for me is, if you're going to critique my food diary, go for it! If it's smart advice, I'll try to follow it to the best of my ability. If it's not for me... well it's just not for me and I expect people to accept that and move on.
  • vs1023
    vs1023 Posts: 417 Member
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    I leave mine open so that people can critique my food choices. I have no problem with someone telling me to stop eating this or eat more of that.

    Same. I'm not perfect, but if there are ways to be better I'd love suggestions!
  • ItsMeRebekah
    ItsMeRebekah Posts: 910 Member
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    I like feedback if it's honest and gentle, and given in the spirit of helping.
    This!! Mine is open but dont beat me up please! Nobody is perfect.

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