Has anyone ever had this happen to them??????

YouAreTheShit

I don't disagree with anyone that you should report the guy. Sometimes, that's best.

The truth is, he likes you. Regardless of the fact that you're married, he is flirting with you.

Everything he is doing is classic 3rd grade playground stuff, which can get him into trouble in the workplace.

On the playground... it's classic "boy likes girl" stuff...

It's the male (pea)**** spreading his feathers and wanting the hen to kaw at him.

Captain_Mal

Sounds like you work with a giant *kitten*.

HauteP1nk

This guy sounds like a complete idiot...lol At first I was going to say that maybe he had a crush on you because some men are very immature and tend to pick on the women they really like...however, his behavior is kind of bordering on harrassment and insanity!

I would ignore him...or, if it persists I would approach him or his manager. He shouldn't be making you feel upset or uncomfortable at work.

KYMUSE

Definitely like the idea about keeping a diary, but I'd also start with emailing HR to ask about a time when you can come in and talk to them about a situation with a coworker. Print the email(s) out and save them-gives you a dated paper trail as to the times you've tried to rectify the situation. Sadly, I've known situations like this where HR swept it under the rug and having that paper trail strengthened their case.

rileamoyer

Pretty cut and dried 1) He has given you the finger 2) grabbed his butt in front of you = inappropriate behavior, bording on possible sexual harassment

Talk to HR immediately. PS: I am an HR manager with over 15 years experience. This is not a subject to be treated lightly.

anchorageb2

Well Unfortunately I have learned that HR will do nothing till you have voiced your unapproval to him atleast 3 times. So the next time he does it be very loud and say "Thats innappropriate I do not think I have done anything to deserve that kind behavior." This will draw attention to both of you. He will either escualte it to where everyone can see what kind of work he is or he will stop. The more witnesses to his behavior the better. Or you can do the opposite and just pretend you do not see him or hear him after asking him to stop and reporting it to someone higher up.

If most of the times he does this is when you two are alone in a room you need to be very vocal voicing your opinion of not being left alone with him at any point. You never know someone may finally break down and tell you what he is thinking you did.
I hate when people try to say OH he likes you because guess what? NOT EVERYONE will like you. Sorry just does not happen not even for Jesus. What that guy was doing was not some school boy crush that was being spiteful and mean. He either thinks he is defending someone by thinking he is revenging them or He really just does not like you. If your the only one who has the issues with him they may see you as the problem. Learn how to deal with it because in your field you are gonna see it a lot! Not everyone will be happy about being clean or they way you handle them and others will hear something you did and treat you different for it.

elgo1819

If you don't want to take the HR step immediately, the way I handled a similar situation (except it was another guy), is just look him square in the eye, and ask if he has a problem with you professionally.

It doesn't need to be aggressive, insisting, or rude. It's the workplace. He needs to respect that.

All else fails, HR.

rileamoyer

I would, also, DOCUMENT every occurance. You should, if you feel comfortable, tell him to stop and document that as well. Each company has a little different internal policy as to how to report. Look in your employee hand book (if you have one). Documentation is the key.

mikeyml

It sounds to me like this guy is pretty immature and for whatever reason he is treating you like one of the guys. He probably views you as safe when it comes to being crude or quirky. What is the work environment that he's in?

Believe it or not....psychology. We're an insurance company for mentally ill/drug & alcohol addiction

Wow, I was not expecting that one! lol

The real question here is: Do you feel threatened or abused by this guy? If you feel like this guy has malicious intent and is purposefully degrading / mocking you, then by all means keep a diary and report his actions to HR.

When I read your original post, my initial thought was "this guy just thinks he's funny." I've had guys treat me this way because I'm a guy and that's how a lot of immature guys act. Only you know if he is trying to be a funny guy or if he is being a bit evil. Hope that helps.

bigdawg025

First things first... you need to tell HIM face-to-face to stop. It has already gone too far. If you don't address it to him first there is a chance that HR won't take your claim seriously until it's too late. Once you have asked him to stop... then if he continues his behavior then it's time to go to HR. It wouldn't hurt to set up a meeting with them anyway, but they will almost certainly ask you if you have told him to stop doing what he's doing.

This guy sounds like a real douche canoe. I think he does like you in some sick twisted way... like the 3rd grader on the playground as someone else commented.

TheRoadDog

I don't disagree with anyone that you should report the guy. Sometimes, that's best.

The truth is, he likes you. Regardless of the fact that you're married, he is flirting with you.

Everything he is doing is classic 3rd grade playground stuff, which can get him into trouble in the workplace.

On the playground... it's classic "boy likes girl" stuff...

It's the male (pea)**** spreading his feathers and wanting the hen to kaw at him.

I am going to have to respectfully disagree. Unless you are in 3rd grade and can have your best friend pass his best friend a not ein Gym Class, this is a pretty good example of a bully. He may be exhibiting some kind or flirtation, but if he is, he has some definite problems.

I don't ordinarily advocate going directly to HR, but, in this case, I don's see an alternative. You are in no position to approach him. He f*cked up. He has to deal with the consequences.

Maryaly40

I'd like to thank you all for your input. From some of your answers, I feel like yea, it's the third grade stuff. I don't feel threatened or in fear. However, when the opportunity arises I will let this guy know that he has crossed the line with some of the things he says. The only reason I haven't spoken up til now is I wasn't sure how to read into it. If after I confront him, it doesn't stop, I will go to HR. Thanks again everyone

wellbert

He likes you, in a creepy, childish way. He may seem harmless, but...

Go straight to hr, do not pass go, do not collect $200
Hostile work environment + sexual harassment.