Why is life so depressing?

kerrilucko

Sometimes I think the whole world is just TOO messed up.

Last night a grade 8 student that my fiance teaches hung herself. Her Grandmother found her this morning. She was only 13. She wasn't a bad kid, she wasn't being bullied at school. She had been living in foster care and was only recently placed with her Grandma. How sad. We're all just circling the drain. I'm so depressed and I didn't even know her.

kerrilucko

Sometimes I think the whole world is just TOO messed up.

Last night a grade 8 student that my fiance teaches hung herself. Her Grandmother found her this morning. She was only 13. She wasn't a bad kid, she wasn't being bullied at school. She had been living in foster care and was only recently placed with her Grandma. How sad. We're all just circling the drain. I'm so depressed and I didn't even know her.

pipinana

Oh my goodness, the poor soul. I don’t even know what to say to help you feel better Kerrilucko…. Other than that I am so sorry. 13….. So young. Too young. May God Bless her, and help her Grandmother through this hard time.

:brokenheart:

jenken99

maybe there was some issues no body knows about, it is hard outthere for kids to bad there wasnt more people these kids can talk to.my nephew hung himself 4 years ago and i still cannot understand why, life cannot be that bad you would not think. so sorry.

KatWood

I know exactly what you mean. Even listening to the news can be so heart breaking. All the death and violence. However, you need to keep things into perspective. Tragedies are reported much more often than happy uplifting news. And it seems that the bad stuff has so much more of an impact on us.

I'm sorry about this young girl. It really is a shame and scary and sad to think she really belived taking her life was her only option.

réalta

i am sorry to hear that, my thoughts are with you and her family :flowerforyou:

KatWood

Often youth suicide is connected to things like bullying. You hear about all these highschool kids hurting themselves and other, and I just wish before it would get to taht point someone would grab them by the shoulders and tell them "It will get better", "Highschool does END", "You will be an adult some day and the fact that Suzy called you a dork won't matter", etc

I guess when you are young you really lack perspective. It's hard to see beyond your life and pain at that moment.

hartkid13

That's horrible. My thoughts are with your family and hers.

Sometimes this place is really messed up.

tashjs21

:brokenheart: How sad.

kerrilucko

yes. it is especially bad here (for anyone who doesn't know I am living on an Aboriginal reservation for the next few months, where my fiance is a teacher) there are a lot of awful things that go on here- child abuse, neglect, rape, drugs, and alcohol are rampant here. we have even seen arson and murder since we've been here- and this is a SMALL community of about 1600 people.

I have no doubts that this girl had serious issues, it just depresses me that this is how life is

I can't even imagine having a child, raising them to be a teenager and walking into their bedroom to wake them for school only to find them hanging there... I can't think of anything worse. Sorry, I am just depressed.

kerrilucko

Often youth suicide is connected to things like bullying. You hear about all these highschool kids hurting themselves and other, and I just wish before it would get to taht point someone would grab them by the shoulders and tell them "It will get better", "Highschool does END", "You will be an adult some day and the fact that Suzy called you a dork won't matter", etc

I guess when you are young you really lack perspective. It's hard to see beyond your life and pain at that moment.

I agree about bullying but this definitely wasn't an issue of bullying. Bullying really doesn't happen here. seriously, it's one odd thing that we noticed since coming here. ALL the kids are friends. It's so odd. Maybe something goes on outside of school but it would surprise me.

arewethereyet

Sorry Kerri, {{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}

kerrilucko

OMG I SO did not mean to put this in success stories. I'm such a tool.

kelli_panzera

:brokenheart:
I'm so sorry to hear that. My oldest daughter is 13 in 8th grade and it kills me. I spent most of my life suffering from severe depression, and most people didn't even know. We have our kids in schools that are overcrowded and don't have enough resources to be able to get to know them properly. The kids that are stars get all the attention and the ones that need the attention don't get it because they feel like they're not "good" enough. Life is hard, and even harder for kids with problems at home. I know that growing up i'd come across an adult every now and then that picked up on the fact that I had a real problem and try to help me out...but as the world gets faster nobody has the extra time to take a look around and notice something out of place with a kid...they sometimes just write it off as "they're just teenagers". The part that makes me feel like crying is that this was still just a baby that didn't have enough skills to cope with whatever had devastated her so badly. I should think that if she had been in foster care there would have been a counselor or case worker that could have noticed signs that things weren't going to good. Maybe no one else had a chance to know her enough to recognize she had something wrong, and thats so sad. I hope that anybody that reads your post ,Kerri, has enough heart to go and hug their kids, try to talk to them, and remember that even the hardest exterior of that kid can't reflect how fragile they really are and even if they have a problem we think is silly, it could cause them to make a decision that could alter the rest of their lives. And if you have a kid, a brother or sister, or anyone in your life that you love, you'll know that a decision like this will alter the rest of your life as well. I'm gonna go tell my kids that I love them and cry it out in the bathroom for a bit.

pipinana

yes. it is especially bad here (for anyone who doesn't know I am living on an Aboriginal reservation for the next few months, where my fiance is a teacher) there are a lot of awful things that go on here- child abuse, neglect, rape, drugs, and alcohol are rampant here. we have even seen arson and murder since we've been here- and this is a SMALL community of about 1600 people.

I have no doubts that this girl had serious issues, it just depresses me that this is how life is

I can't even imagine having a child, raising them to be a teenager and walking into their bedroom to wake them for school only to find them hanging there... I can't think of anything worse. Sorry, I am just depressed.

Oh Kerri, Please take care of yourself there.... You obviously have a very big heart. You and your husband! Don't be sorry about being depressed.... You have a pretty good reason to be upset, and coming here for some cheering up and advice and to let off some steam is probably what will get you through the next couple of days.... Well besides talking to the hubby. We are here for you.....

{{{{{{{{{{{HUGE HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}

ttoombs

There is also a game some kids play where they cut off their air supply and then release it to get a quick rush. Some do it by hanging, others by wrapping something around their necks. Most do it with a partner but every now and then they do it alone and end up hanging themselves. It's so sad to think that children are so bored or dissatisfied with their lives that they think of ways to harm themselves. They tend to only think in the moment they are in and not the long term affect on themselves or family members. My prayers go out to all children no matter what age they do have more problems with peer pressure than I ever had. Don't know if I could raise my kids in today's society. Thank God they are grown and on their own.

lulubar

That is so sad. Prayers for peace for you and your husband and all the students and the family of this young girl. :brokenheart:

There are no words to soothe the pain when a child dies - under any circumstance and there is no wisdom which answers the question "why?".

Blessings for you sweetie. Do not try to bear the weight of the world, but live in such a way that you might lighten the burden of another...:flowerforyou:

Tri_Dad

Kerri I am really sorry to hear about this and the effect it has had on you. :frown:

I know at times like this it feels like the world is a horrible place and you are left with so many questions. I have lost three close friends in the last five years in very tragic fashions, one car accident and one house fire, and one suicide. The suicide was a shock and she left a 6 year old son behind so I know how you feel. I went through alot of the same emotions and I really felt like the world was a place not worth being in. But you have to remember that their is a certain balance to things and for every tragity there is a miracle. For every husband and wife that give up there are two young people like you and your fiance that are truley in love. For every death that comes to soon there is a life that begins with a baby's cry. For every person with hatred in their heart there is a person with love to spare. Kerri, I know right now the night seems to be at it's darkest but please try to see the light on the horizon. Try to see the beauty in the world for it seems to me that you are one of it's good people and I would hate to see one of the world's lights be consumed by darkness. Blessings to you and your fiance during this difficult time. Look for the good in the world around you. It's all over the place.

:drinker:

MOMOFTWO29

Sorry to hear that. I will keep her family in my thoughts and prayers, and you and your fiance as well.

mfpme

Sorry to hear that Kerrilucko. It's ok you posted this in Success Stories. You're shaken and depressed and feeling vulnerable and reaching out for comfort. We here at mfp understand. Wishing for you and your fiance and the girl's family lots of comfort and strength right now. How sad how very sad. Suicide no matter what age is a very sad event and for those left behind a traumatic experience. Only 13 poor girl and her grandparents and her classmates. We're here for you. Take very good care. It's ok to be depressed you're griefing the loss of a very young life through the most tragic way of dying. Your emotions reflect your empathy for her and her loved ones. Please remember to take care of #1, yourself.

indianagranny

Kerri, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your fiance and the girl's family.

kerrilucko

Thanks to everyone that posted after I left yesterday. It is nice to have such supportive people here, eveen when dealing with life's tougher issues.

My fiance and I had a long talk about it last night, we're both just really upset with how the school is handleing this (more like NOT handleing this) they are pretty much just looking the other way, and we both agree that they really should have some sort of crisis response running. there were a LOT of kids hurting yesterday and I have seen suicide copycatting in high schools before. But nope, they are doing nothing. Brian says they did a prayer for her over the PA at school yesterday but that they didn't say her name and that they would not acknowledge her as a student at the school (I guess she had been having attendance problems this semester- but up until early February she had attended regularly so uh, she WAS a student. They don't like taking responsability here and I just think it's awful. Sorry for venting but seriously, it's a BIG deal in a small community and kids should have proffessionals here to talk to and all the school cares about is some stupid fishing trip the kids are going on today. I'm so angry :explode: and they figure if they downplay it just until today's over that they won't have to deal with it because next week is Spring break, and they think, I guess that people will just forget about it. Who forgets that? these kids will remember this for their whole lives.

Anyway, I am done with my vent now, thanks again to everyone :flowerforyou: