When is it enough?

This question goes out to anyone who might be nearing the end of their weightloss journey. Granted, better health is a lifelong commitment, but the specific goal of losing pounds should (eventually) come to an end. And my question is: How do you know when you've reached that end?

I haven't hit the weight goal or size goal I originally set for myself (I was hoping to be comfortably in a size 10 - I'm still lingering around a 12-14, depending on the store). I am just at the border of what is considered medically "healthy" for my height. However, people all around me are telling me that I am DONE. I'm definitely not recieving the same support from my friends and coworkers that I once did. When I mention that I have 10 more lbs to my goal, they ask me "Are you sure?" And given how EXHAUSTED I am after steadily losing weight for 3 years, I'm asking myself the same thing.

Thoughts? Advice? Opinions? I don't want to be a quitter, but I don't want to batter my body towards an unrasonable goal either.

Replies

  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I think you are done when you reach the point where you are happy enough with how your weight and what you need to do to maintain it long term that you have no desire to do more.
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    If you're exhausted, wouldn't you say that means you're either doing something wrong or that there just is something wrong?

    Doing something wrong could be any number of things - incorrect or too much exercise, not enough cals, poor food choices despite caloric deficit, poor sleep hygiene etc.

    Something just being wrong could be any one of even more things - from managable issues like thyroid problems, gluten intolerance, fibromylagia etc. to more serious things like apnea or diabetes.

    So if you're sure you're doing everything right, maybe get checked up by your doc?

    Hope you feel better soon!
  • tangiesharp
    tangiesharp Posts: 315 Member
    Congratulations on (almost) reaching your goal!

    I'm at the same place. Only have 8 pounds left from my original goal. I bought new clothes recently so my weight loss is more visible. But, I wanted to be down one more dress size to go. That was my original goal and that's what I'm working towards.

    How do you feel? Do you want to lose more weight? Maybe you can change to maintenance for a while and see how your feel before you decide to lose any more?
  • MandieBellie
    MandieBellie Posts: 39 Member
    I think you are done when you reach the point where you are happy enough with how your weight and what you need to do to maintain it long term that you have no desire to do more.

    ^^ Agree, but would like to add... I personally want to be in the middle of the normall BMI range. That way when I am maintianing if I gain or lose a few pounds here or there I wont be in the over or under weight range.
  • ahinski
    ahinski Posts: 200 Member
    People tell me not to lose any more weight too, because I don't "need" to. And if I never lost another pound, I'd honestly be perfectly satisfied; however, I still may or may not lose more weight because I intend to continue to eat healthy and exercise regularly. Honestly, sometimes I think people say to stop losing weight because they're jealous or they're afraid I'll get thinner than them. I'm sure you know a few people like that. If you are on the high end of what is considered medically healthy, I would suggest seeing if you could continue to eat healthily and still lose weight, but if you continue healthy eating and stop losing weight (and don't gain), then your probably exactly where your body is comfortable. If you're still not satisfied with your physique then consider a new, more rigorous workout routine. Good luck!
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,519 Member
    Losing weight can be a mental grind. Take a few weeks, or even a few months, completely off of dieting, and then decide where you want to go from there. You'll be in a lot better frame of mind to decide what you want to do.
  • ahinski
    ahinski Posts: 200 Member
    If you're exhausted, wouldn't you say that means you're either doing something wrong or that there just is something wrong?

    Doing something wrong could be any number of things - incorrect or too much exercise, not enough cals, poor food choices despite caloric deficit, poor sleep hygiene etc.

    Something just being wrong could be any one of even more things - from managable issues like thyroid problems, gluten intolerance, fibromylagia etc. to more serious things like apnea or diabetes.

    So if you're sure you're doing everything right, maybe get checked up by your doc?

    Hope you feel better soon!

    This is a very good point. You shouldn't feel exhausted from losing weight--you shouldn't feel anything energized and rejuvenated!! Have you ever seen a nutritionist or had a personal trainer? You might need to re-evaluate how you've been going about weight loss.
  • shakybabe
    shakybabe Posts: 1,578 Member
    I was originally trying to get down to 9st 3 (129lbs) cos thats what my Wii fit said I should be for my height and I wanted to complete the game.

    I was 12st 7 last June and I've dropped 2 and half stone and now 10st (140lbs).. I would like to see '9 st something' looking back at me when I get on the scales so trying to lose at least another 2lbs to get into the 9st range, but I don't know if I want to go down as far as 9st 3.

    My problems is I've lost a lot of weight of face, neck etc but not as much off tummy so that's not completely flat even though I have a waist now and gone down 3 sizes.. just getting into most 14's now (from UK size 20)

    I'm 42 and have thyroid problems too so I wonder if 9st 3 is unrealistic if I'm always going to have that tummy pouch. As a long-term wheelchair user, we also tend to develop whats known as 'quad belly', from tummy/core muscles that aren't used as much as I'm sat in wheelchair all day I have managed to shrink it from 48" to 35 but I don't think I'll reach my goal of getting both waist and tummy to 30".

    I'm tempted to give fat burners a try to see if can get another 7lb off and shrink my tummy by another few inches.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,319 Member
    If you aren't lifting weights on a regular basis, start.
  • SwankyTomato
    SwankyTomato Posts: 442 Member
    For me? It is inches really.

    I need to exercise and tone more than lose weight actually.

    When my gut is not hanging over my pants then I know that I am "there".
  • ahinski
    ahinski Posts: 200 Member
    Losing weight can be a mental grind. Take a few weeks, or even a few months, completely off of dieting, and then decide where you want to go from there. You'll be in a lot better frame of mind to decide what you want to do.

    Can you be more specific about your advice to "take a few weeks, or even a few months, completely off of dieting"? I think without a proper explanation, this could be construed as a recipe for disaster (no pun intended). Do you mean that she should take a few months off of eating a diet with a caloric deficit?
  • ahinski
    ahinski Posts: 200 Member
    If you aren't lifting weights on a regular basis, start.

    This is important advice. You may have lost muscle mass through dieting (it's bound to happen), and if you try to eat more in order to stop losing weight, you're more likely to gain weight. Having more muscle mass speeds up your metabolism big time.
  • DisneyMommy
    DisneyMommy Posts: 281 Member
    I wondered this too when I reached my first goal weight of 140 lbs. So I decided to lower it another 10 to 130 lbs. When I passed 130 lbs, I decided I was satisfied with how much I had lost at that point. So now my weight hovers b/t 127 - 130 lbs and I'm good with that. Now I am working on more strength training to get more definition. I think knowing when you are "done" is just a personal decision. For me it was more how I looked in the clothes I wanted to wear and not what the scale says but the scale can be helpful if you start to creep back up at all. Good luck!
  • drnerdgirl
    drnerdgirl Posts: 1 Member
    It's hard to know. If it's about numbers on the scale, it can all be so complex. I know that I feel MUCH better when I'm doing weights with my workout regimen and that gives me the body shape that I'm really striving for. I weigh a bit more, since muscle weighs more, but it eats fat. :) I still have LOTS of hangups about the number on the scale, but I try to remember that it's about health and body composition. Where did you get your goals? Did you discuss them with a doc or someone else who is fitness-savvy?
  • There were SO MANY positive insights posted here, I can't seem to find time to address them all. But this response, in particular, sums up many of the conclusions I've come to:
    ...if I never lost another pound, I'd honestly be perfectly satisfied; however, I still may or may not lose more weight because I intend to continue to eat healthy and exercise regularly. Honestly, sometimes I think people say to stop losing weight because they're jealous or they're afraid I'll get thinner than them. I'm sure you know a few people like that. If you are on the high end of what is considered medically healthy, I would suggest seeing if you could continue to eat healthily and still lose weight, but if you continue healthy eating and stop losing weight (and don't gain), then your probably exactly where your body is comfortable. If you're still not satisfied with your physique then consider a new, more rigorous workout routine...

    The bottom line is that I am NOT satisfied with my size, neither am I satisfied with the way I feel physically. My goals for myself were very carefully chosen based not only on the BMI tables, but also on my own experience with my body. And I should not abandon those goals based solely on the opinions of others. That being said, the fatigue I feel indicates that something I'm doing is innapropriate or that something is wrong physically. I will now begin working with my doctor and valuating what can be done. Thanks!