Children's Bad Habits

HappyHeart1993

First let me say that I realize where my children got their bad eating habits. However, having said that, I am working very hard at changing my own habits, trying to set a good example for my two children.

My son, a junior in high school, does at least get the benefit of being in Athletics, where he gets at least an hour of activity each day...before he comes home and eats a big snack, then goes and sits for hours at the TV/computer/Xbox.

My daughter, on the other hand, is 11. Our school district decided several years ago that our elementary school kids don't need PE every day. No, PE is in the rotation with Art and Music, so she only has PE five days out of every 15. She is also a boredom eater and an emotional eater (now that part she did NOT get from me). She has joined the gym with me, voluntarily, but now it's like pulling teeth to get her to come with me. (I told her she could quit, but she says she doesn't want to.) There's always an excuse: my head hurts, I have homework, I have a hangnail, etc.

I have been overweight my whole life, and I can clearly recall how hurtful (albeit well-intentioned) my mother's words were when I was my daughter's age. "You have such a pretty face" meant, "But the rest of you is hideous". "You'd be so pretty if you lost weight" meant "But until you do, you should be out chasing cars". I don't want my daughter to feel the way I did, particularly in light of her emotional motivation for over-eating.

I'm looking for really good suggestions on how to motivate both of my children, but particularly my daughter. She is a bright, beautiful, brilliant, compassionate, funny girl, and I don't want the bad habits I've taught her to harm her any more than they already have. I know how cruel kids (and adults, too) can be to "the fat kid". I want more than that for her.

I appreciate any suggestions you can offer.

bcattoes

My suggestion is to limit the number of sweets, chips and other unhealthy foods and TV/xbox/etc. time your children are allowed each day. I think this should be true whether or not the children are overweight. Focus on health rather than weight. Don't tell your daughter she can't have another sweet because she's overweight, tell she can't have it because it's unhealthy. Keep plenty of healthy snacks on hand and few unhealthy snacks.

amuhlou

Maybe you both can take some time to find an activity she particularly enjoys? Maybe it's gymnastics, dance classes, or swimming, basketball, or something else? Sometimes you have to try a couple things before you find something that suits you. I had a brief stint of playing soccer when I was 12 but it turned out to not really be my thing.

I started ballet classes when I was about 10 (late compared to the 'dance moms' who have their kids in at age 2) and I really loved it. By the time I was in high school I was into tap and jazz too and dancing at least 4 days a week. I didn't realize it then, but now I know it helped keep my weight down.