Why men are more intimidated in gym...
thefuzz1290
Posts: 777 Member
I see all these threads about how women are intimidated by the men in the gym, and they shouldn't be. Do the women not realize that its more intimidating for a man to walk into the gym for the first time than a woman? In evolutionary terms, a man is supposed to be strong, fast, and fit, which is why a lot of beginners who start lifting get hurt (ego wise or physically).
A woman walks into the gym and sees a guy benching 225lbs (2x45lb plates on each side), she doesn't automatically think "Oh I should be able to do that," and then try to load up the bar with more weight than she can handle. She may avoid the free weights, but she isn't comparing her fitness level to that of a man.
However, a man sees another man benching 225lbs, he knows instinctively that he is the weaker, less dominate male. This intimidation factor is hard to overcome since typically the man is the head of his household and has not been challenged. However, out in the gym (or out of his comfort zone), he has a biological need to establish dominance. This biological need leads many men to lift more weight than he can, to show the other men he is capable of challenging their dominance.
If you don't believe me, just watch around the beginning of January with the first time men in the gym. You will typically see two main types of beginners (men) in the gym:
Type A lifters - those who feel the need to challenge for dominance, try to lift too much and leave in frustration, or try to lift too much and get hurt.
Type B lifters - those who are more submissive naturally and won't make eye contact with the stronger of the men, and you'll see them over at the circuit machines (avoid the free weights like the plague).
This is why men need to check their egos at the door and realize that they're the cub in the lion's den and it takes years of hard work to challenge the leaders, but when they do they'll be accepted into a lifting brotherhood. This is also why women shouldn't feel intimidated at the gym by the men, because the men aren't comparing their fitness level to yours.
(On a side note that doesn't flow with my post, its more intimidating for a man to see a woman lift more than he is than it is for a woman seeing a man lift more than she does.)
A woman walks into the gym and sees a guy benching 225lbs (2x45lb plates on each side), she doesn't automatically think "Oh I should be able to do that," and then try to load up the bar with more weight than she can handle. She may avoid the free weights, but she isn't comparing her fitness level to that of a man.
However, a man sees another man benching 225lbs, he knows instinctively that he is the weaker, less dominate male. This intimidation factor is hard to overcome since typically the man is the head of his household and has not been challenged. However, out in the gym (or out of his comfort zone), he has a biological need to establish dominance. This biological need leads many men to lift more weight than he can, to show the other men he is capable of challenging their dominance.
If you don't believe me, just watch around the beginning of January with the first time men in the gym. You will typically see two main types of beginners (men) in the gym:
Type A lifters - those who feel the need to challenge for dominance, try to lift too much and leave in frustration, or try to lift too much and get hurt.
Type B lifters - those who are more submissive naturally and won't make eye contact with the stronger of the men, and you'll see them over at the circuit machines (avoid the free weights like the plague).
This is why men need to check their egos at the door and realize that they're the cub in the lion's den and it takes years of hard work to challenge the leaders, but when they do they'll be accepted into a lifting brotherhood. This is also why women shouldn't feel intimidated at the gym by the men, because the men aren't comparing their fitness level to yours.
(On a side note that doesn't flow with my post, its more intimidating for a man to see a woman lift more than he is than it is for a woman seeing a man lift more than she does.)
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Replies
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Good points.
I just know I'm faster than most of those gorillas. :laugh:0 -
Good points.
I just know I'm faster than most of those gorillas. :laugh:
But you found a way to establish your dominance :P. I'm a slow white boy, so I won't have that problem.0 -
Good points.
I just know I'm faster than most of those gorillas. :laugh:
But you found a way to establish your dominance :P. I'm a slow white boy, so I won't have that problem.
Seriously though, I do find myself comparing what others do to what I can do, but I just remind myself that they have likely been at this one activity much longer than I have. Give it time, and you may benching the same amount.0 -
Good points.
I just know I'm faster than most of those gorillas. :laugh:
But you found a way to establish your dominance :P. I'm a slow white boy, so I won't have that problem.
Seriously though, I do find myself comparing what others do to what I can do, but I just remind myself that they have likely been at this one activity much longer than I have. Give it time, and you may benching the same amount.
Exactly the point I was trying to make. I was one of those Type B lifters when I was a beginner. I never touched a free weight (mainly because the gym I went to was populated by bodybuilders and pro-wrestlers lol). Finally I decided to get serious and was going to the gym where I never saw anyone doing squats or deadlifts, so I had no one to compare to :P.0 -
So is that why my other half gets nasty that I can walk faster than him while carrying our 42lb kid for half a day without breaking a sweat and he can't do it for 5mins? Doesn't encourage him to get any fitter though0
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Hmm I never really thought of that xD True though!0
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Hmm I never really thought of that xD True though!
You intimidate me, because it looks like you can squat more than I can lol....stupid long legs (*excuse*).
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My boyfriend hates that I can run longer and faster than him so he wont run with me anymore lol. Woman are intimidated for other reasons. Its mostly because society has made us all have low self esteem because of the images of what we "should" look like and there are nice skinny little defined woman at the gym and if you dont look like that you get upset because you dont look like that. Damn us woman0
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I compare myself to other people too. Damn does that make me an alpha male? I haven't even hit the menopause yet!
Seriously, this kind of casual sexism is the reason i loathe the pop application of evolutionary psychology.0 -
My boyfriend hates that I can run longer and faster than him so he wont run with me anymore lol. Woman are intimidated for other reasons. Its mostly because society has made us all have low self esteem because of the images of what we "should" look like and there are nice skinny little defined woman at the gym and if you dont look like that you get upset because you dont look like that. Damn us woman
See its understandable for a woman to be intimidated of another woman, but I see posts about women being intimidated by the men at the gym more than the women. And unfortunately, society these days makes you believe you should be an anorexic stick figure, not a fitness model. Give me Jessica Biel over Lindsay Lohan.
On a side note, I'm off to the gym (getting there late) and I know the unknown power lifter is going to be there (he's there around 0200-0300 EST). Time to go leave my ego at the door lol.0 -
I compare myself to other people too. Damn does that make me an alpha male? I haven't even hit the menopause yet!
Seriously, this kind of casual sexism is the reason i loathe the pop application of evolutionary psychology.
Its not just psychological, its biological. Its inherently within us as living breathing mammals. Now we may have evolved past butting heads together to show dominance, but its still part of being alive.0 -
I compare myself to other people too. Damn does that make me an alpha male? I haven't even hit the menopause yet!
Seriously, this kind of casual sexism is the reason i loathe the pop application of evolutionary psychology.
Its not just psychological, its biological. Its inherently within us as living breathing mammals. Now we may have evolved past butting heads together to show dominance, but its still part of being alive.
sigh.0 -
I am a member of a women's gym. What intimidates me about the blokes in the gym is that a gym I used to belong to, they used to congregate around the machines close to the entrance to the group fitness room to perve. I'm there to work out, not to pick up. Especially not those kinda guys. Gross.0
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I compare myself to other people too. Damn does that make me an alpha male? I haven't even hit the menopause yet!
Seriously, this kind of casual sexism is the reason i loathe the pop application of evolutionary psychology.
Its not just psychological, its biological. Its inherently within us as living breathing mammals. Now we may have evolved past butting heads together to show dominance, but its still part of being alive.
sigh.
You can't accept that we're essentially animals? We may be more advanced in some ways, but in the end we still exhibit the same ingrained behaviors as most male/female mammals. Can you break out of them? Of course, that's part of being human, but it takes a conscious effort to break apart from ingrained behavior.0 -
Women aren't intimidated in the gym because they feel they need to compete fitness wise, they feel intimidated because of the thinner, prettier, younger women and think everyone will look at them and think they are fat.0
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You are only racing yourself. If you come in and compare yourself to the guy whos been lifting for five years, you'll always come up short. If you come in, ask the guy whos been lifting for five years for form check, stick at it for say 3 months, and then compare your starting stats to your current form, you will see you have outclassed yourself. Who gives a **** what the other guys are doing.0
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The only person that ever intimidated me at the gym was the mat hog I encountered on Tuesday... That lady was downright scary!
Men don't intimidate me.. mainly because I have a whole host of personal trainers watching over me and anyone that tries to mess with me gets shut down.
Women can be intimidating... but I mean, there will always be someone that is skinner/prettier/taller/w/e than you... it's a fact of life. If it doesn't bother you outside the gym then why would it bother you inside the gym?0 -
I'm intimidated of the 'boy' side of the gym because I don't know what I'm doing.0
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I go to the gym for me. Not to impress anyone but myself. Yes once upon a time I would have done so. I guess I grew up. As long as I go to the gym and have a good work out regardless of how much I lift or how long I run for I'm happy. I don't know anyone at the gym and don't intend to know the,, maybe just a polite hello and that's that. I think we should all stop looking at theses steroid pumped men in mags and the skinny lady's too. Where all different and I know one thing. I'm me ! I don't want to be like anyone ells. Some may not agree with me but after all we all have our own opinion. :-)0
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Women aren't intimidated in the gym because they feel they need to compete fitness wise, they feel intimidated because of the thinner, prettier, younger women and think everyone will look at them and think they are fat.
Not from what multiple forum posts say...there are several saying they're intimidated by the men lifting weights.0
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