Family resists healthy cooking choices

pavlinm

To make a story short, I am currently having issues with my dad who I currently live with and can't move out because I don't have a job. I decided to make some better choices for myself because I want to kick my food addiction patterns and eat less processed foods. He is 70 years old and currently takes blood pressure medications and is diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. He eats 3 heavy meals per day and his diet mostly consists of red meat, lots of bread and salad and sweets. I can tell he avoids cooking because he never learned how to cook proprerly and considers it unnecessary burden that women should take care of.

I am not here to tell him what to do with his weight and what to eat but I feel he resists some of my choices. He even verbally abuses me about cooking every day because in his opinion you should not be cooking much if you are overweight. He also complains about the amount of dishes and sometimes refuses to eat left-overs. For example, I decided to quit adding extra salt into meat loaves for example, stopped using bourbon cubes and sour cream and such. Supposedly it takes some time to get used this way of eating and to wean-off artiicial sweeteners and other additives that improve the taste of food. The food might taste plain at first but eventually you start to like it that way.

So my question is how do I set up my boundaries with my dad and why is he giving me such a hard time while I try to make the whole family better? He even started buying his own good like chocolate and ham because he feels I am not taking care of him good enough? My way of dealing with it is to leave him alone but sometimes we get into an argument when I confront him about some of his behaviors. He's so freaking defensive and insulting whenever I bring up his behaviors. I told him not to buy sweets for me and to keep them away from me if he does and told him I want him to cook when I am gone for most of the day because he's home a lot. Part of me thinks it's a control issue and that he does not really want me to lose weight although he tells me on several occasions I am fat. Also, I believe he might be going through some kind of food withdrawal himself and that he is afraid of making big changes himself. Anybody else has dealt with issues like that and did it get better over time?