New here-hello everyone!

Soapstone

I've been logging in my calories/exercise regularly for a little over a week now and it's helping me a lot. I was somewhere around 193 after the holidays, and really want to get back down to 145, which was my normal weight from the age of 14; I rebounded very fast after my first child, and never lost the weight after I had my daughter at 28. I am about to turn 34, getting into my mid-thirties and I just want to be healthy! I also smoke (around a 1/4 a pack a day for the last couple of years- I've weaned myself this far and am having the worst time cutting the rest). I've been a smoker for 17 years and it scares me! After a few serious attempts to quit in 2011, I decided that I should concentrate on exercise and diet, and am hoping to bring the smoking issue into alignment with my lifestyle. I hope it works; I want to be here for my kids.

I've never been much of an exerciser-EVER. I've never gone to the gym regularly until recently, and I am very intimidated by the gym culture. I go to the local community center instead of the brand-new, enormous gym in my area- it's quiet and there's only a few people that use it, though I think I'm the only one under the age of 80! I go in in my beat up shoes and my work out clothes, sweat my a** off and go home. There's a great view of the the Columbia River from the ellipticals, so I just stare out at the river while I'm sweating-very meditative for me. One thing that has really hit me hard in the last few days is that I can't go further with my workouts if I smoked on the way to the gym (yes, I know, I know); I literally can't get the oxygen that I need to increase the resistance on the machine. So I don't smoke first thing in the mornings anymore-it's a step in the right direction.

I've never been a health-conscious eater, either. I keep trying to write about my habits in the past, but it's kind of upsetting; I've never really paid that much attention- I guess I was an unconscious eater. For many years, I smoked and drank coffee throughout the day, then I would eat (a lot) at night. Slowly, I moved to less cigarettes, a little less coffee, a meal or two during the day, and a lot of snacking during the night, sometimes late nights. Then, I gradually moved to incorporating a high-powered, healthy meal once a day or so, to where I am now. I still drink coffee, but I drink a lot more water (usually with a little cranberry juice and lemon juice-tastes so much better!). I'm eating better but I still have my moments.
My biggest change to date (besides weight loss, muscle gain, improved mood and willpower) is SLEEP. I've been going to the gym and hitting the elliptical, HARD 5-6 days a week and I sleep like a baby now. I've been a chronic insomniac since I was a child. It makes me feel FANTASTIC to be able to sleep so regularly. No one ever told me the cure for it was EXERCISE...who would have thought! I also feel like a superhero after cardio workouts, which I DID NOT expect. I didn't expect exercise to be the easy thing for me, but it is. Diet is harder, so far.
Anyway, I've been hovering here all week, so I thought I'd enter my rambling introduction-thanks for listening!