Stupid telemarketers...

Cberg9
Cberg9 Posts: 123
edited November 2024 in Chit-Chat
My fun way of dealing with telemarketers at work:

Jason: After doing a quick search I see that there are 864 buyers who are looking for a Realtor in Melbourne, FL
Me: We don't want buyers
Jason:.....(confused pause) ok well since you don't have a need for our service then have a nice day!

and another...
Al:We all have printers and need cheaper ink am I right?
Me:We don't have a printer, we just buy the paper and color the stuff we see on the computer on it
Al:......(confused pause) ooookkkk k....uummmm(searching through his script to deal with this objection)
Nothing, I get hung up on...YES!

How do you get through your boring day?

Replies

  • NicolePatriot
    NicolePatriot Posts: 621 Member
    LOL. I put them in parking for about 30 seconds and then they just hang up! Score!!
  • Cberg9
    Cberg9 Posts: 123
    LOL. I put them in parking for about 30 seconds and then they just hang up! Score!!

    Great! Maybe next time I'll just breath into the phone receiver really hard while they are trying to talk...stop when they pause to see what the heck that was...then start again when they talk :) So fun!!
  • QueenJayJay
    QueenJayJay Posts: 1,079 Member
    The latter made me LOL!

    I like to tell them I'm busy, but if they give me their home number, I'll call them back later this evening, around 11 or 12.
  • Pams_Shadow
    Pams_Shadow Posts: 233 Member
    I pretend the phone cuts out... it goes something like this....

    TM: Hello, may I speak to X?
    Me: This is she.
    TM: I'm with XX company I'd like to speak with you regarding our nice new almost free pain in the *kitten* program.
    Me: Oh that sounds great, can you tell me more?
    TM: Sure... blah blah blah
    Me: Hello?
    TM: Yes, hello.
    Me: Are you there? I can't hear you.
    TM: Yes, I'm here. Can you hear me?
    Me: Hello?
    TM: Yes, hello.
    Me: I can't freaking believe he/she hung up on me. That's so rude.
    Click! :love:

    Yay! Love doing that, they get so frustrated. :laugh: :laugh: :bigsmile:

    Oh and they always call back right away. So I answer the phone, and just keep saying hello until they hang up or until I get tired of saying it. Hahaha! Evil aren't I?
  • becoming_a_new_me
    becoming_a_new_me Posts: 1,860 Member
    We play the transfer game and keep passing the person around until they hang up
  • Cberg9
    Cberg9 Posts: 123
    YES I love all of these! Especially passing the phone around, Unfortunately I work in a small office, just me and the boss lady...They are always calling for her and I know she is too busy to talk to them so I am allowed to *kitten* with them hehe MAYBE I can try with fake accents and just pretent to pass the phone. Man I think I have too much time on my hands...
  • princessputz
    princessputz Posts: 283 Member
    LMAO! I love it! I'm trying that with the next person who calls....
  • Ephena
    Ephena Posts: 610 Member
    This is really mean of me but I deal with 25+ telemarketers per day so it gets hard to be friendly and perky when they won't stop pushing...

    Them: "Can I talk to (now deceased and has been for over 5 years president of the corporation that owns our company)?"
    Me: "Only if you can hold a seance, he's dead"
    Them: CLICK!!!!!

    I actually had sales people show up at our company looking to see him one day. I pointed to the commemorative picture we have hanging in the lobby and said "there ya go", they left really quickly after that for some weird reason. :devil:

    I also have tendency when somebody asks if so and so if there or available to say: "Sometimes..."

    This is in addition to all the calls I get for people that work here but they don't have the persons name correct, people that no longer work here and haven't for over 5 yrs, people from our parent company that is not in the same building as us (or even same zip code). :grumble: If you don't have their name correct (pronunciation is excluded because we have a couple really hard ones), have current employee names or even have the right phone number I am not going to let you talk to anybody!
  • rachelleahsmom
    rachelleahsmom Posts: 442 Member
    These are great! I hope I remember them when the time comes. I'm usually just rude and tell them I don't have any interest in talking with them and then hang up. Or, I say something like "I'm not sure why who I am voting for is any of your business."
  • 1996gtstang
    1996gtstang Posts: 279 Member
    i usually set an appt for them to call another day/time and when they do set another appt, set another appt over and over and over. might as well waste the companies time and resources
  • muwchck
    muwchck Posts: 261 Member
    Those are some great options. I just might try some of these sometimes. Now I don't work in an office setting, so they actually usually have exactly who they want when they call my phone, but I'm bad about passing them off to one of the "men of the house" and let either my 5 year old talk their ear off, or let the baby babble into the phone until they hang up.
  • G30Grrl
    G30Grrl Posts: 377 Member
    I had one call Wednesday when the receptionist was out, and I was the only person still in the office to answer. They launched into a spiel about how they were calling from such-and-such a service because according to their research our customers had rated us an average of 4.75 stars out of 5 on Google, and--

    I cut them off with "We don't have any customers." (This is actually true; we are a mineral exploration company)

    The telemarketer stammered a bit, then said "I'm sorry, I have the wrong company," and hung up.
  • CashierCantin
    CashierCantin Posts: 206 Member
    Telemarketer: Hello, are you interested in updating your old drab siding on your house?

    Me: Why yes, yes I would, please do tell me what you offer.

    Telemarketer: Blah blah blah (goes into his whole written speech that goes on and on and on). "When can we schedule a consultation?"

    Me: As soon as possible

    Telemarketer: That's great. Can I have some of your information?

    Me: I sure hope you guys can get this done really fast, like by next week fast.

    Telemarketer (sounded really eager now): Hmm, not sure we can do it that fast, but we can probably get to you within the next few weeks.

    Me: Oh, that's not going to work. I was hoping you can get out here and get this done by the end of next week. I visit my bankruptcy lawyer then to start proceedings and I was hoping to include this with it

    *click*

    Hello? Hello?
  • beltran_y
    beltran_y Posts: 9
    Oh my goodness... thanks for the laughter folks!!! I get these calls all day long, every day of the week. I work for a professional organization so I cleverly adopt a very dense and blatantly unter-trained alter ego (whose name changes daily) and pretend to take their contact information for someone else to return their call.
  • Helenatrandom
    Helenatrandom Posts: 1,166 Member
    Three options...

    1) When they mispronounce my name (they always do), I tell them there is no one here by that name. " My name is Mrs. Atrandom, may I help you?"

    2) When they ask me how I am, actually tell them. It's not a problem if I tell them about TOM, is it? I mean, they DID ask...

    3) Quickly tell them I'm not in the market for buying ANYTHING and hanging up. I consider getting off the phone with them quickly a kindness, since it keeps them from wasting their time as well. The only kinder option would be to buy what they are selling, and I'm not that nice. I usually hang up while I'm still wishing them a nice day (afternoon, evening...). Hanging up while someone else is speaking is rude, but according to Miss Manners, hanging up on oneself is always acceptable behavior. (I don't actually want to be rude... They are just people trying to make a living like anyone else. Unfortunately for them, we find these phone calls annoying. I bet they wish they had a different job, too...)
  • lpatterson327
    lpatterson327 Posts: 71
    lol its gonna suck when you guys are heading towards medicare, hoping i will be working mainly by referrals then :laugh:

    actually better yet, hoping i will be a manager in charge of all the agents and i wont have to actually make any calls for appointments lol
  • stebs1984
    stebs1984 Posts: 38
    My personal favorite:

    Some company called the place I worked at after a big hail storm went through. They were calling and offering some "infrared scan" to look for damage. The girl that answered the phone put the person on hold and found me on the intercom, I told her to tell them that we weren't interested. She came back on the intercom a moment later and said the people were saying that I didn't know what they were offering and that if I know what they were offering, that i'd be jumping all over it. I got on the phone and told them that I infact owned my own thermal imaging camera and had already checked out the building and the insurance company had already looked the place over as well and to have a nice day. The girl in the office couldn't stop laughing!
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