Dating question men!..please help!!!!

chicklidell
chicklidell Posts: 275
edited November 10 in Chit-Chat
Here goes, my best friend has been dating this fellow for 2 weeks, they see each other almost everyday for lunch, this weekend he's taking her to see Star Wars 3D, they are both total star wars nerds...she wants to make him a build a bear dressed as Darth Vader as a gift, she thought it would be cute. He hasn't given her anything yet, no flowers...no nothing, pays for lunches and all...but no gifts have been exhanged. Is this a stupid thing to give a man?? he's 28 she's 34. or is it cute...is it too soon? should she wait? I think she should just do it..she wants to , it's harmless and Ithink it's rather cute...some of our other friends think she should wait for him to gift first, or that it's a juvenile gift..I think she's unique..i'm not into stuffed animals but have to say that would be pretty cool and show she's thoughtful..who says youhave to wait for the man??? Any ideas on this...I hate when I'm wrong!! lol and I think she should do it, cause she wants to.
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Replies

  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
    I think it is awesome!!! Give him the bear forget about any so called rules. Do what feels right!
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    I'm not a man... but I think it's thoughtful but too soon. If he's a Star Wars nerd, he's going to love it but maybe wait a couple of months or so.
  • rammsteinsoldier
    rammsteinsoldier Posts: 1,552 Member
    I think it is a great idea. Who wouldn't love a teddy bear Darth
  • kimoRUN
    kimoRUN Posts: 325 Member
    Naw...that's a cool gift, especially since you say he's a SW nerd. No need to wait. No rules. I'd rather have Chewy though, but that's just me.
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
    online-dating-youre-doing-it-wrong.jpg
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    Naw...that's a cool gift, especially since you say he's a SW nerd. No need to wait. No rules. I'd rather have Chewy though, but that's just me.

    hahaha! she can choose btw a storm trooper and Darth Vader...haha! he likes Darth maul, which they don't have!...but it's build a bear!! only two choices! we're here right now...trying to figure this out!!!! lol
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    Do it. They are going to go see Star Wars so there is a common interest there even if I never bought into such movies. 2 weeks a bit early for either to be overly concerned about who bought gifts, etc. but I think under these circumstances it is a harmless gesture.
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    online-dating-youre-doing-it-wrong.jpg




    HAHAHAHAHAH!! thank god she didn't meet him online!! lol
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    Do it. They are going to go see Star Wars so there is a common interest there even if I never bought into such movies. 2 weeks a bit early for either to be overly concerned about who bought gifts, etc. but I think under these circumstances it is a harmless gesture.

    I agree...it's not a ring...no commitment, just cute.
  • lakersfan4life
    lakersfan4life Posts: 322 Member
    Do it. They are going to go see Star Wars so there is a common interest there even if I never bought into such movies. 2 weeks a bit early for either to be overly concerned about who bought gifts, etc. but I think under these circumstances it is a harmless gesture.

    agreed
  • tbresina
    tbresina Posts: 558 Member
    I say give it.......adorable but non committed gift!
  • Trail_Addict
    Trail_Addict Posts: 1,340 Member
    I see no reason in having to play by some so-called rules of "waiting". I say be yourself, and if she wants to give him a cute gift, she should. Hell, if they're seeing each other every day, odds are they're probably giving each other more than a teddy bear. :wink:
  • SilverStar18
    SilverStar18 Posts: 53 Member
    They are both adults, so screw `the rules`!! I don`t think it`s too early for a little bear, it`s a super cute, very thoughtful and unique gesture. They obviously like each other and have much in common, so celebrate that! :) Hope he loves it when she gives it to him!
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    I see no reason in having to play by some so-called rules of "waiting". I say be yourself, and if she wants to give him a cute gift, she should. Hell, if they're seeing each other every day, odds are they're probably giving each other more than a teddy bear. :wink:

    omg!!! :blushing: :devil: :smokin: if she is...she's not talking!!! lol
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    Do it. They are going to go see Star Wars so there is a common interest there even if I never bought into such movies. 2 weeks a bit early for either to be overly concerned about who bought gifts, etc. but I think under these circumstances it is a harmless gesture.

    I agree...it's not a ring...no commitment, just cute.

    This!
  • Just_Kevin
    Just_Kevin Posts: 1
    I don't believe there is any harm in giving him a bear modeled after a shared interest as long as it's given no strings attached and it is not extraordinarily expensive.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    I don't know any men who enjoy Build-a-bear.
  • MandaJean83
    MandaJean83 Posts: 675 Member
    I say give it! It's sweet and thoughtful but not overbearing!
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    I don't know any men who enjoy Build-a-bear.

    neither do I ..but I still think it's pretty cool..even if it ends up as a chew toy for his dog..who's named after a star wars character (Sidious) ..I think the fact that it's a build a bear isn't a factor as much as it's a star wars bear.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    I agree with Contrarian ... there are SO MANY Star Wars related trinkets she can buy ... and IMO a teddy bear is kind of an intimate gift to give an adult you've only been dating two weeks.

    Buy him a pez dispenser or a tee-shirt, and save the stuffed animals for 1] when you're sure he would even appreciate a stuffed bear and 2] you've been banging for a while.
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
    I think it would be cool but for the fact that it wasn't something she just walked by and say, "Hey, that's cool!". It almost seems like she's trying too hard.

    But then again it is Star Wars so sure why not.
  • chicklidell
    chicklidell Posts: 275
    I think it would be cool but for the fact that it wasn't something she just walked by and say, "Hey, that's cool!". It almost seems like she's trying too hard.

    But then again it is Star Wars so sure why not.

    We're all at the mall now...she caught a glmpse of the star wars bear in the display..that's what started this whole mess!! lol..say yes cause it's impulse?? we're still debating it!!! lol moved onto the coach store...but she wants to go back!
  • Alexandrosrh9
    Alexandrosrh9 Posts: 23
    Spontaneity is the key. In my experience, when people think too much about something, you lose that sense of anticipation and "what the heck" mindset. Your friend needs to remember however, that us guys dont think like girls do. Obviously she feels comfortable enough for a gift after only 2 weeks. Yes, they are Nerds but now highschool kids. She shouldn't be dissapointed if he reciprocates in a way that she did not expect. Again, she should just enjoy the moment. Thats just my humble opinion.
  • trackerrtom64
    trackerrtom64 Posts: 5
    A girl once gave me a tazmanian devil after only a few dates...I loved it.
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    I got a stuffed bear from a girl I was dating once. TBH, it was a little creepy. Now if it had been a vintage talking GI Joe, that's another thing entirely! But, since they are Star Wars fans, might i suggest these?
    StarWarsactionfigures.jpg
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Is he going to have to carry it around all night?
  • carrotstick2012
    carrotstick2012 Posts: 161
    The key in a relationship is to 'be yourself'. If you want to give a bear from the heart and it feels right, do it. For some people it might be too soon or some guys might not like it. But it might fit well for your own way of doing things and he might find it ok.
  • jrich1
    jrich1 Posts: 2,408 Member
    If it was me.. I would love getting something like that from a girl!
  • Fitgirlrocks
    Fitgirlrocks Posts: 21 Member
    I think it completely depends on the personality of the two people involved. Most women would love to have a teddy bear, but my thoughts are, "I'm not 12". :) So see it all depends on the person. There isn't a right or wrong about it. If he hates it and thinks it's too soon and runs away, then maybe that's a sign that he's a jerk. If he accepts it with gratitude and appreciates the spirit in which it's given, then he might be a keeper.
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
    I agree with Contrarian ... there are SO MANY Star Wars related trinkets she can buy ... and IMO a teddy bear is kind of an intimate gift to give an adult you've only been dating two weeks.

    Buy him a pez dispenser or a tee-shirt, and save the stuffed animals for 1] when you're sure he would even appreciate a stuffed bear and 2] you've been banging for a while.

    :noway: What a teddy bear is an intimate gift? i used to get that crap all the time all through out school and i NEVER viewed it as intimate. They have been seeing each other EVERY DAY for 2 weeks and are going on a movie date to the movie. Clearly both are big star wars geeks and im sure he has all the other trinkets and will love a teddy!

    GO FOR IT i say! its a funny gift . If he doesnt like it then he is a little full of himself... he IS taking her on a movie date to see star wars!!
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