Eating my emotions ...

apriljack

I have been doing really well over the last month lost 10lbs. I have seen major improvements with my lifestyle change, I feel better and I have more energy I have even been in a better mood so much so that my family has noticed th changes. Then yesterday life got very stressful thanks to financial issues stemming from my ex-husband (funny how they never really go away). Immediately all my hard work and dedication went out the window. First thing I did was look for something to eat. This has been and issue before I either over eat or totally lose my appetite. I know that I can't be the only person that has this problem. Any advice would be a great help.

Life isn't going to get any less stressful anytime soon as I am getting ready to go back to court against my ex husband to revoke his rights and gain sole custody of my children. I am hoping that knowing that things are getting ready to be an emotional roller coaster will help me be able to combat the emotional eating and stay on track.

nickyherg

I eat my emotions as well. I had a tough day at work and finally sit down last night to relax and all I wanted was junk food...ugh I need self control.

fatboy235

I to have that problem with food, although not all the time. As a kid when things were bad we would be self medicated with ice cream or some sort of snack. I to had a not so great day. Weighed in and lost a whopping tenth of a pound this week. That contributed to a rough day at work and the first thing I did was grab some crackers and mike and ikes. One of my friends just said treat each day like its a new beginning. It happened so get over it and get back on track. I hope you both are able to do the same. Good luck!

stormtrooper73

sounds more like an excuse to eat junk food....now i dont want to come accross as been harsh in that statement so hear me out.............if you eat junk your metabolic rate is low and you feel sluggish and DOWN...which in your situation is not nice for you and can also lead to bad places........but if you still eat right your attitude will be more positive and therefore the nob jocky that is your ex wont get you down so much........anyway i wish you all the very very best....stu (stormy)

RachelT14

I think it takes time to get past this point, just log it and move on to the next better day, dont let your ex influence the great work you are doing.

I dread the school holidays for the same reason the stress of 2 children bickering all day usually sends me to the junk food but yesterday for the first time since i started on MFP i didnt do that. I made a camomile tea and grabbed some grapes! I never thought i would get to this point.

addmorecloud

Congratulations on doing so well! I am an emotional eater too (stressed, happy, sad, bored, frustrated).

It might sound weird, but if you feel a binge coming on imagine your ex is there watching you. Use this as motivation to do something healthy instead. Sometimes brushing your teeth helps to get rid of the chocolate cravings, or even better do for a walk or run and kill two birds with one stone. Or call a friend, or come on here! Anything but eat!

Concentrate on how great it will feel when you are looking damn good and moving on with your life without him.
Keep up your great work!

snookumss

I am on a strict diet, with very specific macros and carb amounts. Today my pet had an emergency vet trip, to find out she has huge cancerous growths and its entering her lungs. She only has a few days.

Trust me, I looked straight to the chocolate. Its really just a matter of saying no, as soon as you think of grabbing for something. Don't let yourself have a little, cause you wont stop!

In the past I've grabbed a cookie and eaten it without even realizing I'd wanted it. I am such an emotional eater its crazy, you really have to just do the best you can and find a way to distract yourself from the sugar/junk food when you want it so bad.

kolakross

What you need to do is find ways to channel your feelings. This is very induvidual, but I try to exercise and keep busy when I feel like I'm close to falling back on food.
I also make sure than I'm not hungry and thirsty, since that makes it easier for me to turn to food. And if I'm close I try water or a fruit instead of chocolate and bread.

Try to eliminate the stress in your life that you can.
Meditating and yoga had helped me to find a better balance in life too and it helps.

It has been a struggle for me and it took a long time for me to realise that I was an emotional eater, but knowing is the first step. Stop and think instead of eating directly. Talk to people about your emotions instead of holding them inside of you. You will probably have some set backs on the way, but that's okay. If you do: Use it! Make sure you put everything in your food diary and ask yourself why you ate it and what you can do differently the next time.

Never use food as a punishment or a treat for yourself (at least until you've gotten full control over your eating).

And always remember that we are all here for you if you need help on the way! Good luck!

ampy34

so hunni you sound just like me and seemingly we share a very similar life. having learnt how to manage these times for me involves sweet fruits like pineapple and strawberries. if you want to eat then eat just eat the right kinds of foods. if you want to avoid eating then get busy. you know that job that needs doing that you've been putting off.......do it! when times were at the there worst for me i started to paint. kids rooms first and eventually the whole house making our home feel like mine and giving it a revamp that would normally would have been left to him, i suddenly discovered i could do it better than him! and talk to anyone who will listen because if you let it all out (how your feeling) the desire to eat will be less intense.

hope516

Emotional eating has always been my issue. I even had an ex-boyfreind tell me that he didn't understand why I was overweight because I eat NORMALLY...but he never saw the binges. The moments when things get a little hectic, stressful, or even just boring I would stuff my face.

I think the first step is realizing that you have this issue. I didn't really realize that my only downfall was emotional eating. I finally realized it and it has helped. If you are conscious (sp) of it you can control it. Just try to stop yourself when you start eating and ask yourself why you are eating?...If it is because you just had a stressful moment then stop, if its because you are hungry then enjoy your meal.

I think that realizing you have this issue will help you control it. Just take it a day at a time and most of all I hope you finally get rid of that stressful ex once and for all :flowerforyou:

apriljack

Thank you all for the wonderful words of encouragement. Knowing I am not the only one helps. I love the ideas that ya'll gave. I have already decided that today will be a better day and that yesterday is the past and doesn't matter anymore.

aprilgicker

If you feel that eating is your emotional crutch, then you will have to make sure all of the things you like to eat are out of the house.
Your kids don't need that junk either. If you need a sweet fix buy sugar free cool whip, your favorite fruit, and some plain greek yogurt. mix the coolwhip in the yogurt and top with berries. Cook better things when you want to eat instead.

Cooking can help slow down your need to eat it all, your hands are busy, your mind is on the recipe, and you smell your food.

Here are things I find that calm me down before I emotional eat.
cleaning and marinating meat for the meals for the next few days.
cutting up fruits and veggies for snacks
banding my spaghetti
baking things like banana bread/ (cookie flats for the kids add dark chocolate chips)
making chocolate cupcakes (look up libby's pumpkin recipe)

Something else that is odd for me that helps is:
I pick a part of my house that is quite and clean it. Strange I know, But I like to think I am scrubbing away my ex's face

And if you do slip, just burn a few more cals for the next week. remember it is the average of a few days that can make all the difference.

bellavie23

Honestly Im going through a divorce and I too am a emotional eater, Ive done good not doing it this time because I keep telling myself I will not add yet another reason for me to be unhappy to the list, gaining all my weight back would ultimately make me unhappy, and it isn't worth it in the long run. We too are about to have a lengthy custody battle, which sucks, but just try and keep in mind over eating wont make you happy either. As for the loss of appeitite, well I am forcing myself to try and hit 1200 calories each day, it is hard, I just forget to eat or dont think about it, so cant help there, but I am doing a much better job not emotional eating this time around, I refuse to let someone else give me anymore reasons to be unhappy than they already are. Good luck girl, I feel for you.

laura789a

I have just realised that I am an emotional eater!! and had never realised it, I can see myself in everything you are all saying, recently ive taken up craft projects and find that helps me stop eating (sewing, ragging, anything that keeps my hands and mind busy) and believe it or not looking at pictures of food and planning meals stops me from actually getting up and making it!

I eat when im tired, bored, hungover, sad, lonely, unhappy, I eat to socialise and any combination of any other emotions. For me its about learning to eat to live not live to eat! but that is hard........

gildinha

I hear you! I have the same problem and even if I realise that I'm a emotional eater I still can't control myself. I really liked reading all the answers you got ... I'll try to apply some to see if it works for me. I definitly can't have anything in the house, if I know it's there, I'll eat it!! I'm new on MFP ... hope like someone said that it will get easier with time ... Good luck to you my friend!

bellavie23

And when I do get the urge, I tell myself to drink a cup of water first, and normally that helps me lose the urge, or if it still persist, I eat less because I already feel fuller.

cloud2011

Congratulations on doing so well...sounds like you're going to continue to do well even after this small bump in the road. I think that's the hard part...when you're trying really hard and something throws you off course.

I'm right there with you. Yesterday, I received a very impersonal email from my sister, about my mother's estate. This issue has been unresolved since my mother died, 3 years ago and my sister has alienated nearly the entire family with her attitude and her actions (and sometimes inaction). But I decided a few months ago, I'm about the future and not the past, even when she chooses to be difficult (or nasty, as she was toward my brother). It hurts me, because I thought I was closer to my sister than this. She is unable to understand that we are all grieving, too, and this is not about her alone.

It's hard to keep going, even when others are trying to pull you down! That's why we're all here. We can say to each other, keep going, it can be rough, but you can do it!

So...keep going, you can do it!

HMD7703

Understanding that you have an emotional crutch in food is important. We need to admit it before we can cure it. I think finding other ways to deal with emotional ups and downs is very hard; maybe the hardest part of my journey thus far.

You are doing well. Just stay focused.

Good luck
:flowerforyou:

dyannajoy

Journal your feelings! Write the SOB a letter and let it alllllll out!! Tell him what you REALLY wish you could say to his face! Do some kickboxing and imagine where and who you are kicking LOL! We use FOOD to STUFF our FEELINGS..........when instead what we really need to do is FACE/FEEL our FEELINGS! face them.......feel them..........face them........and I promise you they will go away and the food will no longer be needed to medicate. Been there....done that.........that is how I ended up overweight. It would take a book to tell you why.......but trust me......stuffing our feelings will only keep us fat! And we stuffed our feelings..because we did not know safe ways to FEEL. Find what works for you.....(journaling/crying/screaming/exercise/pounding pillows/etc) and the urge to stuff will become less and less.....and you will become who you were meant to be! BEAUTIFUL and FULL OF LIFE! May you find your PEACE and JOY!!

BAMFMeredith

This isn't to sound rude, so please don't take it that way, but see a therapist.

I started seeing a counselor about a year ago, not because I have any major psychological issues, but just because I thought it would be good to have somebody to talk to. And it has really helped me get to the root of the real issue when it comes to emotional eating. It's not about the food, it's about something else inside. Once you can get to that problem and learn how to manage and cope with the internal issues you have, you will be able to look at food in a different way.

I realize it can be really expensive to see a therapist, but there are many counselors who work on a sliding scale or take insurance, and many counseling centers have "junior counselors" who are basically graduate students getting their masters (or sometimes phds) in psychology, behavioral counseling, etc. They don't have to be the greatest therapist in the world, but having an objective person who can help you gain some insight is totally worth it.

Although I struggle with my weight, I can honestly say I am completely happy with who I am as a person and no longer feel that emotional attachment to food. Good luck!!!

dyannajoy

"It's not about the food, it's about something else inside"

Yes Meredith.....thank you! Seeing a therapist is something i have done off and on the majority of my adult life.......I think EVERYONE should have someone in their world that they can say anything too and then walk out the door and leave it there . Thank you for sharing your wisdom and understanding with all of us today!