How do YOU see yourself?

72lori

This came up when I was talking to a friend of mine. Your perception of you. How you see yourself.

Example:
When I started I weighed 200 pounds, wore a size 16, but honestly, I didn’t feel like I was hugely overweight, sure I didn’t feel small either, but I didn’t perceive myself as obese, yet clearly I was. When I saw pictures I would get upset over my size, but I didn’t FEEL that big. When shopping for clothes I would hold up something that looked huge and be surprised when indeed it was too small.

Now, I’m in the high 150’s, wearing a size 10. I don’t feel any different. I can’t see the changes most of the time. Sure in pictures, comparing them I see it, but the day to day, it’s hard to see. I hold up clothes that look small and think they will never fit, yet they do.

Do you ever get to a point where you can see yourself for the size you really are? If so, how do you get there?

72lori

This came up when I was talking to a friend of mine. Your perception of you. How you see yourself.

Example:
When I started I weighed 200 pounds, wore a size 16, but honestly, I didn’t feel like I was hugely overweight, sure I didn’t feel small either, but I didn’t perceive myself as obese, yet clearly I was. When I saw pictures I would get upset over my size, but I didn’t FEEL that big. When shopping for clothes I would hold up something that looked huge and be surprised when indeed it was too small.

Now, I’m in the high 150’s, wearing a size 10. I don’t feel any different. I can’t see the changes most of the time. Sure in pictures, comparing them I see it, but the day to day, it’s hard to see. I hold up clothes that look small and think they will never fit, yet they do.

Do you ever get to a point where you can see yourself for the size you really are? If so, how do you get there?

Tamishumate

yeah, i dont know, i am still where you are at, sometimes i even walk by a mirror and think the mirror is one of those "skinny ones" cause that s not me. Now by no means am I skinny, but i have lost alot of weight, and for the old me, well, i am skinny, lol. But I wonder that too...

staceyw37

if you were overwt for a long time, it will be a long time till your brain catches up to your new body. maybe hanging lots of new pictures of you will help the process? or maybe making lists of things you like about yourself (10 physical, 10 spiritual/personality) will also help you zero in on the new you.

i have the opposite problem. i see myself thinner than i am and then the reality is upsetting (tho of course i know how i got there). dave's tip of looking at yourself in the mirror naked is definitely a (horrible) reality check.
i know i have a long way to go...

congratulations on your achievements. eventually you will SEE the new you and KNOW it's 100% YOU.

omid990

i don't see myself any different as i was before. my friends, family, the scale, the measuring tape, and my clothes all tell my that i've lost weight, but when i look in the mirror, i don't see it.

i went shopping this weekend with a friend. while i was reaching for my usual large and size 10, she shoved a size 8 and a 6 in my hand. i kept telling her they won't fit and that i'm setting myself up for failure. when i tried them on, lo and behold the 8 fit easily. the 6 i could get on but it was snug. i couldn't believe it. if she had not shoved the two new sizes in my hand, i would have tried on and walked out of the store with another size 10 pants.

cheermom11

I hear you! I am exactly the same way: 33 pounds ago, "I didn’t perceive myself as obese, yet clearly I was. When I saw pictures I would get upset over my size, but I didn’t FEEL that big". Now, I don’t feel any different either.

I was just talking to a friend tonight and he wonders if I'm becoming too obsessive because he says EVERYONE has noticed how much different I look.

How DO we get to that point where we aren't hard on ourself anymore? If we can't affirm it on our own, you would think others' perceptions would. Hmmm...

angelinaz

I have the same self deception going on. I was "normal", 20 lbs thinner just four month ago. I ate up 20 lbs and keep thinking I look the same as I did at "normal" weight. Only thing is, I can't get into any of my December clothing. I can't wear a thing I wore all last year. I honestly don't think I see my face accurately, my body style, or even the clothes I wear. I am not sure what it has to do with yet I think the key is to really be present with me in the moment. I think that is the key to begin to see who I am in the physical and internal sense. Stop and pay attention.

sipefan

I lost 80 pound before and put most of it back! Funny thing is that people around me even though I was thin --when I look back, still treated me like I was fat. At least the one's that were close to me. Like I have a good friend who always would say isn't that right we fat girls got to stick together. I look back now and realize that I took that on. It not an excuse, I have control over me, but it did impact the view I took. I like what you are writing here as it is ispirational! For that I thank you all.

By the way, where did you get the fabulous ticker for lost weight? They are cool. I have only lost 7 lbs since I started about a week ago, and most of that is water I know... it will slow down. Sadly so! I have done this before...LOL.... and I would love to put something like that on myspace...etc.

Thanks again for sharing. :bigsmile: Happy losing everyone! We skinny people need to stick together. :happy:

12by311

Funny thing is that people around me even though I was thin --when I look back, still treated me like I was fat.

I can totally relate to this. When I lost 20+ pounds and was running no less than 5 miles a day....I was with about 4 of my friends and we were having to walk up a hill. I guess they were getting winded and one of them made the comment, "This is probably a great sight to see....the 5 most out of shape people here trying to walk up this hill...."

I will never forget that because in my mind I was thinkin "exxxxxxcuuuuuse me"....it wasn't bothersome to me AT ALL.

ladyofivy

I think about this topic very often.

When I measure myself and lose an inch somewhere, I'm just positive that it's operator problems... like, I'm just holding the tape measure too tightly, or at least more tightly than I did last time.

When I step on the scale, I think that it's probably not "fat" that I've lost it's probably just water weight. Yes, I've lost very close to 15 lbs of water weight. You'd think I'd dehydrate by now, wouldn't you? :laugh:

However, I'm starting to see some other changes in my thinking. Like when I'm huffing, puffing and sweating it out on the treadmill, and I put my hand on my stomach for a second, I'm surprised that there's still a lot of... belly there. LOL Like it's magically going to be gone because I'm on the 'mill.

I was so thin for such a long time that I'm always disgusted at pictures of myself, thinking, "That can NOT be me!" But it is. So I guess I imagine myself as skinnier, too. Hopefully my body will catch up with that portion of my brain quickly.

I guess I've had a "loser" mentality for such a long time, that I can't believe that I'm actually "good enough" to be working out and truly losing weight, so I chalk it up to not holding the tape measure right or only losing water weight.

When I do hit 15 lbs, I'll be taking some pictures of myself--I have some "befores" that I took; I'm interested to see if there will be any noticeable changes....

ladyofivy

By the way, where did you get the fabulous ticker for lost weight? They are cool. I have only lost 7 lbs since I started about a week ago, and most of that is water I know... it will slow down. Sadly so! I have done this before...LOL.... and I would love to put something like that on myspace...etc.

Click the TOOLS tab at the top. Then click Weight Loss Tickers. Select Change the Style of your Ticker, and follow the steps to customize your ticker how you want it--either with your own picture or a preset one. At the end, it will give you a few codes. If you want to put your ticker into your signature, highlight and copy the BBCode code that will be provided at the end. Then click the My Home tab, select Settings, then select Change Forum Signature, and paste your BBCode into the signature.

Good luck!

Edited to add: If you want it for myspace, you'll want the html code.

72lori

By the way, where did you get the fabulous ticker for lost weight? They are cool. I have only lost 7 lbs since I started about a week ago, and most of that is water I know... it will slow down. Sadly so! I have done this before...LOL.... and I would love to put something like that on myspace...etc.

I made my ticker using a picture I took of the flowers I just planted. It's easy to do.

arewethereyet

I hear ppl say each day " You look fabulous!"
I see the scale register 30 pounds lost.
I put on size 8s and a small shirt when I leave the house.
I look in the mirror to apply makeup and fix my hair.

Yet I cried when I saw the picture last week of me with a girlfriend of mine. We had both worn long sleeve hot pink sweaters and black pants and I thought it was funny.

I said to her "Am I that thin?" She said "NO, you are thinner!"

I am amazed that that is what ppl are seeing when they look at me. How could I not know??

Crazy, the mind, isnt it??

BTQ Leckel you look FANTASTIC! So fit and trim!

72lori

I hear ppl say each day " You look fabulous!"
I see the scale register 30 pounds lost.
I put on size 8s and a small shirt when I leave the house.
I look in the mirror to apply makeup and fix my hair.

Yet I cried when I saw the picture last week of me with a girlfriend of mine. We had both worn long sleeve hot pink sweaters and black pants and I thought it was funny.

I said to her "Am I that thin?" She said "NO, you are thinner!"

I am amazed that that is what ppl are seeing when they look at me. How could I not know??

Crazy, the mind, isnt it??

BTQ Leckel you look FANTASTIC! So fit and trim!

Thanks! I wish I saw it. All I see is a belly that needs toned, thighs that need to be smaller and toned, places that wiggle and jiggle..... wish I saw it the other way.

A neighbor just said to me that everytime she sees me I just get smaller and smaller. I need her eyes!

arewethereyet

I hear ppl say each day " You look fabulous!"
I see the scale register 30 pounds lost.
I put on size 8s and a small shirt when I leave the house.
I look in the mirror to apply makeup and fix my hair.

Yet I cried when I saw the picture last week of me with a girlfriend of mine. We had both worn long sleeve hot pink sweaters and black pants and I thought it was funny.

I said to her "Am I that thin?" She said "NO, you are thinner!"

I am amazed that that is what ppl are seeing when they look at me. How could I not know??

Crazy, the mind, isnt it??

BTQ Leckel you look FANTASTIC! So fit and trim!

Thanks! I wish I saw it. All I see is a belly that needs toned, thighs that need to be smaller and toned, places that wiggle and jiggle..... wish I saw it the other way.

A neighbor just said to me that everytime she sees me I just get smaller and smaller. I need her eyes!

are you reading my mind? Stop it!! :laugh: :laugh:

I hate the jiggle and the tummy when I lay on my side...........yuck!

But in clothes I look HOT! LOL

72lori

are you reading my mind? Stop it!! :laugh: :laugh:

I hate the jiggle and the tummy when I lay on my side...........yuck!

But in clothes I look HOT! LOL

Now you are reading my mind becasue I always say I look pretty good- in clothes!

Glad I'm not thinking of becoming a nudist. *shudder* at the thought.

sonjavon

This is something that I've struggled with my whole life. I was not a fat child - but I FELT like a fat kid. I was never built straight up and down either - I started wearing a bra (B cup) in 2nd grade... I had hips in 2nd grade too. But, I wasn't fat. My dad was very weight-conscious... and always policed what I was eating -which made me feel like I was fat. That's how I found myself signed up for Weight Watchers in 5th grade... I felt terrible - how much of a loser do you have to be to be at Weight Watchers meetings when your friends are taking ballet?
When I graduated high school I was wearing a size 9 that had to be taken in 3 inches in the waist. I was wearing large tops to accomodate shoulders and boobs - but my mom had to take in the bottoms of my shirts. I wore bandanas as belts tied around my waist.... that's ONE bandana. I still thought I was fat - of course I wasn't - but I thought I was.
In college I gained. By Thanksgiving of the first year, I was wearing a size 16, I thought I was fat then too, but looking at pictures I didn't look so bad. By the time I left college I was wearing a size 18. After I had my son I was in a size 20. 11 years later I was staring at my size 24 jeans thinking... aha - finally my body matches what my mind has been telling me all my life... I'm FAT.
Now... I've lost 17 pounds and I feel better than I can remember feeling in years. I mean - truly, I feel fabulous. And I too, feel the same way when I'm walking on the treadmill and reach down and feel my stomach.... wait, didn't I leave that behind at like, the end of the 2nd mile??? I don't know if I'll EVER know when I've become "thin". I know that I'll get there - but I just don't know if I'll realize it when I get there.

72lori

sonjavon- Maybe you are onto something. Maybe it goes back to how I saw myself as a kid. I matured fast and early. I was also wearing bras in 2nd grade. I was probably my height I am now by 5th grade. I was so big compared to other kids. Not fat, just big. Maybe it all goes back to how you perceived yourself as a child.

I don't know. Maybe I'll never see myself for how I look to others. Today at the gym I had on shorts, usually I wear capris. For the first 1/10 of a mile I noticed the muscle definition in my legs I never had before. EVER. After that, for the rest of the 2 miles, all I could see in the mirror were tree trunks.

Maybe it's not a quesiton of how you see yourself. Maybe it's a question of how to be happy with yourself no matter what. Hmmm, now I need to figure out how to convince my brain to work with me on this one.

sarabear

I have a hard time at this too. As a kid, I was like most of you, tall and bigger than most of the other kids, and they made fun of me, I think that that's why I'll never see myself as skinny, even when I do get to goal. My daughter, bless her heart, has my genes, and is taller and bigger, but kids today don't seem as cruel as they were when I was a kid, hopefully she doesn't develop this attitude about herself.

Then Thursday, my jeans are getting too big, so I went on the never ending hunt for the small waist big hips jean. I wear a 24, in maurices jeans, so I grabbed a 22, too snug, so I just had to suck it up and stick with the 24's until I loose some more, man that peeved me, I'm like I'm down 18 lbs! Why doesn't this fit?!?!?!:noway: :grumble:

72lori

I have a hard time at this too. As a kid, I was like most of you, tall and bigger than most of the other kids, and they made fun of me, I think that that's why I'll never see myself as skinny, even when I do get to goal. My daughter, bless her heart, has my genes, and is taller and bigger, but kids today don't seem as cruel as they were when I was a kid, hopefully she doesn't develop this attitude about herself.

Then Thursday, my jeans are getting too big, so I went on the never ending hunt for the small waist big hips jean. I wear a 24, in maurices jeans, so I grabbed a 22, too snug, so I just had to suck it up and stick with the 24's until I loose some more, man that peeved me, I'm like I'm down 18 lbs! Why doesn't this fit?!?!?!:noway: :grumble:

They need to make those small waist big hip jeans in all sizes! It was an issue for me at size 16 and is still and issue in a size 10. Same issues, different size.

By the way, you will get there. I have to lose a lot to change sizes. A few years ago I lost 25 pounds and never really went down a size. Depressing, yet true. It seems like once I started dropping sizes, it went faster. Hang in there and keep it up.

mfpme

hmmm interesting. :huh:

ladyofivy

hmmm interesting. :huh:

Is it?

sonjavon

Sarabear - I'm there too... actually in the same sizes. I'm right at the point where my clothes LOOK too loose and aren't flattering - but the next size down doesn't QUITE fit right either... grrrrrr

72lori

It's exciting to hit a size smaller, you'll be there soon. As exciting as it is, it also gets expensive. Don't buy alot, just enough to get you through til you change size again, you'll find yourself in need of clothes all the time it seems. I tended to wear stuff too big during the process. I had a rule, when I could pull down the pants without unbuttoning them, time to go bye bye! No belt can fix that.

psilva78227

I have the same problem...

I started in a size 22W, I now wear a 14. But I don't see the difference. I have others tell me they see it, but I don't. Is it just because we are use to seeing ourselves as being larger that we do not allow ourselves to see it as any different? I wish I could see the difference that others do, that is a good motivator.