Love at (sort of) First Sight?

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scapez
scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
in Chit-Chat
I've never really believed in it until some recent events really have me seriously considering otherwise.

I'm curious to hear of any of you that have either gotten together - moved in together - got married, whatever, after a time period that most would define as "too soon".

Has it worked for ya? Was it really love at first sight?
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Replies

  • Goldenwoof
    Goldenwoof Posts: 535 Member
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    This has really only happened to me once. I normally move VERY slowly with relationships, but this one time, I was absolutely blown away. The night we met, I could tell there was something different about her, and by the next day, I knew I wanted to spend forever with her. It wasn't a hunch or a "maybe" kinda thing...I KNEW.

    Unfortunately, it didn't end well. Long story short, she was in the midst of getting a divorce and ended up going back to her hubby. She just wasn't able to let go. But even so, yeah, I believe things can be very real very quickly.
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
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    Long story short, she was in the midst of getting a divorce and ended up going back to her hubby. She just wasn't able to let go.
    Wow...that sucks. Sorry you didn't get that happy ending. Prior to going back - did she seem as blown away and sure of forever that you were?
  • Goldenwoof
    Goldenwoof Posts: 535 Member
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    Wow...that sucks. Sorry you didn't get that happy ending. Prior to going back - did she seem as blown away and sure of forever that you were?

    I really can't be sure. Part of me wishes she did, but part of me also thinks that maybe I was just a way for her to spend her time while working things out with him. I honestly can't say what she was feeling. We spent a TON of time together, though, so putting aside her whole "I can't let go of this other relationship" thing, she seemed to be pretty into me. But that would always go away whenever she'd start trying to reconcile with him...something she did a few times over our two years together until I finally told her I'd had enough and she had to go.
  • hypotrochoid
    hypotrochoid Posts: 842 Member
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    I started dating my Manbeast, he moved in with me less than a month later, and then we married the next year. We've now been together 8 years.

    This is after the 3 months we spent as friends because I was completely convinced he was gay.
  • annalee_1
    annalee_1 Posts: 236 Member
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    I believe in it, I have not really experienced it I had a really hard time letting anyone get close to me after the divorce so it may have happened but life was just passing it by.
  • annalee_1
    annalee_1 Posts: 236 Member
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    Wow...that sucks. Sorry you didn't get that happy ending. Prior to going back - did she seem as blown away and sure of forever that you were?

    I really can't be sure. Part of me wishes she did, but part of me also thinks that maybe I was just a way for her to spend her time while working things out with him. I honestly can't say what she was feeling. We spent a TON of time together, though, so putting aside her whole "I can't let go of this other relationship" thing, she seemed to be pretty into me. But that would always go away whenever she'd start trying to reconcile with him...something she did a few times over our two years together until I finally told her I'd had enough and she had to go.

    I totally 100% have been thru that exact same thing, I'm sorry you had to go thru that I thought I would die from a broken heart, he went back and forth for 5 years- I know I let him but god it hurt!
  • mama1229
    mama1229 Posts: 57
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    Started "talking" to my husband in July, 2 months later we moved in together. July 2012, will be 17 yrs together.:smile:
  • Josie_lifting_cats
    Josie_lifting_cats Posts: 949 Member
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    My (now) husband and I met on the internet 10 years ago.

    He came out to Minnesota to visit after chatting online for 6 months or so, and we moved in together about 3 months later approximately. He proposed about 4 months after that. We didn't get married for quite a while after that (YEARS), but I never regretted saying yes.
  • mmstgr
    mmstgr Posts: 578 Member
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    Okay, this sounds lame, but my bf and I met over ICQ. You all remember icq right?
    Hahaha. Well I was 19 and he randomly messaged me one day. We chatted for a few weeks, then finally met up.
    I knew right away we would be together.
    We were seeing each other for probably 9 months when we got an apartment together. (I had already been staying at his apartment)
    Then about 3 months after that we bought our first house.
    About 2 months later we decided to have our first child.
    We've been together nearly 10 years now and have 2 little boys.
    I wouldn't change it for the world. We both knew what we wanted and when we wanted it.
    I've always been an impulsive person.
    I love him :)
  • Sarahmeridith
    Sarahmeridith Posts: 298 Member
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    My husband and I were love at first sight, but we were young and Im sure that made us a lot less careful, but even though we have loved each other for a long time we were both so nervous about getting married it took us about 8 years and me being 7 months pregnant to finally tie the knot!
  • DBiddle69
    DBiddle69 Posts: 682 Member
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    Interesting time to post this one...

    ?? Apr 83 - My wife and I were not together as a couple however, we were working in the same restaurant.

    31 Dec 83 - We went out, as a group of friends, for New Years eve.....mind you we never even talked about dating!

    1 Jan 84 - I asked her if she would marry me.

    15 Jan 84 - Her ex-boyfriend moved out....I moved in.

    25 Feb 84 - Married

    25 Feb 12 - Celebrating our 28th wedding anniversary tomorrow!!
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    LOL the woman I fell in love with actually (back when I was 19), the first time I saw her I thought she was just meh, But her personality and everything, she was just so damn nice. She's one of those girls that you talk to her for 5 minutes you think "how could anyone not fall in love with a girl like this" and the next thing you're thinking is "I love this girl!". I never went out with her, she didnt wanted to date anyone not sharing the same religion (She was Jewish). Almost 10 years later, she was, and is, my only love.
  • pa_jorg
    pa_jorg Posts: 4,404 Member
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    Mine was more my intuition than a mutual thing... we were neighbors and I saw him outside through the window for the first time when he was moving in. A little voice or something told me he would be an important part of my life. It's been 15 years now and even though we aren't together anymore, we do still have a great connection.
  • jenaissance
    jenaissance Posts: 302 Member
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    my husband is the only guy I dated that I was instantly drawn to. We discussed moving in together after only 2 months, actually did it at 6 months, got married after 3 years of living together, and just celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary (and 11th "together" anniversary). I knew after our 1st date (a blind date too!) that he was the man for me :)
  • Miss♥Ivi
    Miss♥Ivi Posts: 461
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    This topic depends on too many factors. A part of me says no because once the fairy dust settles, the twinkle in their eyes disappears and the pretty light above their heads fade, so do the feelings. It's like weight loss. Slow and steady is much better than quick and easy. Another part of me says yes because something had to absolutely attract you to the person. And another part of me suggests what you feel isn't really love at all. It's more of an infatuation with a person. Kind of like the honeymoon stage in a relationship. Some last 3 months, others last 3 years, others never leave it.

    That's my pointless addition to this thread :tongue: Sorry if it didn't make sense :laugh:
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    I don't know if I believe in love at first sight.. I think it's lust. Now, if I spent time talking to that person (online or phone) and THEN met, yes, I would think it's possibly love... but a random stranger- no.
  • Cberg9
    Cberg9 Posts: 123
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    I hated my husband when we first met, I worked at a kiosk in the mall and he had just joined the AF. Him and his cocky friends would walk around and take pics of girls they thought were hot. Well I had a boyfriend so I shot him down, and they snapped a pic and put it up on their stupid website and underneath my pic was the caption "um...B****" I hated him after that

    Flash forward a few years later, going out with a mutual friend she told me he would be coming because he just got out of a really bad relationship. Sucks to be him I thought. He spent the whole night asking me to make out with him. I finally got in his face and said get the F away from me. He plopped down on a barstool next to me and told me how he just wanted to go to baseball practice. Find the woman of his dreams and have a son.

    We were married 4 months later, we now have a son and it's been 6 years for us!
  • KimmieBrie
    KimmieBrie Posts: 825 Member
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    Husband and I met.... 3 mos later he said we should live together which sort of scared the crap out of me... 2 mos later we kind of did live together but more back and forth as I wasn't able to fully let go of my own place... 6 mos later he proposed... 3 mos after that we got married and both moved out of our respective places into the home we now share.

    Was it love at first sight? I'd say for me no... At 1st I was like eh... but he grew on me fast and I can't imagine life without him now!
  • AuntieMC
    AuntieMC Posts: 346 Member
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    Yes, I absolutely believe in love at first sight, because it happened to me. However, you need to use your BRAIN, too (which I did not!). I was 22, and he was 19. We met at college, went out a few days later, moved in together very quickly, and were married before the year was out (less than ten months later!). I was madly, deleriously in love! Sadly, after about four years, we started having problems. Things deterioarated year by year, he became abusive, and neither one of us was happy with the marriage. But I stayed because I had a child to raise (in those days, SOME of us were still at-home moms!), and he stayed because his religion forbade divorce. We were married for 28 years. For many of those years, he was quite verbally and emotionally abusive. We finally got divorced about 4 years ago.

    The fact that the marriage ultimately became unhappy, and eventually ended in divorce doesn't negate the fact that I truly experienced love at first sight. It is a happy memory to this day, in spite of everything, and even though I no longer have any communication with him. It was hard to disentangle myself emtionally, but I am glad I did!

    I can't regret the marriage because we did get a wonderful daughter, and I got to stay home and raise her. But if I had used any brain at all, I could have forseen trouble ahead. So don't just listen to your heart. Just because you are crazy in love with someone, it doesn't mean it would be a wise marraige choice! THINK. How much do you REALLY have in common? What is his relationship history like? What is his relationship with his family like? And here's a real important one -- how does his FATHER treat his mother?? There are other things to think about too! A pastor, minister or priest might be able to help you find other things to consider.

    Good luck to you!
  • Josie_lifting_cats
    Josie_lifting_cats Posts: 949 Member
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    This topic depends on too many factors. A part of me says no because once the fairy dust settles, the twinkle in their eyes disappears and the pretty light above their heads fade, so do the feelings. It's like weight loss. Slow and steady is much better than quick and easy. Another part of me says yes because something had to absolutely attract you to the person. And another part of me suggests what you feel isn't really love at all. It's more of an infatuation with a person. Kind of like the honeymoon stage in a relationship. Some last 3 months, others last 3 years, others never leave it.

    That's my pointless addition to this thread :tongue: Sorry if it didn't make sense :laugh:

    I am totally not in the honeymoon phase anymore. His farting is not ignored, I know all his faults and he knows mine, and we've been through some tough stuff. It's different than it was at first, sure.... because now I love him for different reasons. But that's love - it evolves.

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