Stupid, annoying depression

Oo_BrookeNicole_oO

I feel the same way almost every night. It gets so bad that I physically feel sick. I've noticed that little things trigger it. Ex. facebook, my bf leaving, being alone in my room. You are so not alone. I think this happens to so many women. I blame our crazy hormones. I hope that this can help you: when I start feeling sad I do anything and everything that will distract my mind. Usually I turn to reading or playing games on my phone. Sometimes it will work and sometimes it won't. Sometimes I wish that there was some fool proof pill that can you can pop and make all the worries go away! Just know that there are many supportive people on this site that you can turn to at any time of the day to help make you feel better. You're doing wonderful already by not eating those ever so tempting cookies! (wish I had that kind of willpower :P)

RockKelly

It must be one of those days...I just posted that I could feel my anxiety coming on pretty strong tonight.

unicornassassin

Ugh, yeah, depression...

My friend and I were having a conversation about that Catch-22. You know you should get out and do something, go work out, call a friend, whatever it is that makes you feel better, but you CAN'T because you're depressed and have no motivation. She said that's what she's going to write her thesis about, and try to find an answer to how to get motivated when you're depressed. I said if she could people would shower her feet with gold, and she would be canonized.

So good job for you, reaching for the keyboard instead of the cookies!

heyghoge

just reading the posts here makes me feel less alone. i agree with that catch-22... if you could find it in yourself to love yourself enough to take care and get moving... you wouldn't have fallen into the pit of depression in the first place! so frustrating. one day at a time.

DianaJaneD

Shannon, I think it will be so helpful that you posted this. Good for you! I've dealt with depression, too and a few years ago when I started exercising, I was able to go off meds and haven't needed them since! It truly was the key for me! You are right to be open and get lots of support on MFP. You are truly the exercise queen and now I know why! Take care

kerrymh

Great post. My father recently outed himself on fb, he was ashamed and I am proud because there is nothing to be ashamed about...its a chemical imbalance in our brain...there is no fault, or doesn't have to be a reason, depression is just malfunctioning of a body part just like any other disease. My mothers a mental health nurse and she encouraged him to talk openly about this and educate people.
Being open won't make it go away but hopefully you'll take away the shame and guilt that you might have felt along with it in the past. good luck!

newmein2013

Excellent post! Each time you replace a destructive behavior with a constructive behavior, you become stronger. Keep up the good work and don't beat yourself up when you're not having a strong moment. Just don't allow it to spiral. You can check with your doc and see if it's ok to take ginko biloba if that's something you'd be interested in. I started taking it a week ago and it really clears my head and gives me energy. I take 120 mg daily, sold over the counter. This is not medical advise, just sharing what works for me.

2hobbit1

Having lived it with both myself and several family members I know your pain and struggle to keep on going and get anything done.
Even a 10 to 15 minute walk can make a huge difference in mood and energy levels. So if you can do anything make sure you get your walk in. It can be in short intervals at first but as you energy increases you will find that the longer walks are a great way to let go of some of your stress and anxiety. They become you meditation space.

With the weather improving and spring approaching sometimes just sitting outside in the sun and listening to the birds helps to lift the mood.

I find in the winter I need to be diligent with using a dawn simulator and a light box. Most people have heard of using these for SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) what most people call the winter blues but the literature indicated that it helps with depression as well. I know it works for me!

dennydifferent

Having been unhappy most of my life, about 2 years ago I really fell into a pit. I went from non-smoker to 20 a day, had weeks at a time off work unable to do anything, self-harmed and started having anxiety attacks. All during this, and after, I binged and binged, until I finally decided to cut down and get healthy.

Even watching my calories and losing 30lbs didn't make me feel that much better. Jogging 5k three times a week didn't either. It wasn't until I went cold turkey on the refined, processed junk food (anything with an ingredients list) that I really started to feel better. The background sadness that I'd carried with me for so long lifted, and I spent entire days, then weeks, then months, feeling OK. Balanced, stable, normal. It was a complete revelation. I don't manage my depression anymore, I just don't have it.

When I work out my body feels good, but my emotions are ruled by my diet. Garbage in, garbage out. My 2 cents.

annabellj

http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=sad+light&tag=googhydr-20&index=hpc&hvadid=2879956351&ref=pd_sl_37rx1w4ygv_b
light box might help some of you. luckily i live in az so i dont need one but when it rains for a few days i can def tell a difference. i love what you said about diabetes.

firemaiden

well done. such a secret society issue, yet a lot of people feel it on a regular basis. yet we feel ashamed or embarrassed to admit it. i have found in the two weeks that i have been doin this i have felt heaps better. important things for me are water, flush those blues away. exercise, im getting more motivated now after doing an hour most days. half on days when i work. ive given up smokes (both types) in the past few months. this has made a HUGE difference to my moods. plus ive bein using st johns wort everyday. you really have to know your body, is something sparkin this feeling etc and dont beat yourself up when u have a crap day, **** happens

cessnaholly

Do we ask someone with diabetes "what do you have to be DIABETIC about?"

Love it. You are not alone. Been there. Still there. MFP friends help. My husband got a sunlight light bulb for me for our livingroom. That might help someone else with SAD. Doesn't help me a ton but every little bit helps. Vitamin D helps me a little bit too.

Of course, there are days where if I didn't have persistant children and husband I'd never eat or get out of bed either. I don't overeat. I undereat. Just as bad I know.

Good luck.

laurastrait21

I love this topic, and I LOVE the comment about diabetes! I never thought of explaining it that way and it is so powerful. I have struggled off and on with depression and popped around medications since age 14 or so and my weight has fluctuated along with that. I have an opposite problem - when I am depressed, I don't eat. But I am so amazed at the power of exercise to affect my mood that I know I have to get out there and do it. The most difficult thing is getting there but I am echoing what you all say .. just start. No one can say you didn't try!

I have added a number of you and would love your support on MFP as well! Add me, I'm Laura!

scrappinsam

depression sucks. have had bouts since 1990 but this year is really bad-have started to come out of it though and just have to keep pushing myself to keep going
the sunlight helps lift my spirits and helps me force myself out of bed-exercise helps a lot so I have to keep walking and training

nomena

I've been hospitalized twice for severe depression and know what a terrible burden it is. Some days even getting out of bed seems like an impossible task. But if you got out of bed today, ate healthy and exercised, you can do it again tomorrow. That's my motto.

jakefkelley

I have cut and pasted your posting and I sent it to my duaghter who has depression and weight issues. I think this will help her. Thanks for your help. Hang in there.

HealthyAlison

Hi ShanRaeC,

Thanks for having the courage to post this! There have really been a lot of good responses. Hopefully they provide some help to you (and each other) in your struggle with depression.

I don't have depression necessarily, but I am transgender, not yet transitioned full-time. I experience depressive symptoms fairly often, but with a definite cause. I'm married with kids, so I'm holding off transition a while while we sort out some family stuff. The 'cure' is sitting right in front of me, but I only get a little taste of it every now and then. Like you, when I feel the most down it is a real challenge to eat right and exercise. I think the majority of my weight problems have been related to the emotional trauma of living in the wrong gender. But like you, I am able to name what my problem and talk about it. Having good friends really helps, as does a good workout.

Hopefully you have some good friends, on and off MFP, who you can talk with when you are feeling down. Congratulations on turning down those GS cookies! (I won't even ask if you want to buy any. We have less than a case to go and we're done for the year!)

Thanks again for sharing your story!
Alison

Bentley2718

I feel the same way almost every night. It gets so bad that I physically feel sick. I've noticed that little things trigger it. Ex. facebook, my bf leaving, being alone in my room. You are so not alone. I think this happens to so many women. I blame our crazy hormones. I hope that this can help you: when I start feeling sad I do anything and everything that will distract my mind. Usually I turn to reading or playing games on my phone. Sometimes it will work and sometimes it won't. Sometimes I wish that there was some fool proof pill that can you can pop and make all the worries go away! Just know that there are many supportive people on this site that you can turn to at any time of the day to help make you feel better. You're doing wonderful already by not eating those ever so tempting cookies! (wish I had that kind of willpower :P)

1) Depression is more commonly diagnosed in women, but it happens to many men as well. We don't fully understand the reason for sex disparities in depression, but a lot of current theories involve things other than depression. And we don't even have very good answers about why people get depressed. Personally, I HATE the "crazy hormones" response. Men have hormones and hormonal cycles too.

2) While distracting yourself with trivial things (games, books, etc.) works for some people, it can also be very detrimental long-term. I used to do this, the result, I didn't get much else done. For someone who suffers from depression long-term, this type of avoidance can be as debilitating as the depression itself.

Bentley2718

For the OP, you are definitely not alone, as you can see! I've struggled with depression and anxiety since childhood. I still take medication, and I still struggle. But what I can say is that like you, exercise is my savior. So too, are better eating habits. I'm not one of those people who think refined sugar is a demon sent to destroy all humans, but I do know that eating too much of it, along with not having a generally balanced diet makes my depression much worse. The problem for me is that once I start eating a lot of sugar, I don't want to stop, so I just get worse until I put my foot down with myself. So congratulations on turning down the girl scout cookies! And for opening up about your problems, I know how hard that can be.

beccasalo

WOW. Maybe we should start a depression group on here. I had no idea so many people would be having the same problem I am having. This is the first time in a long time I don't feel so alone. Feel free to "friend" me. I need more people in my life who understand what depression really is.

That said, something that has REALLY helped me is an amino acid called GABA. You can get it at the health food stores. It is a natural amino acid found in meat, and it comes in chewable tablets. I combine it with flax-seed oil pills and a B-complex pill. A therapist recommended this combo to me and it has changed my life.

HeidiLynnM

I also have severe depression, and I feel like eating is so much easier. I also have fibromyalgia. It kicks my butt. It is so sad that I have everything I need in this house to get off my butt, and excercise. I am right there with you!!! My goal is to lose 30 pounds, and to me it seems like it will take forever to get it off, but my mind is stubborn. You can add me also

HeidiLynnM

I've been hospitalized twice for severe depression and know what a terrible burden it is. Some days even getting out of bed seems like an impossible task. But if you got out of bed today, ate healthy and exercised, you can do it again tomorrow. That's my motto.

I know this feeling all too well! There are days that I could sleep my life away. The sad thing is that I know that I can do things to change this awful disorder(bipolar, depression, panic attacks), but I have the motivation of a snail sometimes. I put on weight due to my meds 2 years ago. I now look at myself, and want to scream. I will not buy bigger jeans. I would rather wear my comfy pants that I get from areo or american eagle. I dont notice how big I have gotten. I used to be a slim girl, I have never had a weight problem. It just makes me worst sometimes!!! I know I am crying the blues, but I have to say that I really do understand. I often wonder what it is like to not feel this way!!!

Dumbell_Diva

Same here I have had 5 days in a row where everything is black and dark like I am in a tunnel. Wherever I go there are smiling happy faces but I cant see what they are smiling about, its like theyre sharing some great funny joke and I just dont get the punchline. So I withdraw into myself, I open the cookies or sweets, or I have a spoonful of peanut butter, some comfort food...but at the back of my mind, its still there, this black tunnel and there is no way out. I cry at night, well I cant sleep so nothing else to do!!! Then I sleep and wake continously over and over, 2 hours sleep at any one time is good going. Every other woman looks better than me, more attractive, slimmer, just happier. Im the person nobody wants to chat to at the school gates, well, I have nothing to say for myself really, stuck in day after day with 3 arguing children. And on it goes....I then have 3 days of being normal or happy and then back to a few days of depression again!

But it wasnt always like this...only for the past 6 months since Ive had this premature menopause. Prior to that I only had a few down days with PMS (and suffered post natal depression after having the children, but thats over 7 years ago now).

If anybody wants to add me as a friend, or feels they could help, message me

Dumbell_Diva

Im not sure if I can post a link on here or not...but I found this site and the tips are really useful

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/stop-feeling-depressed/

Basically it advises a change of scenery, such as getting out the house, going for a walk etc , as routine contributes to depression, it also advises to break your routine, interacting with animals and nature, which is very true as I find my emotions change when I am for example near a babbling brook or the sea, just the sounds of the ocean picks me up, getting moving, ie: exercise which triggers off the feel good section of your brain, something to do with endomorphins and seretonin I think, and also encourages to be around positive people. Hope this helps. I almost feel happier just reading the article and I apologise if my previous post was a bit negative, thats the nature of the beast Im afraid...up and down, up and down! Have a great evening everybody!

WhitneyAnnabelle

I was diagnosed with Bipolar I seven years ago (and have had anxiety and panic disorders since I was a very young child), and I have to agree that exercise absolutely helps. I gained over 60 pounds from lithium and other drugs and took it off almost primarily through exercise. This past summer, right before I was to be married, I got so depressed that I couldn't eat OR exercise...so I guess it goes both ways (some people eat, some people don't). I lost five pounds right before the wedding, my dress was too big, and I was just miserable. I'm starting to exercise more and more (though I have been in a slump as of late), and I'm hoping that my diet and exercise will help maintain my mood so I can eventually have a child, med-free. All you can do is try to adopt the most healthy habits possible and do what you need to do for YOU. A lot of people think I'm crazy (haha) for being a raw vegan, but it helps my mood, so I'm sticking with it. You are definitely in good company. Mental illness is definitely something of which no one should be ashamed. Like you said, no one rails on people with diabetes or other 'real' illnesses. Depression (and mental illness in general) is the epitome of 'real' illness.

unsweets

I also have dealt with depression even when life was going great. Here is a link to something that helped me alot. It is titled seasonal defective disorder, but really it applies to depression anytime. http://www.karenhurd.com/pages/healthtopics/specifichealthconcerns/ht-shc-doldrums.html
It is written by a nutritionist who has had success helping people heal from all kinds of ailments useing nutrition.
It is amazing how the specific foods that you eat can affect your mood in an endless cycle of craving foods that cause depression that leads to more cravings.

joyzoso

I read this thread a few hours ago and it helped peel me off the couch and into the gym and onto the treadmill to run 5.10 miles, so thank you. The past couple of weeks have been tough.

Have battled depression for a long time now, don't want anti-depressants, or birth control to help. I am a graduate student, 35 and single and going through a bit of a transition (with school). Exercise is a huge help and a big believer in diet, but I know how easily one can be knocked down and isolate themselves. Last weekend completely social, this weekend... did not want to be.

Just wanted to say thanks for the post and to hang in there. It is incredibly nice to see that we are not alone!

Dumbell_Diva

Good link, just had a good look, hadnt realised about the usefullness of the B complex vitamin, which I have in my cupboard so I shall be using it, also the protein every 3 hours...lots of useful tips,. thanks for posting

I. http://www.karenhurd.com/pages/healthtopics/specifichealthconcerns/ht-shc-doldrums.html
It is written by a nutritionist who has had success helping people heal from all kinds of ailments useing nutrition.
It is amazing how the specific foods that you eat can affect your mood in an endless cycle of craving foods that cause depression that leads to more cravings.

Dumbell_Diva

I was diagnosed with Bipolar I seven years ago (and have had anxiety and panic disorders since I was a very young child), and I have to agree that exercise absolutely helps. I gained over 60 pounds from lithium and other drugs and took it off almost primarily through exercise. This past summer, right before I was to be married, I got so depressed that I couldn't eat OR exercise...so I guess it goes both ways (some people eat, some people don't). I lost five pounds right before the wedding, my dress was too big, and I was just miserable. I'm starting to exercise more and more (though I have been in a slump as of late), and I'm hoping that my diet and exercise will help maintain my mood so I can eventually have a child, med-free. All you can do is try to adopt the most healthy habits possible and do what you need to do for YOU. A lot of people think I'm crazy (haha) for being a raw vegan, but it helps my mood, so I'm sticking with it. You are definitely in good company. Mental illness is definitely something of which no one should be ashamed. Like you said, no one rails on people with diabetes or other 'real' illnesses. Depression (and mental illness in general) is the epitome of 'real' illness.

Thanks for posting, my best friend is bipolar and it has helped me realise what she goes through. She had gained loads of weight on her meds, she came off her meds, went off the rails and had a huge struggle, I wont go into the details on here but it opened my eyes to peoples prejudice and what this poor lass went through as a result of it all was pretty bad. Thanks again and hope things are better for you now

kissedbytheocean

I love this thread. I've had clinical depression since I was a child (I'm 22 now), and have been on almost every anti-depressant out there. Nothing seems to help long term. I know exercise is supposed to help, but like another poster said, it's really a catch-22 sometimes. I took today off just because I couldn't manage to pull myself out of bed for 30 minutes.

Feel free to add me as a friend. It'd be nice to be around like-minded people who share this terrible struggle.