I cheated....and now I feel bad about myself.

RileeMarie

So my B/F was out of town all week, he got home last night and we went out to dinner. I have been diligent on eating non-fatty foods (especially fried) and sticking to my diet. Well last he ordered a HUGE plate of fries. And of course the waitress stuck them right under my face. And of course the temptation got the best of me. So I had not just one but a "few." Other than that I had catfish and a small salad. But eating those fries just killed all the hard work I had done this last week. He is supportive of me in loosing weight and getting in shape. But is it fair of me to ask him while I am on this journey to not order such food? Ultimately I know it's up to me to say "no" to the temptation. So this morning I have decided to work off those fries by adding an extra 20 minute cardio to my normal 40. I just feel like I let myself down.. :sad:

npeters519

No, it's not fair to ask him to change his diet to accommodate you all the time. For me and my DH eating out is a treat so when we go we order what we want. Mine stays within my calorie allowances but I do not ask him not to order what he wants so I'm not tempted. Willpower, for me, is the hardest part of this journey. But it's so good to build it up. Your boyfriend isn't the only person in your life that will eat bad things around you. It's best to learn how to manage yourself and let others make their own choices.

Don't get down on yourself for one mistake. We all slip up here and there. Log it, remember how you felt about it so when you're tempted next time you have more resistance!

Good luck!!!

michael300891

Thought this was going to be a thread about cheating with people not with food haha =D

fibrogirl

Don´t be too hard on yourself, this is a lifestyle change and remember life is to be lived and enjoyed! It´s not as if you go out every night and cheat on fries etc so give yourself a break! You´ve done really well so far, just draw a line under and get back on track afterall you´ve compensated with extra exercise so that´s a positive move and there´ll be no damage done I´m sure.

Good luck with the rest of your journey :flowerforyou:

xgg2rs

Allow yourself to not be perfect. The trick is not letting that bad meal become a bad day and that bad day become a bad week. I have even read in a few books that a cheat meal every once in a while is good to trick your body into losing again.

michael300891

Allow yourself to not be perfect. The trick is not letting that bad meal become a bad day and that bad day become a bad week. I have even read in a few books that a cheat meal every once in a while is good to trick your body into losing again.

I believe that this may actually be true, but I dont know whether its metabolic or psychological. If I feel "guilty" about having a cheat meal, ill be harsher on myself during the week - not sure if other people feel the same but I think a cheat meal really helps my overall progress.

kbmnurse

Get OVER it.

RileeMarie

thanks for the insight, ultimately it's up to me to say no and you are right i cant ask him to not order things he likes. and haha on the post of cheating with others not food..i think that is another forum page.. lol.. ok time to get my workout in.. thanks again for the support.

liog

Don't beat yourself up. Yesterday I had two servings of chocolate covered pretzels. For no other reason than my kids were driving me crazy and I had the munchies. But, the pretzels were yummy and I enjoyed them and today is another day.

lind3400

You're gunna have to learn willpower, you wouldn't ask your non-dieting friends to order something healthy would you???
Just distract yourself with your water glass or something or make him slap ur hand away every time you reach for one

Becky_Boodle

I wouldn't feel bad if I were you...you're entitled to have days when you don't eat as good as you usually do...I really don't think you did any harm to your progress...plus you worked them off the next day...

HeidiRene

I think you can ask if he minds not ordering such food; however, I don't think you can expect him not to. eating is a personal choice. However; most importantly, eating fries does not ruin your diet!! Think of it this way...before you probably ate fries (or equivalent) every day if not every meal...this week it was only one meal....so that is a victory! I have totally felt bad after "cheating" too, that's very normal, but I hope this adds some perspective. Don't beat yourself up!! Just get back to it. If you only ate a few fries for one meal every week and otherwise stuck to a good eating/exercise plan you would still lose.

Dan112358

I knocked back a bunch of wings, a platter called "bacon cheeseburger nachos" (which were super awesome btw), some fried cheese things & washed them all down with a few beers! You can't get upset over a few fries. As long as these types of meals are the exception & not the regular occurrence, don't worry about it. Hit the cardio, drink lots of water & treat today like what it is: a new day!

Victoria2448

So my B/F was out of town all week, he got home last night and we went out to dinner. I have been diligent on eating non-fatty foods (especially fried) and sticking to my diet. Well last he ordered a HUGE plate of fries. And of course the waitress stuck them right under my face. And of course the temptation got the best of me. So I had not just one but a "few." Other than that I had catfish and a small salad. But eating those fries just killed all the hard work I had done this last week. He is supportive of me in loosing weight and getting in shape. But is it fair of me to ask him while I am on this journey to not order such food? Ultimately I know it's up to me to say "no" to the temptation. So this morning I have decided to work off those fries by adding an extra 20 minute cardio to my normal 40. I just feel like I let myself down.. :sad:

Give yourself a break! A few fries DID NOT undo all your hard work. Our choices are cumualtive, good or bad. If you eat healthy most of the time you will reach your goals! I usually always steal a couple of fries from my husband's plate (when we go to this place that has hand cut fries) It hasn't hurt me a bit.

Count this as a WIN..because you didn't eat a whole order!

hkulbacki

So my B/F was out of town all week, he got home last night and we went out to dinner. I have been diligent on eating non-fatty foods (especially fried) and sticking to my diet. Well last he ordered a HUGE plate of fries. And of course the waitress stuck them right under my face. And of course the temptation got the best of me. So I had not just one but a "few." Other than that I had catfish and a small salad. But eating those fries just killed all the hard work I had done this last week. He is supportive of me in loosing weight and getting in shape. But is it fair of me to ask him while I am on this journey to not order such food? Ultimately I know it's up to me to say "no" to the temptation. So this morning I have decided to work off those fries by adding an extra 20 minute cardio to my normal 40. I just feel like I let myself down.. :sad:

I don't really consider it a 'cheat' if you're willing to put in the extra work to burn it off. And it sounds like that's exactly what you're doing! So great job!

kaned_ferret

My OH has been pretty sweet since I decided to make it all a bit healthier, he's bought semi skimmed milk instead of full-fat, even though I didn't ask him to (thought never crossed my mind to be honest!) and that means a lot to me. But he also has crisps and all other sorts of sweet things, which I just have to have the willpower to leave well alone. Last night however, he brought home a packet of fox's crunch cream biscuits. I ate 2/3 of the pack, and hell no, I don't feel sorry for a second, there was no way I was going to fight it, or feel bad after! I enjoyed them, and why would I want to detract from that?

As someone else said, as long as it isn't the start of a slippery slope, there's nothing wrong with it. Today I was snacking back on nuts and seeds, happy as ever. I still feel good because I know that previously, that pack of biscuits could have been a daily habit. Previously, I would eat junk food along with my regular healthy food on a daily basis. So now, with exercising and overall better food choices/portions, I'm still better off, even with the biscuit binge!

wickedcricket

A few french fries once in a while is not going to derail you- esp if you work them off. IMO if you work it off, it's not technically cheating. But also, I don't use that term - I just call it 'splurge' or whatever. who are you cheating?

The thing is YOU ARE AWARE. You're logging & counting calories- working off those extra cals. You did nothing wrong- NOBODY eats perfectly all the time. The effort is the thing and just keeping with it.

Forgive yourself. Take a hot bubble bath. Tomorrow's another day

triplejay1

I have something bad once a week.

JacksMom12

A few fries definitely won't derail your whole week. Being that strict will possibly lead to burning out and feeling too deprived. I eat "bad" stuff all the time, I log it, keep it within my calories, and repeat. I am 3 lbs from goal, so it's working for me!

MrsKosal

I thought this another kind of cheating post too!

I had a terrible week, but today is a new day, and tomorrow is gone. Just start fresh today.

lindawayne11

don't feel bad. I had an 'off' day last Tuesday. Ate a ton of junk, didn't excercize, and the next morning I declared it a new day and wiped it from my mind. Then weighed myself on Friday- my weigh in day- and lost 1.5 lbs. So, don't let it get to you. It can be fixed!

RileeMarie

you guys are awesome with exception of one post.. trust me I GOT over it.. and i feel better. yesterday is gone, i cant change it, just learn by it.. and i feel much better... thanks everyone for the support.. hope all a great workout and day..

ilikejam33

I actually love it when my bf orders crap, it means i dont have to and he always lets me have a bite, or a few fries, the best part is i can enjoy that and dont have to order it myself.

Moderation...everything...always

Jesea

Do-over! Just like when we were kids....no guilt, no remorse...just move on.

kmbrleykay

If you stayed within your calorie goal and you exercised it off if is not cheating to me. I allow myself treats all the time so long as they are within my calorie goal. & I never order fries or something like that for myself, but I do indulge myself by having a couple of me nieces if they are with me. that way I get the pleasure of a few and am not eating a whole order. Depriving yourself of all treats is only going to force you into burn out. This is life, I am not going to give up everything I like for the rest of my life, so I must work it into my plan.

To me cheating is eating something, not logging it, hiding it, or denying it. If you are honest & open, you did not cheat. You allowed yourself to enjoy your time out.

starfishsaving

I give myself weekly days "off." Those days, usually days when I know I'm going to be eating out, I'm not going out with the PLAN to gorge myself and eat like a pig, but I am giving myself permission in advance to make choices that I wouldn't allow myself to make most days. If I work it off later, great, if I don't, then I have NOT undone my hard work- I think back ot the days not long ago when I would have eaten all that and THEN some, and not thought twice about it. So what if I gained a pound or two back. It serves as a reminder why I should make better choices every day (even on days "off," I usually meet my calorie goals) but I'm still healthier already and I'm 15 lbs lighter than I was when I started and I expect that number is going to keep changing for the better, "cheat" days or not. Whatever you do, don't ever "feel bad about yourself." That kind of thinking makes us give up on ourselves and feel like we're just not able to keep going.

BIGJIMMYU

There isn't one of us on here that hasn't stumbled like this.(or very few). Pick yourself up, dust off and get going! You will get there!

funkycamper

A few french fries once in a while is not going to derail you- esp if you work them off. IMO if you work it off, it's not technically cheating. But also, I don't use that term - I just call it 'splurge' or whatever. who are you cheating?

The thing is YOU ARE AWARE. You're logging & counting calories- working off those extra cals. You did nothing wrong- NOBODY eats perfectly all the time. The effort is the thing and just keeping with it.

Forgive yourself. Take a hot bubble bath. Tomorrow's another day

Ditto! I actually plan splurges where I eat what I want without any guilt and often find that it helps me break through to a new low on the scale. There fun and I never feel guilty. Hasn't hurt my weight loss yet.

There are diets strategies that help you plan these guilt-free splurges like zig-zagging, the Spike Diet and such. There's a lot of research to show that flexible dieters are more successful in both achieving their goal and maintaining it.

I think it would be a sad world if I had to give up ever eating french fries, pizza, ice cream, cookies, cake, chocolate, yada yada. I usually have some of something yummy like this a couple times a week. Enjoy!

RileeMarie

thanks for all the comments, my problem i guess is i dont want to go back down that road of bad or should i say non-eating habits. long history of an eating disorder. i felt guilty last night because i have worked so hard on eating right and exercising and was more scared because i let an "oops" happen, i would do something that i dont want to start doing again. and i am going to allow myself to have a "splurge" (i like that as someone else posted) and not feel guilty. i know i will just work it off the next day and i am ok with that. thanks for the encouraging words.. :happy:

gregavila

Seriously, did it really cause you to ruin everything you've accomplished this week. Assuming that you are eating to lose a pound a week that would mean you ate at least 3,500 calories of fries to undo everything you've been working for.

There is nothing wrong with having an occasion al bad night or bad meal. Just don't make it a habit.

webdiva1

yeah, i hear ya. guilt can be powerful. a couple of things to consider.

maybe you can turn the guilt around, and use it to motivate you next time. you're feeling pretty lousy right now. so remember that feeling, and let it help you make a different decision next time. speaking just for myself, i seem to need to relearn this lesson periodically.

here's the other thing. you can't change what you did, right? but you CAN change what you do next ... and i'm thinking you already have -- and in a good way. so count me in with everyone else who's encouraging you to get back up on the horse. at the end of the day, it wasn't a really bad fall, and you didn't fall very far.

you can do this. forward we go!