Got the "Look" when i took the elevator

sbinky

I was reading a book the other day called "SPARK" about the advantages of exercise. In it, a PE teacher recounts a story about putting a heart rate monitor on his high school students while they ran/walked a mile.
Afterwards, he had an epiphany of sorts when he looked at the heart rate records of his students.
The girls who had walked the slowest, had the highest heart rates and had infact worked the hardest.
Perhaps,as your weight decreases, taking the stairs just one floor out of 5 could be a goal.

paddlemom

I'm frustrated with some of the replies I see to your thread. I totally understand where you're coming from, and I can tell which posts are by people who have never been as heavy as us. They don't understand the physical pain it causes just to walk from the parking lot to the lobby, let alone climbing stairs. I'd be in tears my lower back in agony... Anyway, it's not that I don't agree that we need exercise, I just know that huffing and puffing and dying in pain on the stairs while skinny ppl watch just isn't my idea of a healthy workout. I probably would have announced that the stairs hurt too much at this point, but once I lose some weight, I'll race ya to the top, given 'em a big grin and pushed the up button!!

Don't let their non-understanding (don't know if that's a word) effect what you're doing negatively. Use it as ammo for your goals. :flowerforyou:

should we all just tell her to continue doing the same thing over and over? people are suggesting that she do something about it...why does that frustrate you?

I'm just saying lets be realistic. I agree we need exercise, and that she shouldn't let them affect her negatively. But saying to someone who is obviously discouraged that they should have done it anyway is counterproductive, especially when that particular exercise is just not a realistic option at this time.

I agree but when you have heard the same thing 10 times or more with no change maybe it is time to take a different approach to the issue. Blaming others never fixes the problem. It isnt stair climbing that is the issue. It would be nice to hear that a walk through the park happened or a walk anywhere happened instead of the same blaming all the time.

even a simple short walk can get the spirits up and the attitude moving in a positive direction.

...except that this wasn't about a group going out for some exercise and making an excuse not to participate; it was about coming back from lunch and choosing the route from the first floor back to the office. At no point did leafylee say she didn't WANT to exercise, she just said that she didn't like getting attitude cause she wasn't able to do 5 flights of stairs. Sometimes I think we all need to get off the soapbox long enough to really see what the issue really is about.

leafylee

i should add that for the last 3 weeks i have been walking 30 minutes per day to work... it's not like I have no goals. it's just some activities are harder than others. i'm not blaming either, just commiserating that it's tough to get motivated when you have situations that make you feel like total crap. for people who are extremely obese and are emotional eater, they understand. for people who have never been in the situation "shut up and exercise and eat better" seems like the perfect solution. unfortunately, it's not that simple.

i thought this forum was about people supporting each other, not chastizing, but i dont think some people differentiate between the 2.

pdxmomof2

Maybe Dave's response to you is his way of being supportive. He isnt one to beat around the bush. Like you said, sometimes people have a hard time telling the difference.

I think the suggestions to take one flight of stairs and then ride the elevator the other 4 is a really great way to start.

You obviously want to lose weight. You will get advice in all different shapes and forms here. Just as you will get it that way from friends, strangers, family...

I have been asked in the past , when is my baby due. Instead of being mad at the person who says it I use it as motivation to make sure that question or those "looks" dont happen again.

Good luck on your journey! :flowerforyou:

3babybeans

i should add that for the last 3 weeks i have been walking 30 minutes per day to work... it's not like I have no goals. it's just some activities are harder than others. i'm not blaming either, just commiserating that it's tough to get motivated when you have situations that make you feel like total crap. for people who are extremely obese and are emotional eater, they understand. for people who have never been in the situation "shut up and exercise and eat better" seems like the perfect solution. unfortunately, it's not that simple.

i thought this forum was about people supporting each other, not chastizing, but i dont think some people differentiate between the 2.

I don't believe anyone has chastized you. You must remember that although part of this website is for support, it draws all sorts of attitudes towards diet, exercise, health, nutrition & life in general. Basically, you're going to get different opinions on how to handle situations such as this. Some of us have seen your journey start & stop & start & stop again so many times that we want to help you. I've honestly never posted to your threads before b/c I didn't think you'd want to hear what I have to say. I think the time has come that you NEED to listen to what some of the "harsher" voices are saying.

You must stop making excuses. Fatstrat suggested a therapist & I have to agree with him. You have some issues that need ironing out that aren't going to get fixed on a message board. If you start by fixing your emotions, the health aspect of it will come easier to you.

I'm not saying this to be mean or to chastize you or to belittle you or to make you feel bad about yourself. I'm saying this as a caring bystander that only wants the best. Sort out your issues, try a little harder every day, see your self worth! You're obviously a very smart individual by reading the way you write. As cliche as it sounds, YOU are worth it.

Best wishes for you & I hope someday you will see that you can accomplish your goals. :flowerforyou:

fatstrat

If you don't want to listen to the advice given here, then by all means, SEE A THERAPIST.

kerrilucko

leafy everyone has to start somewhere and yes, 5 flights is a lot, especially when you have a lot of weight to carry up those stairs. Maybe tomorrow you could go ahead and try just one flight. then elevator the rest of the way. See how that goes, and build up to doing all 5. I've seen you around here since I started and I KNOW you want this and I KNOW it's been really hard for you, and it can get really discouraging. But like I said... everyone has to start somewhere and 1 flight of stairs is a lot better than none right?

jeffwyeg

i thought this forum was about people supporting each other, not chastizing, but i dont think some people differentiate between the 2.

Regardless of what you might think about the responses you've received, I don't think anyone here is chastizing you - just being honest.

And I think that's what all of us need sometimes...and it's probably why all of us are here: because we're honest with ourselves...we've realized that we NEED to make a change and that's why we're all here (I know that's why I'm here).

They say a good trainer will yell at you and make you throw up...think of the MFP community as your "trainer" :happy:

And best of luck on your journey to a healthy lifestyle!

Jeff @ YEG

leafylee

maybe i'm just overly sensitive...

thanks for the advice everyone.

p.s. i have gone to the 3 therapy sessions this year that work will pay for, so unless i get a windfall, i can only get 3 per year...

arewethereyet

maybe i'm just overly sensitive...

thanks for the advice everyone.

p.s. i have gone to the 3 therapy sessions this year that work will pay for, so unless i get a windfall, i can only get 3 per year...

That is great lindsay! I hear OA is a great group, and it is free. If you try a meeting and dont like it, try another in the area to see if the ppl make the difference. I know you are trying, and I am proud of you for walking each day.

Keep up the good work and ignore the idjits!:flowerforyou:

12by311

...it's tough to get motivated when you have situations that make you feel like total crap. for people who are extremely obese and are emotional eater, they understand.

leafy, I hope you will soon be able to sort through your emotional eating issues. This part of your post stood out to me. I understand that it's hard to get motivated in your situation. You feel like you are against all odds. I just wanted to say that everyone....overweight, obese, healthy, skinny....whatever....has issues and situations that we have to deal with. Try to use your personal situation in a positive way to better yourself. Like others have said, using this to help yourself set goals...or using those looks to motivate yourself to push yourself just a little bit more with your walking, exercise, etc. I used to run and run and run thinking about comments people had made to me about my weight gain when I was in college. Maybe that's obsessive. Whatever. It worked.

Honestly, since losing my mom in October, I've had MANY mornings where I didn't want to get up and go to work in the morning....NOT TO MENTION run 5 miles and lift weights afterward. But I do. And I am not a Debbie Downer. I'm generally an easy going, positive person. But I make a conscious effort to be that way.

I wish you the best!

emmie110

When they give you the "look", you give them the "finger".

That's my view too - although with coworkers - I would tell them to pickup 200 pounds and carry it up the stairs. I guarantee they couldn't do it - even for 1 flight. I've lost the weight years ago and then gained it all back. Back then I was walking the parking lot on every break and my lunch hour. It wasn't until I had been doing this for several months that I felt strong enough to try the stairs. You go at your pace and take pride in all the small accomplishments.