Over Eater's Unite~Part 1

ChristyMourning

I have been going back and fourth with food for so long that I feel not in control anymore. I wanted to start a thread/Group on here for OE's and have it different than the typical O.A. Because some people are not spiritual and some people are and I feel like O.A is to compressed into God. We have free will and sometime's something takes over our lives and we have no control until it kills us.
Honestly, I'm tired of restricting only to binge later and then feel sad. It is a never ending circle of abuse on one's self and soul. I feel like I live with this ugly little secret and everyone just lives around my bubble but not inside.
Food is starting to ruin my life. Food is starting to ruin my marriage. And I'm tired of feeling guilty and I WANT TO CHANGE! I SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOF TOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm tired of hiding and crying. I'm tired of feeling like a failure to my family.
I know it will not change over night and there are no quick fixes but I am willing to work on it and I wanted to post my up's and down's of this on going battle and I thought maybe some where out there in computer land that someone was feeling the same way, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Today is May 4th. Today I stand up for my life.

ChristyMourning

I have been going back and fourth with food for so long that I feel not in control anymore. I wanted to start a thread/Group on here for OE's and have it different than the typical O.A. Because some people are not spiritual and some people are and I feel like O.A is to compressed into God. We have free will and sometime's something takes over our lives and we have no control until it kills us.
Honestly, I'm tired of restricting only to binge later and then feel sad. It is a never ending circle of abuse on one's self and soul. I feel like I live with this ugly little secret and everyone just lives around my bubble but not inside.
Food is starting to ruin my life. Food is starting to ruin my marriage. And I'm tired of feeling guilty and I WANT TO CHANGE! I SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOF TOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm tired of hiding and crying. I'm tired of feeling like a failure to my family.
I know it will not change over night and there are no quick fixes but I am willing to work on it and I wanted to post my up's and down's of this on going battle and I thought maybe some where out there in computer land that someone was feeling the same way, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Today is May 4th. Today I stand up for my life.

cc_campbell81

"Today I stand up for my life. " I really like that. I'm with you, good luck.:flowerforyou:

ChristyMourning

"Today I stand up for my life. " I really like that. I'm with you, good luck.:flowerforyou:

Thank you so much. So far I have found a therapist in my area and are looking for treatment and others that are in need of a OE buddy!

godsgrl

My heart really goes out to you, and I TOTALLY understand because I was stuck there for years and years and years. I've heard it called "binge eating disorder" and "disordered irregular eating" and all types of things, but basically what *cured* me was stopping the harsh restricting. It was weird because no one would have ever guessed my dirty little secret because I was never overweight, but food and the shame and false guilt I carried around with me occupied my entire life.

I use to be a nutrition coach (me, of all people) and the lady that started my road to recovery was Ellyn Satter. I heard her speak at a conference regarding the causes of disordered eating in children, and a light bulb went off. Though I wasn't a child, the principles were still the same. Her website use to have some great articles. It may still do so.

I almost fell back into the trap a few years ago. This time instead of the motive to be skinny, I started concentrating on eating healthy and almost went off into the deep end again. I got all caught up into the deprive & binge game. Silly me. As if that is healthy. I learned more quickly that time! I journaled a bit about it in my blog. I'm still working on knowing when I need to say no or yes to a food (sometimes I need to say no to maintain physical health and well-being, but sometimes it is wise to give myself a go-ahead so it doesn't turn into a binge. I guess we are all just works in progress.

I hope you find some answers to the source of your turmoil. The road out is easy as soon as you find the way!

ChristyMourning

My heart really goes out to you, and I TOTALLY understand because I was stuck there for years and years and years. I've heard it called "binge eating disorder" and "disordered irregular eating" and all types of things, but basically what *cured* me was stopping the harsh restricting. It was weird because no one would have ever guessed my dirty little secret because I was never overweight, but food and the shame and false guilt I carried around with me occupied my entire life.

I use to be a nutrition coach (me, of all people) and the lady that started my road to recovery was Ellyn Satter. I heard her speak at a conference regarding the causes of disordered eating in children, and a light bulb went off. Though I wasn't a child, the principles were still the same. Her website use to have some great articles. It may still do so.

I almost fell back into the trap a few years ago. This time instead of the motive to be skinny, I started concentrating on eating healthy and almost went off into the deep end again. I got all caught up into the deprive & binge game. Silly me. As if that is healthy. I learned more quickly that time! I journaled a bit about it in my blog. I'm still working on knowing when I need to say no or yes to a food (sometimes I need to say no to maintain physical health and well-being, but sometimes it is wise to give myself a go-ahead so it doesn't turn into a binge. I guess we are all just works in progress.

I hope you find some answers to the source of your turmoil. The road out is easy as soon as you find the way!

Thank you so much for your words and thoughts. You are too kind. I hope it all works out in the end.