man advice, you know we need it sometimes

stephaneb74

I think you knew the answer to your question when you posted it....
Here you have two ways to go.... 1 is to get out of this relationship that is burning you and find someone that is going to respect yiu for who you are and not only when they want some "benefit"...... 2 is be abrupt about your feeling and ask what he think.... from there either you have an healthy relationship with someone open and committed or you are back to number 1

Either way do something about it .....

Karmynzahringer

If its been two years and you are still at the same point as day 1 (FWB) then I would say that it will never be more than that. Sounds like a *kitten* who is using you for a piece when he is horny and will never view you as anything more. Move on and don't let yourself waste another 2 years on this guy. Seriously I have been there and all it will do is damage your self image, confidence and ability to trust in men.

yaddayaddayadda

Don't go. He's just not that into you. Sorry, but his past behavior shows that. Waste no more time on him!

You are a good person who has lots to offer. Find someone who deserves it!

nixrun

I asked for this advice because deep down I wanted to hear exactly what you all have told me. It's nice to have the reassurance and criticism in life. It's one of the main reasons I have grown to love MFP; some things I cannot even ask my friends because they show too much bias.

I basically dropped a lot of people over the last year that brought a lot of negativity and bad influence in my life. I have set priorities as in obtaining my master's and getting fit before thirty. I find that I have really no desire to go out searching for a relationship because it could interrupt my progress and the goals I have set for myself.

I keep my options open, but just really not interested in a relationship until I get to where I want to be and most importantly feel more comfortable with myself. This may be on of the first times in my life that I am really trying to do things for just me, rather than trying to please everyone else. I apologize if that sounds selfish to any of you.

He's the next step.

Kirsty_UK

all the best whatever you decide

tashakk86

if i were you id play "hard to get" the next time he calls you tell him you have plans or a date.. make him jelous.. if he really likes you you will be able to tell. if you going on a date doesnt affect him.. well he was just in it for the sex.. give him a taste of his own medicine... i was in teh same situation 3 years ago.. the guy i was in love with acted the same way then i gave him a taste of his medicine.. i acted like i oculd care less, i went on dates hung out with friends.. just enjoyed lie.. well that flipped a switch for him.. now 2 years later were living together and getting married in july!!! hope this helped

tashakk86

yea i know theres alot of spelling errors lol my keyboard sux! but you get the idea of what im trying to say

Maystar80

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

^^^^ This exactly. I totally agree. I see a trainwreck in your future if you don't get out. And that comes from personal experience of a similar situation as well....

avalonms

Why am I always the last to post?

You owe me one.

catshark209

You were the last resort girl, all men have them. You'll always be an easy lay in his mind and that's is cause you positioned yourself as such from the get go. Please find your self worth and realize your body and emotional well being are worth more than drinks dinner and 200$. Find someone who take u seriously.

I just asked my ex husband about this and he said the same thing as above. Girl, drop that fool. You can do so much better. :flowerforyou:

starsnyc21

Turn down the sex and see if he remains a really “good guy“. Guys like this only seem great because you’re giving them what they want. When you stop giving him what he wants, he’ll get it from someone else. Try not to read more into the relationship or his actions. Woman get into trouble like that. See it for what it is. He likes you as a friend and you come with a bonus that he doesn’t have to work for. I don't want to sound negative but 2 years it a long time.

sunkisses

If you even have to ask, the answer is "he's not that into you." He's already had as much of a relationship as he's willing to have with you (he gets to do whatever he wants and you can't be angry with him), and he's already had sex with you. There is nothing left for him now.

This is totally going to be a rude and offensive comment but, men are not mysterious or confusing. They're so simple it hurts sometimes. I'm really sorry :frown: And I'm not bitter or a man-hater. In fact, I adore men because they're so simple. I'm just a woman with a lifetime of nothin' but guy-friends.

Elizabeth_C34

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

Listen to this man. He is a smart one!

If all you want is to be the "go to" girl, then that's fine. Nothing really wrong with that as long as you are comfortable with it. You're both adults here, but don't expect anything more from this guy... ever.

LuckyAng

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

Sadly, this. You deserve SO much better

McKayMachina

What do you need advice about?

It sounds like what you want right now. Just enjoy it.

Right?

audigal2008

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

Story of my life/marriage...easier said than done, but toss him

wickedcricket

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

I like this ^ guy. Straight up, you just wasted two years of your life and GOOD years. Don't wait til your my age to wise up. Players play

mdj1501

I think he couldn't get another date for the casinos and he's horny. Your Birthday is a perfect way to get a little and he can look like a good guy by doing something for your birthday. That way you're still out there dangling on a string if he needs a future rematch.

You are not making the rules in this relationship. Your only option is to play or not to play.

Opt out. You can do better.

Ditto... my guess is that he was seeing someone else. it didn't work out so why not schmooze you on your birthday and keep you dangling..... Have you ever seen the movie "He is just not that into you?" You can do SOOOOOOO much better girl!!

mdj1501

He had/has another lady so he walked away from you,when that didn`t work out he wanted to get his FWB back.
If you are cool with this then have at it but sounds like you want more.
Tell him outright and if he says no then walk away and don`t look back.
You will only be miserable and you deserve better.

You read my mind...