Why Can't I Stick To This???

needlework

I really need some help and motivation please. I do really well for a week or a few days longer. I eat better, I put everything in my food diary, I exercise and give it my all and then one day I wake up and don't care! It is so frustrating. I know you have to be mentally ready and strong, but I cannot understand why I do so well and then just stop...for no reason. I like the results I get whne I do the right things, so I can't understans why I can't stick with it. I am getting heavier by the week and that is not something I want to do.

Any suggestions/motivation would be greatly appreciated. Anybody else go through this?? I really need to get this weight off. I know how to do it, but I can't make myself!!!


HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tina9988

Try taking a real hard look at why you are heavy. Think back to a time when you were happy with your weight and put the pieces together. There is a reason that you are afraid to lose the weight, you just need to look for it. I catch myself doing the same thing. I will be close to a milestone and then I will backslide then I refocus and continue. Once you understand "the why" the rest will fall into place. Keep trying, one of these days it will stick. Good luck to you.

livelaughlove2012

Hi needlework! Sounds like you and I are going through the same thing. I started about a month ago, and did very well the first week. I lost 5 lbs. Then something happened and I stopped logging in and started giving in to the cravings. So far, I have gained 2 lbs. back, but i hate back sliding!!! I'm like you, I really want to get this weight off and keep it off. I too desperately need encouragement. I have been hanging on to old clothes for over 5 years because I won't buy any new ones that are sized bigger. So I have punished myself for years, and I'M TIRED OF IT!!! I've missed out on new styles, colors, and fashions because of it. So, I try to keep focused on a new wardrobe and I have a wedding to attend this summer. I want to wear a cute sundress and not show any back fat or love handles when I wear it. So, Think of something you really want , the real reason for wanting to lose the weight. When you get ready to binge, like I do, put that picture in your mind and move away quickly, to do something else. That's the only way I can do this!!! Please encourage me, and i will gladly encourage you!!!! I'm praying for discipline for the both of us!!!

needlework

bump - anybody else want to chime in....i could use more advise/suggestions, please.

bunnysone

jump on board with my friend challenge

I am challenging all of my friends to burn AT LEAST 200 calories EVERY DAY. That is a simple walk for most people.

When 50% of my friends can burn 200 calories or more each 24 hour period, then I'll up the number of calories.

We're currently at 35%. Feel free to join in on my friends list and participate - feeling like you are part of a team will keep you motivated to keep going

gemiwing

What do you want?

I don't mean- 'I want to lose weight'. I mean what do you want?

I want to run, I want to be able to hop on one leg to the other, I want to know I can at least try a sport out in public without having people mock me for my size. I want to shop where the clothes are cheaper lol

What do you want?

How are you going to get it? Please, don't starve yourself or listen to people who are going to tell you it's ok to starve yourself because you have a large goal. Figure out your TDEE- take fifteen to twenty percent off that and eat those cals. You don't have to be perfect, you don't have to eat a certain 'type' of food. You can even still eat fast food if you want to- and some days you will. I still eat chocolate because I like to

swisspea

sometimes I struggle with the same thing. It's just important to dust yourself off and get back to it after a slip-up. Try to rid your house of all the trigger foods, and think to the emotional side of eating, as another poster wrote. Keep your hands busy as well, with crafts or whatever.

Also, go Jays go!

bump - anybody else want to chime in....i could use more advise/suggestions, please.

akiramezu

What is it that you want to achieve?
What is it that you are?
You're FKing human
You are god's ultimate creation
You can aspire to be what you want to be
To do what you want to do
Because that is what we are
We are the ones that move forward in life
the ones that create, but not just materialistic things
but we create a purpose for ourselves
WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE?
WHAT IS YOUR GOAL?
WE CREATE OUR OWN DESTINY
don't whine and BTCH about it being too tough
Because life is tough
And we don't get no where in life without hard work and determination
That is the key to success
The key to being great
Being great isn't the title you own, or the pay check you get
Being great is being what you wanted to be
You want to create a better you
So that you can do what you want to do
To strive to achieve
This pain you feel is temporary
That greatness you achieved is forever
Your mind, reflects your body and your soul
If you change your mind, your body will change
We're human being for FK sakes
Take it! ITS YOURS
FK THE WORLD
FK SOCIETY
FK THE POLICE
Society will tell you to step down
your friends will doubt you
BUT BE DIFFERENT
IT"S OKAY
WE ARE UNIQUE
we all have our talents and our gifts
our individualism, our uniqueness
nobody is without these things
The obstacles you face may look devasting
but to over come it, you must be brave
don't be scared to take chances, to take risks
half the time, you'll fall ... get knocked the FK down and demolished
but get back up and try again
we are AWLAYS STRONGER than we know
we are GREATER than what we set out to be


Hope my words motivate you. (:

Modified version of my poem
http://epicpoet.tumblr.com/post/8688930322/human#note-container

Pezii

I have pictures on inspirational quotes all over on my bedroom wall, I also think of the reason why I want to lose weight which is for Cosplay and then I get happy and motivated.

annabellj

You definitely need to dig a little deeper to realize why you want it. For me, if I dont log every day and exercise most days, I know that I will not reach my goals. I want to be healthy yes and be here a long time for my family, but deep down I want to look good! I have never felt so confident and looked this good ever in my life so I want to keep going! When I get comfortable enough with my clothes off as I am with my clothes on then I know I have made it. Sometimes it is very hard to realize that we have to do this every day. it gets discouraging and does take a lot of work. but in the end the results speak for them selves. I have ab muscles! and dont rely on the scale all the time. it lies. try to call a friend or rely on your friends on here if you are feeling that way. I have some of the best friends on mfp!

catcrazy

Do you by any chance start all gung ho, healthy food, dramatic cut in calories and exercising like a demon?


If so then thats your problem.

Small steps. Start off logging your food, the good the bad and the downright ugly, get that habit licked then change a couple of things a week within that. Knock the calories down but don't drop from silly high to silly low. Get the calories under control for a while first then start working on quality of calories.

Up your exercise but if none is your normal then build up gradually.

Big strides tend to cause stumbles in many so aim for steady baby steps and you'll get there faster

MMarvelous

Have you set measurable goals. If your are trying to lose 100lbs and only lose 1-5lbs a week mentally it can be discouraging. Set a monthly weight lose goal and join in on some challenges which give you additional short term goals. WRITE YOUR GOALS on your MFP page and update them monthly. The recommended challenges are to keep you focused and committed as well as added support for this life style change. Add one new goal a week or change it.

Example increase water intake from 64 oz to 80oz a day, eat 3 veggies and burn 1000 calories a week. These are measurable unlike drink lots or more water, eat more fruits and veggies or workout more. Have a written plan that is open for modification as you take this journey.

annabellj

What is it that you want to achieve?
What is it that you are?
You're FKing human
You are god's ultimate creation
You can aspire to be what you want to be
To do what you want to do
Because that is what we are
We are the ones that move forward in life
the ones that create, but not just materialistic things
but we create a purpose for ourselves
WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE?
WHAT IS YOUR GOAL?
WE CREATE OUR OWN DESTINY
don't whine and BTCH about it being too tough
Because life is tough
And we don't get no where in life without hard work and determination
That is the key to success
The key to being great
Being great isn't the title you own, or the pay check you get
Being great is being what you wanted to be
You want to create a better you
So that you can do what you want to do
To strive to achieve
This pain you feel is temporary
That greatness you achieved is forever
Your mind, reflects your body and your soul
If you change your mind, your body will change
We're human being for FK sakes
Take it! ITS YOURS
FK THE WORLD
FK SOCIETY
FK THE POLICE
Society will tell you to step down
your friends will doubt you
BUT BE DIFFERENT
IT"S OKAY
WE ARE UNIQUE
we all have our talents and our gifts
our individualism, our uniqueness
nobody is without these things
The obstacles you face may look devasting
but to over come it, you must be brave
don't be scared to take chances, to take risks
half the time, you'll fall ... get knocked the FK down and demolished
but get back up and try again
we are AWLAYS STRONGER than we know
we are GREATER than what we set out to be


Hope my words motivate you. (:

Modified version of my poem
http://epicpoet.tumblr.com/post/8688930322/human#note-container

I love this!

akiramezu

I love this!

thanks =]

chrishgt4

For me - it wasn't a weight loss thing, but I think it still applies.

I used to be super skinny and my diet consisted pretty much of junk food.

I decided one day I was going to eat healthier and replaced snacks with fruit. That was my first small step.

I got so much extra energy and felt so much better that it soon became a subconscious decision to pick healthy food over unhealthy because I genuinely WANTED it more.

I remember one day when we had a buffet at work. When it was mostly eaten and there were some bits left on a tray for people to pick at, I was walking past. I picked up the satsuma, not because I felt I should, but just without thinking that was my preference. There were pork pies, scotch eggs, bags of crisps and mini rolls on there and I genuinely didn't want them.

I didn't think about it until I sat back at my desk to eat the satsuma it hit me that clearly I had made a fundamental change to my attitude.

From there I wanted to make more changes because of how good it made me feel.

Work on making that fundamental change in attitude. You're going to have slip up days where you don't care.

But think of it this way - in the past, every day was like a slip up day. Even if you only make an effort one day a week, you're still better than you were. The more you do it, the easier it becomes.

Good luck.

needlework

Thanks everyone who posted advice/suggestions. Sounds like I have some soul searching to do. I appreciate the time you all took to help me out. Now, TIME TO GET SEROUS! Thanks everyone and have a great day!!!

bryonysten

I feel your pain. I have been losing and regaining the same 20 pounds for about the last 12 years.

This time though it feels different. I am motivated to use this site and track every day. I like challenging myself to stay within my calories (including eating back my exercise calories) and I'm definitely much more focused because I track every day.

I also happen to weigh myself everyday - no judging please - and found this website that another posted recommended a great motivation as it shows you that you're going in the right direction even if the scales aren't moving http://www.myweightracker.com/home

I also find I have to watch / read a lot of articles and advice to keep me focused - suggest you do the same.

Also, for me, although people seem to love to tell me that I won't be 'me' if I lose weight, that my character will change, that I'll be less fun, I know that if I see any more photos of me where I think I look godawful and other people say 'you look lovely' or 'thats you!' I'll cry.

When I look in the mirror I don't think I look that bad, but sadly the camera doesn't lie.

A couple of other things to try - have you done the 'jiggle test'? Stand naked infront of a mirror and jump up and down.. eugh right?

I have a motivation that I will see most of my friends and family in just over 4 months time. By then I would like to be a good 20lbs or less (plus the 6 I have already lost). I suggest you choose a date or a focus and work towards it. Only having a non specific goal like 'I want to lose weight / be slim' isn't enough, it needs to be SMART....

Good luck - and remember, if you're not focused on it, then maybe now isn't the right time to be doing it. You have to really really want to do it to be successful in peeling the pounds off. You can't just eat less calories for a finite time, it needs to be a mind shift and change...

jlgosling

Lots of reasons, for me I have good and bad weeks during my monthly cycle. Straight after I start my period and again straight after ovulation I have high motivation and commitment, the other two weeks I have to have a back up plan in place. i.e. give into chocolate cravings, but exercise more, cut down in other areas i.e. indulge for a day or two without going miles above the calorie intake.

Also - there are other ebb and flow factors, motivation will come and go, question is can you be kind to yourself when it's ebbing?

I am just approaching a stone lost - and it's taken nearly a year, I've had great losses and then months and months of stalling, and I'm still on the journey, the weight is still moving in the right direction and I lose weight when I'm ready.

A friend recommended the Dukan diet, which I'm not doing, but reading the book was an eye opener in that he says that the body has to learn how to be at the new weight, and for every 1lb lost, it takes 5 days for the body to get used to it. So I've gone from nearly 16 stone, to now 15, my body has got used to being 15 rather than 15.12 and now it's ready to move on again. And just like that I'm motivated and losing weight.

This is a patience game, and hope and acceptance.

Big hugs to everyone out there on this journey.

Jane

leaso75581

good advice!! I am not a big fan of journaling, but recently I began one, and I'm making all sorts of inner discoveries as to why I self-sabotage!

honeyb7

To help me stay focused and on track I have been educating myself. These are the books I have read to help me with this very situation. "Change Anything: The science behind personal success" by Kerry Patterson and "Change your Brain Change Your Body" by Dr. Daniel Amen.
These books give me tools that I have been able to use everyday to help me understand this process and realize that it's really hard to change without educating ourselves to a whole new way of thinking. Our old patterns of behavior are so powerful, we easily slip back into them without even realizing it and then sabotaging our goals and self esteem, so that the old negative thought, "see, I knew you couldn't do it" wins over our new thought of, "yes you can!"

Other books that have been useful to the journey:
"Excuses be gone" by Dr. Wayne Dyer
"The Quantum Wellness Cleanse, A 21 Day Essential Guide to Healing your Body, Mind and Spirit" by Kathy Freston

All the best,
MB

taylorblues

Bump! want to read this after I've walked the dogs.....I've been a bit of a yo-yo dieter in the past but trying to stop that with the use of this site.