Favorite Seinfeld Quotes

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  • jessikhi
    jessikhi Posts: 2
    1) Prickly Pete... can't remember the other :(
  • binky610
    binky610 Posts: 17
    1) Prickly Pete... can't remember the other :(
    Prickly Pete & Snoopy! :laugh:

    Jerry (wearing the puffy shirt): But I don't want to be a pirate!
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    SERENITY NOW! Insanity later...
  • BullDozier
    BullDozier Posts: 237 Member
    I love being able to slip an arcane Seinfeld quote into everyday conversation. I was playing pickup basketball on Sunday, and a girl playing with us wanted to do rock-paper-scissors for ball to start each game. I beat her with rock two games in a row, and the following conversation ensued:

    her: Ugh, why do you always pick rock?
    Me: 'Cause, nothing beats rock.
    Her: Umm...paper beats rock (in a "you're an idiot tone).
    Me: Rock flies right through paper!
    Her (now really condesingly): No, paper wraps around rock.
    Me: Sorry...it's a Seinfeld reference.
  • LauraMacNCheese
    LauraMacNCheese Posts: 7,173 Member
    George: So she coughed.

    Jerry: Coughing? Naked? It's a turn-off, man.

    George: Everything goes with naked.

    Jerry: When you cough there are thousands of unseen muscles that suddenly spring into action. It's like watching that fat guy catch a cannonball in his stomach in slow motion.

    George: You're spoiled spoiled, man. You know how much mental energy I expend just trying to picture women naked?

    Jerry: But the thing you don't realize is that there's good naked and bad naked. Naked hair brushing - good. Naked crouching - bad.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    In addition to all the above:

    Sex to SAVE the friendship. Well if we have to, we have to. (Jerry to Elaine)

    Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it. It's too risky. Ya get a sense of it and then you look away.

    I'm not sure, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I think I see... a nipple. (The one with the Christmas card)

    You can't eat this soup standing up. Your knees buckle. (Loved the episode with the soup)

    Always laughed at the way Jerry and Newman greeted one another, you could hear the tension every time.
    "Hello Jerry" "Hello Newman"

    There is no bigger loser than me! (George)

    *Remember the episode where Jerry couldn't remember the woman's name. The whole episode he is trying to figure it out....I don't remember it either!!! Do any of you remember?

    *The whole episode with the chicken place across the street...had me in stitches.
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    snapple?
  • mama2shi
    mama2shi Posts: 300 Member
    "I was in the pool!" Hahahahaha....

    LOL...poor Georgie!
  • jaric01
    jaric01 Posts: 132 Member
    A George, divided against itself, Cannot Stand!
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    Seinfeld, pahty of foh?
  • LauraMacNCheese
    LauraMacNCheese Posts: 7,173 Member
    *Remember the episode where Jerry couldn't remember the woman's name. The whole episode he is trying to figure it out....I don't remember it either!!! Do any of you remember?

    He calls her "Mulva" and then after she storms out, he suddenly remembers...runs to the window & yells "Dolores!!!!"
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,290 Member
    Someone should understand the reference, but I can't find the direct quote...
    Jerry was dating a gal that instead of laughing would say "That's funny." while smiling and nodding.
    Jerry broke up with her and "she didn't say that's sad, she actually cried."
  • juan23sfa
    juan23sfa Posts: 22
    George: ............."Listen to this. Marcy comes over and she tells me that her ex-boyfriend was over late last night and 'yada yada yada I'm really tired today.' You don't think she'd yada yada sex?"

    Elaine: .............. "I've yada yada'd sex."

    Jerry:....................."Really?"

    Elaine:..............."Yeah. I met this lawyer, we went out to dinner, I had the lobster bisque, we went back to my place, yada yada yada, I never heard from him again."

    Jerry:..................."But you yada yada'd over the best part."

    Elaine:................."No, I mentioned the bisque."
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    *Remember the episode where Jerry couldn't remember the woman's name. The whole episode he is trying to figure it out....I don't remember it either!!! Do any of you remember?

    He calls her "Mulva" and then after she storms out, he suddenly remembers...runs to the window & yells "Dolores!!!!"

    Thanks!! I laughed till I nearly fell in the floor over that one.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
    George: ............."Listen to this. Marcy comes over and she tells me that her ex-boyfriend was over late last night and 'yada yada yada I'm really tired today.' You don't think she'd yada yada sex?"

    Elaine: .............. "I've yada yada'd sex."

    Jerry:....................."Really?"

    Elaine:..............."Yeah. I met this lawyer, we went out to dinner, I had the lobster bisque, we went back to my place, yada yada yada, I never heard from him again."

    Jerry:..................."But you yada yada'd over the best part."

    Elaine:................."No, I mentioned the bisque."

    And she says it so seriously!! Makes it even more funny
  • treetop57
    treetop57 Posts: 1,578 Member
    Seinfeld, pahty of foh?

    That's actually the first episode I ever saw. The whole time I was thinking, "What the heck is this show? Nothing is happening." Luckily I watched again and eventually got hooked. Which reminds me of another favorite line:

    GEORGE: The show is about nothing.

    . . . .

    (NBC) RUSSELL: Well, why am I watching it?

    GEORGE: Because it’s on TV.

    (NBC) RUSSELL: Not yet.
  • treetop57
    treetop57 Posts: 1,578 Member
    the Manzier...

    You mean the Bro.
  • JSheehy1965
    JSheehy1965 Posts: 404
    The seas were angry that day, my friend
  • oh_mg
    oh_mg Posts: 35 Member
    I flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.
  • fmf525
    fmf525 Posts: 6 Member
    "Of course...absolute zero!"

    When George gives up sex and becomes a genius...he learned Portuguese overnight...:laugh:
  • BDMCKEY
    BDMCKEY Posts: 5 Member
    I driving the bus with one hand and fighting the robber off with the other.
  • treetop57
    treetop57 Posts: 1,578 Member
    Well, people kept ringing the bell!
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member

    I can beat ANYONE at Seinfeld trivia, btw. :tongue:

    I don't know...I'm pretty good. What are the names of George's horses when he lies to Susan's parents and says he has a place in the Hamptons?
    Snoopy and Prickly Pete. :tongue:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    George: "I'm much more comfortable criticizing people behind their backs."
  • showtime11
    showtime11 Posts: 17
    THERE WAS SHRINKAGE!!!
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    Costanza: You wanted to see me, Mr. Steinbrenner
    Steinbrenner: Yes, George, come in, come in....

    My name is George, I'm unemployed and live with my parents.
    Hi, I'm Victoria
  • BDMCKEY
    BDMCKEY Posts: 5 Member
    "The Bro"
  • tbskipp
    tbskipp Posts: 180 Member
    JERK STORE! The line is JERK STORE!!!!!
    :laugh:
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Elaine: "Fake Fake Fake Fake" (When she and Jerry were talking about faking orgasms)

    And the episode where Jerry dates the woman with MAN HANDS!!

    I love this show!!!!
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