Have you tried GLP1 medications and found it didn't work for you? We'd like to hear about your experiences, what you tried, why it didn't work and how you're doing now. Click here to tell us your story

I'm not disgusting

paulaGetshealthy
paulaGetshealthy Posts: 464
in Chit-Chat
It's been a long time coming, and I never thought I'd say this, but I am BEAUTIFUL. And I mean it!

I have had low self-esteem my entire life, because I am fat, and because I am boring, and because I am gross, and because I am short, and weird, and...

Yeah, I always thought these things about myself. I lost all this weight, and my self esteem only improved for a little while. I felt better about myself because others gave me positive feed back. I became addicted to the feedback. Then I became obsessed with the feedback. I wanted more. More. More. I need to lose more weight to get more. I need to lose more weight NOW.

I'd starve myself, binge, take laxatives, spend 3 hours at the gym each day, starve myself, binge, laxatives, gym, starve, binge, binge, binge, binge.

Eating Disorder.

I'm doing a million things to stop my eating disorder from developing even further (meetings, therapy, self-esteem books, daily affirmations for self-esteem, faith in God), but I've finally come to the realization that I am an amazing human being.

I like to make others smile. I'm beautiful. I have great legs, and thighs. I have a pretty smile, and shiny eyes. I'm graceful. I'm smart. I'm a great writer, and a cute little bookworm. I like to sit in the sun, on the porch, with my feet dangling down. I like to color. I like walking around Sephora and Ulta even if I don't buy anything. I like hanging out with my guy cousin and shopping for home furnishings for his new house. I like to rake leaves. :) I like me. No, no...I LOVE me.

Replies

  • StrawberrySt
    StrawberrySt Posts: 235
    Honey, you ARE beautiful.

    WAY TO GO GIRL!!

    I love that you have had the confidence to share this. Just shows how self confident you now are.

    Your list of the great things about you is inspiring :flowerforyou:
  • Firefighter_Jay
    Firefighter_Jay Posts: 426 Member
    You both are ****ing hot. I'll be honest :)
  • londanfudd4eva
    londanfudd4eva Posts: 138
    u certainly r beautiful i can see that ,more importantly im glad u c that now.:smooched:
  • goodhealth2012
    goodhealth2012 Posts: 85
    This should be in the motivation section cause it motivated me! It bought tears to my eyes hearing you say nice things about yourself. I hope I can get to that point one day. Congrats :)
  • katiej122
    katiej122 Posts: 125 Member
    This makes me really happy! I'm really really glad for you, you should never feel disgusting ever again, you deserve a lot better.

    :smile:
  • goodhealth2012
    goodhealth2012 Posts: 85
    This should be in the motivation section cause it motivated me! It bought tears to my eyes hearing you say nice things about yourself. I hope I can get to that point one day. Congrats :)
  • shutterbabe
    shutterbabe Posts: 124 Member
    YES you ARE beautiful! :bigsmile: We are our hardest critics, and we often down ourselves. People need to remember all of the good qualities and features about themselves instead of dwelling on negatives. Good for you! I myself could learn to love myself more. It's a struggle sometimes. Making a list like you did is a good start...I think I'll do that. :smile: Thank you!
  • paulaGetshealthy
    paulaGetshealthy Posts: 464
    Thanks ladies and fella :)

    Honestly, old me would reply to those "rate the person above you" threads to get feedback, but now I'm like, "wtf? I don't need anyone else to tell me whether I'm attractive!"

    I'm a nice person, who is willing to help others.

    I'm training to become a personal trainer to help others become healthy and happy, and I think my weight-loss and my eating disorder struggles will help me be able to help my clients even better. And that makes me an incredible human being :)
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    You ARE beautiful!
  • transfixedtoast
    transfixedtoast Posts: 89 Member
    I love you aswell :)
  • KrisyKat
    KrisyKat Posts: 740 Member
    Honestly, old me would reply to those "rate the person above you" threads to get feedback, but now I'm like, "wtf? I don't need anyone else to tell me whether I'm attractive!"

    I'm a nice person, who is willing to help others.

    I'm training to become a personal trainer to help others become healthy and happy, and I think my weight-loss and my eating disorder struggles will help me be able to help my clients even better. And that makes me an incredible human being :)

    Kudos to you!! Your positivity is both inspiring and contagious!! Smile, sweetie- beauty comes from the :heart:
  • lorijh72
    lorijh72 Posts: 118 Member
    Your so beautiful...it's been a long bumpy road for you and its finally getting patched! Love yourself everyday, every minute of each day! You deserve and owe it to yourself!
  • paulaGetshealthy
    paulaGetshealthy Posts: 464
    xoxo!

    The best compliments are those that are about my INNER-beauty! Those are hard to come by, so I have to compliment myself every day. I want to shine with confidence! :)

Categories