Not what I'm used to.....

ChinaLexie

As human beings, we all crave the same things: Security, comfort, meaning, love, control and much more. Yet, in many ways, I have foregone MUCH of these for a new life abroad.

In return, I have gained a new sense of awareness. I realize comfort means different things in different countries. I've learned love is more of an action than a feeling and to really 'love' is to set aside self for others. And in China, control is almost completely out of the picture.

I am a 26 year old teaching in Northeastern China and the life I lead is comparable to a bad action movie mixed with a comedy.

So, knowing that, I am wondering if ANYONE has experienced anything like the life I lead? I am surrounded by skinny Asians. Seriously, 99.7% of the girls at my college are size 00-04. If they are anything above a 4, they are taunted, called "fat" relentlessly and are made to feel like failures by their friends. FRIENDS! In fact, many of my students only eat breakfast and lunch, skipping dinner, because they believe they are fat. Reminder: these girls are American size 0-4.

I have been told by students that I have "baby" or "heavy" or just tonight a Chinese friend said to me, "Alex, you should not eat so much at night if you want to lose this" and slapped my butt. (Sidenote: we had JUST left dinner, I ate WAY less than her and yet, was made to feel like a failure.)

I have virtually no support, no access to a gym, find myself with heaps of pressure because I'm a foreigner in China, and am very much reminded I am NOT thin. (I am a size 6/8 in America--weighing 140 at 5'4). I carry MOST of my weight in my butt and boobs, so it's been a ROUGH stretch living in the land of F.L.A.T!

If you feel you lack support or just need someone in the same boat as you (whether or not you live in China) feel free to add me or send a message.

I took for granted just how much more control I had in America. I decided when to eat out, what to eat, etc... In China, I have NO idea how many calories are in the food and often times do not order what I want because I eat with students and always let them order. It's been a rough year in terms of body image, but I have to believe I am stronger than my surroundings.

If you are in America, be SO grateful for the foods choices catering to weight loss! Be grateful for gyms! Dinners UNDER 2,000 mg's of salt! Workout buddies! Oh, the list goes on!

So, I give you all my support, because I don't have much. Good luck!!

lizard053

Sorry to hear you are struggling. However, a lot of the diet in China is so much better than what we eat in the US. All my Chinese coworkers are skinny, save for one (and he just loves to eat, and he admitted freely to it). And the tendency to stretch out a meal, having a bite here and a bite there is also so much better! I'm learning a lot from my Chinese coworkers as to how to eat! Not always what to eat, but definitely how! They are the same as you, only in reverse! LOL!

I'm here if you need a friend!

ChelleDJM

I have no experience comparable to what you are going though. I will say that you are GORGEOUS! I am sorry that you are being teased for your "American-ness" in shape and size. That does not seem fair in the least. Wow, they would fall over dead at my 6' 300-pound self!! I would try to stick to steam veggies whenever you can. They have to have pretty healthy food for how small they are, right? Fond friends to hang out with who will be friends to you, not the ones that call you large. That's crazy.