work and family and no time for me HELP

journeybegins

I am 46 and need to loose about 30lbs to feel great. More then the weight I want to feel good about how I look. There was a time when I managed a health club and would run for miles back in the day. Now I work and drive kids around never anytime for simple things for me. My house is a mess and I have no energy by the end of the day to do anything about it. Just want to feel more accomplished in not just weight lose but with energy to get done the things I need to do. Friends with support to push onward and upward would be great!

korsicash

I would talk to your DR about starting on some B vitamins and get some energy back. I have a toddler, a house to clean, a husband who works opposite shift, and a full time job. I hear your pain on tired. I do hour long exercise videos at night, or during nap time and recently let him have a small space and the lighter toning sticks so the little one could zumba with mommy. It is hard but don't give up! B vitamins help me a lot to get going.

Sissy1964

Journey - I hear ya. But real friends will tell you the "no time" thing just doesn't cut it anymore. They'll also tell you to check in with the doc first and make sure your lack of energy isn't due to a deficiency of some kind. All that being said...how do you know what kid needs to be where? How do you know what tasks need doing at work? How do you you remember to pay a bill?

Is there a schedule, a calendar? Put yourself on it ! Give the kids chores, turn music on instead of tv...rock it out!

Just some thoughts, here for ya journey. :drinker:

has001

It is very hard to balance out the time thing. My husband has always worked opposite shifts than me since before we were married. Now that we have a toddler who is very active, there are many times that I'm tired after work too. But the important thing is to remember to eat right and drink plenty of water. I have found since I've been doing better to my body, I have had tons more energy. It also helps to be a good communicator with your spouse. If they know what you need or want to do for yourself; they will find a way to support you. Hope that you can find some "me" time and find some solace in that fact that you're not alone!

journeybegins

Thank you for your support. Your right I do need to try more vitamins, supplements. Been there with the toddlers, now a teenager and preteen for my kids. They are great and can take care of themselves, but they still need support in a different way that can also be time consuming.

Fairysoul

I felt that way for a long time, but i started forcing myself to get up and go. Now when the kids go to bed I clean up the house (the trick is to get it clean and do simple maintnence everyday I keep a schedule of small things to do each day) and then I workout. I also do outside things with the kids, walks and hiking.... I never had time, and even as tired and cranky as it made me, I am now used to it and have more energy, I am no longer cranky about it either. You can message me if you need to talk!

Fairysoul

Also your kids sound old enough to have a few chores around the house, have you considered this?

lindaharen

You know what take a deep breath and don't be so hard on yourself, can you get up 15 minutes ahead of the kids and do some Yoga streaches to get going. Be good to yourself first

getfitwithangela

Keep at it! Small steps every day! I think we get tired because we don't exercise and eat the right foods! Once you start doing that - the energy gets better! It's a vicious cycle but putting ourselves BACK on the priority list will help!! I also think the messy house goes hand in hand with it all! Feel better - do better!! Take charge and get back at it ONE DAY at a time!! We are worth it!!! Go you!!!

rob_v

Agree w/ the other posters - talk to your doc about being run down.

The other thing is time management. Make a schedule for things and stick to it. Go to bed 1/2 hr earlier and wake up 1/2 hr earlier to give you that "me" time. Do be afraid to say no to things (This one is HUGE - too many of us are pleasers, and say yes to everything, if this is you, DO NOT BE AFRAID TO SAY NO). Do something like MFP and document your schedule for a week and see where your spending your time. My wife was spending a ton of time take our daughter to gymnastics and waiting for her. Found out there was running trails right behind the gym. Now she knocks out her run while my daughter is at gym.

We have 3 kids, both work full time and both training for an ironman. It take some scheduling logistics to say the least. But we make it work. I don't know what I would do w/out Google calendar!

Kincar

I was in a similar situation. I'm 44, work 50+ hours every week, with two children at home.

During my annual check up, I spoke with my doctor about my stress level. She is around my age so she understands and was very helpful. We are at the age when hormones start changing and can affect energy levels. I also spoke with my husband about it. He stepped up and started making dinner & cleaning it up most days. That gave me time to workout. Exercise has been a life saver for me. I started feeling so much better about everything. My stress level went way down. Things like cleaning didn't feel like such a burden anymore.

I'll send you a friend request.

JoeD1968

I would say start first on holding your calorie goals,then squeeze in exercise as you have time.
Driving kids around usually means a pick up time too,so you should have some time in between.
Hard juggle i know but there's time there to be had if ya want it bad enough

Tall_E

I agree with those who are saying you should see a doctor to make sure you don't have a deficiency or illness and definitely add the supplements as you are probably going through at least perimenopause which can play whack with your energy and body shape. After years of just forcing myself to keep going, I finally saw a doctor and learned that I have Fibromyalgia so there was a good reason I was dragging so much!

Having run a health club, I'm sure you know lots of ways to organize your time, etc. I suggest you add appointments with yourself to your schedule though and use that time to rest, meditate, exercise, check in with friends and such. It might sound strange, but you need to be your first priority instead of your children especially since they are somewhat independent. After all, if you aren't alright, then what happens to them? And you are worth it...

smplycomplicated

You are exactly where i used to be. I felt there was just no time what so ever for me. once i got done with everything else i had to get done there was no time left. Whats different from that me and the me now is i make time. I had totally bought into the "i'm not important enough" Now I wake up and feed my dragons their greens, I let the dogs out to use the bathroom, i grab a bottle of water and i get my workout in. I wake up an hour earlier than i used to...get my workout in before my day officially starts..by then my daughter is getting up..it's breakfast then we start school..I homeschool until around 12 or 1, and then it's lunch. after i make her lunch and i grab something..i throw stuff in the wash, and do the household things that -have- to be done daily. then i get my afternoon workout in.

I have learned to not do everything every single day..that was my biggest challenge..i'm a very neat and tidy person, so putting off certain things until the weekend was hard for me. My house is still very clean, but i do put some things off until saturday or sunday..that way i have extra time for ME. because I am important. Taking care of me is more important than a load of towels, or leaving the lunch dishes sitting until after my workout.

I taking the time to get in even a small workout...take multi vitamins..and eat...that was a big one for me..i was so busy doing for everyone else i rarely took the time to eat a meal during the day..There comes a time when you realize that although we are extremely busy in our day to day life..If we don't take the time to take care of ourselves then we won't be around to be extremely busy.

dreawest

Thank you for your support. Your right I do need to try more vitamins, supplements. Been there with the toddlers, now a teenager and preteen for my kids. They are great and can take care of themselves, but they still need support in a different way that can also be time consuming.

At the age your kids are now you can involve them. Say that you want to be more fit and would appreciate their support. Maybe you can spend time with them doing some physical activities like biking or going to the pool. Even if you just tell them whats going on with you and that you are struggling to meet your goals they may provide the occasional reminder you need. I am sure they would feel happy that you trust them to be there for you and that you are sharing your personal struggles with them.

journeybegins

You guys have been wonderful. THANK YOU ALL!!! What a great support system and all things will be considered.

My son is actually the reason I am on the site. Due to a class in school he has to log in everyday. He encouraged me to do it with him. I am afraid I haven't been much of a support to him. Hope to change that as well.

The kids do help some around the house with direction. Just need to have us all work harder together.

Thank you all again for your support.