Depression caused from living alone

auticus

http://www.cnn.com/2012/03/23/health/living-alone-depression/index.html?hpt=hp_bn10

Some interesting thoughts. I know for me, I live alone and have lived alone for most of my life through a combination of me being difficult to live with (which is also why I have been predominantly single) and because I have little desire to live with someone else (I require my time alone and not having to be on someone else's agenda / clock) Does this contribute to depression? I think it can. Part of me wants to be "normal' but the other part rallies against it just as hard. The difference here though is that I'm one of the minority that is not on any medication for depression. I realize I'm just an *kitten* who ultimately has little patience to play the social game and keep up the facades one needs to do so. Why am I posting this on a fitness site? Because your mental fitness is just as important as your six pack abs.

I also, having been a psychology student, understand that humans are not programmed to live or be alone, and those of us that predominantly are are considered "abnormal", much like those of us who are predominantly in our own worlds view those that need to be constantly social as abnormal lol

Someone once defined depression as the moment you stop losing social validation / reinforcement (note all of the validation / reinforcement that you see in this site's very forums or on your friends' feeds). I think depression comes about a lot when what you want/expect fails to materialize and you are saddened by that. I think chronic depression is the lack of ability to cope with going against the grain. It seems the fix to depression that people look for is a happy bulging social life and perfect significant other. If the root, therefore, is locked within judging yourself based off of comparisons to others who have what you want, it would seem the root will always be there, and thus depression always be there if you can't cope with constantly comparing yourself.

Specialkayrina

I tried living alone once (for about a year), and I found myself turning the TV or radio on just to have some voices around me..It sucked. Never again!

Saruman_w

I live pretty much alone. All day every day. I can tolerate it but I don't like it. So far I don't feel depressed but if I keep this up for much longer no telling when it could hit. I guess I have gotten sorta used to it but I certainly don't want to live like this forever.

ItsCasey

I live alone, and I enjoy it. I also rarely "go out" with friends beyond dinner or a movie or something tame because most single people my age do not know how to socialize without getting completely wasted. And that's just not my thing. But I don't consider myself to be depressed. I don't feel sad to not be around people all the time. I have no problem going out and doing things by myself (and many times, I prefer that). I think it makes me "weird," but I don't really care. I like my life.

I would like to find the right man, and I would make room for him in my life (not in my house, unless we were married), but I'm not really looking for new friends. I either click instantly with people as friends , or I never click with them, and I'm just tired of meeting women who are more concerned with whether their pantyline is showing than with the fact that Congress hasn't passed a budget in 3 years. I would rather be weird by myself than develop a tolerance for "friends" like that.

mznisaelaine

I've been living alone for almost 4 years now so I'm pretty much use to it and while I'm single I prefer it that way.. So I'm not depressed but I know that it's only a temporary situation until..... whenever is the day I get married lol

clydethecat

i enjoyed living alone. i have lived with roommates, but i'm not the kind of person that really likes being around other people. then i met my husband and found out he was a loner, kind of like me. it was fate that we found each other. i have found that living with him is wonderful. we are very close, and spend a lot of time together. i love being around him because we both feel the same way about all the important things.

i dont force him to come to my family events, he doesnt force me to go to his. we have some friends we do dinner with once a month, but other than that, its just us, we both work from home. i love spending time with him, and i love doing my own thing. we both allow the other room to do what we want.

its life changing when you find that perfect person for you. and you'll find you dont mind not being alone.

myofibril

Because your mental fitness is just as important as your six pack abs.

I whole heartedly agree. People won't blink twice if you say it's a good idea to train the body to fight disease, infection or attack but if you ask them to train their mind to do so they look at you like your craaaazy.

Clearly there are many causes for depression, including loneliness, but certainly your analysis of losing social validation as one cause seems legitimate. Whilst we can try to outrun our animal nature at our core we are pack animals and need social cues to establish where we sit within the hierarchy. Without it unease can become rooted. I do believe that with a conscious approach you can break those chains but I don't think many people want to make that kind of investment in time, effort and research needed. It seems that thinking philosophically has been sacrificed on the altar of consumerism to fill the void.

Most people are content to watch the shadows flicker on the walls of the cave.

UsedToBeHusky

It seems that thinking philosophically has been sacrificed on the altar of consumerism to fill the void.

Most people are content to watch the shadows flicker on the walls of the cave.

shine_

I haven't ever lived alone, but I can imagine that I'd be quite happy doing so if it came to it. I'd probably want a goldfish or a cat or something to chat with (haha) but right now the thought of not having flatmates is a tempting one! Might not be so much fun in the long run though. What does get to me though is having family and friends so far away. I have really felt the distance lately, and I'm missing those spontaneous get togethers that you can have when you live close to your friends/family. I think I'd be fine living on my own as long as I knew I still had a tight knit group of people around me that I cared about and cared about me too. That if anything is what I miss which gets me down.