90lbs down - When will I FEEL the dfference?????

sars_68

I know I've lost loads and I know I look much slimmer than I did. I've gone from UK size 22 to size 12 clothes. My family, friends and colleagues have all commented on how well I've done and how good I look. I can see the difference, but I can't FEEl it! I still feel fat and frumpy.

I'm not looking for compliments and feel a bit silly for posting this - I know I should be able to see what I've achieved. I'm just wondering if anyone in a similar situation has been through the same or if anyone can give me some advice? When will I actually FEEL and think thinner?

omma_to_3

Unfortunately, no one can really tell you that. For me, it really was when I could shop in the normal section instead of the plus size section. And when I start feeling like I haven't accomplished much, I start looking at side by side comparison photos to remind myself how far I've come. And try not to focus on how far I still have to go.

sars_68

Unfortunately, no one can really tell you that. For me, it really was when I could shop in the normal section instead of the plus size section. And when I start feeling like I haven't accomplished much, I start looking at side by side comparison photos to remind myself how far I've come. And try not to focus on how far I still have to go.

Thank you, and well done on your weight loss - you're doing really well! :flowerforyou:

bayles1

You are neither fat or frumpy. You have achieved major success during the time that you have set about losing that 90 pounds. You are receiving compliments from friends and family and quite rightly so. You should IMO,continue to receive these compliments because you are still achieving major things,most notably,you are turning back time. You are wearing clothes that are making you feel good,your confidence has soared and along the way,you have given so much support to others. Take a real good look in the mirror,it's time to start seeing what others see and start liking what you see. You are an absolute 100% diamond.

sars_68

You are neither fat or frumpy. You have achieved major success during the time that you have set about losing that 90 pounds. You are receiving compliments from friends and family and quite rightly so. You should IMO,continue to receive these compliments because you are still achieving major things,most notably,you are turning back time. You are wearing clothes that are making you feel good,your confidence has soared and along the way,you have given so much support to others. Take a real good look in the mirror,it's time to start seeing what others see and start liking what you see. You are an absolute 100% diamond.

Thank you so much for your lovely comments. Tomorrow morning I will get that mirror out and look deeply!! Thank you for your continued support. xx

CharlieJuliette

I know exactly what you mean. It'll take time to adjust. And until you do, every time you catch yourself in the mirror you'll get a lovely surprise because you won't be expecting to see a slim person there!

monikah1234

I'd kill for your body. You look awesome.

2 things that may help. Exercise++. Buy new clothes-treat yourself!

Swanson83

I too am feeling the same way. I haven't lost a lot of weight, I didn't really have a lot to lose. I had though become very soft. I have had three children and I was eating like my kids did,so I I was barely fitting into the largest size pants I had ever been in. Now I am slowly getting rid of the softness and increasing muscle. I am guessing once my body fat % is lower I will feel better. I know that the number on the scale is not my goal. I am at the smallest size I have been including while in high school and I am 10 pounds heavier than I was at that point. I would recommend if you can start weight training. It has helped me slowly start feeling better about how I look in the mirror.
Hope that helps.

lizard053

When YOU decide that you can. This really is a mental image thing. Only you can decide when you will feel the difference.

OliveJuice1984

I haven't lost nearly as much as you (17lbs so far). I don't see a difference in me or feel a difference but I have to keep telling myself that I've lost 17 LBS!! I've lost the equivilant of a 7 month old child! That's a big accomplishment. I just have to focus on the facts rather than my feelings. I think that if I focus on those things sooner or later my feelings will catch up. Congrats on your weight loss!

sars_68

Thanks everyone for your support, tips and comments.

You're all fab! Keep up the good work.

Sarah x

psuLemon

Stop worrying about weight and start working on fitness itself and you will feel it. I know I have and others i have worked with.

MrsM1ggins

If you still have any spend 20 minutes dressing in your 90lbs heavier clothes. I did that a while ago and putting both legs down one trouser leg was really helpful in helping my brain to catch up.

Congrats on the loss BTW. :flowerforyou:

GemmaRowlands

I'm in exactly the same position as you. I know I've done amazingly well, but I also struggle to feel the difference. I wore a size 12 dress today and STILL felt fat, even though when I started I would have had to get a size 20.

taunto

Happiness from your own body will lie in small steps. Like wearing those old clothes, or being able to use a belt again, or be able to get to your apartment upstairs without being out of breath (all of these happened to me). You look amazing and you should be feeling proud with your accomplishement.

jirette

The thing with the picture is true... put it somewhere you can see it all the time.. After 7 months and 2 days I finally got rid of all my baby weight... I felt awesome when I finally could see myself in my old jeans and mini skirts... I look at my before and after pics and just feel great!!! So far, 17 pounds less and I'm looking to loose at least 32 more!!! I'm very motivated!!!!

knittnponder

I'm learning that I have to stop the negative self talk before I can expect to "feel" any different. Constantly calling myself fat and ugly doesn't help me feel thinner or beautiful no matter how many compliments I get from others.

SPNLuver83

That's nearly impossible to answer. After years of being heavy your brain just gets used to seeing yourself that way.... I've lost almost 50 lbs, I'm a size 6/7, but I still look in the mirror and feel fat and frumpy. I'm hoping once I reach my goal I'll be able to see the person my husband says he sees.

genablue

I have a friend who lost 230 lbs. She looked fabulous and gained some confidence but still felt like her old self. She would shy away from doing things that she wasn't able to before and would catch herself buying clothes that didn't really fit her or compliment her. She still felt fat in her mind. 4 years later and she is finally getting used to the idea that she is no longer that person but she still struggles, if you look at her you would never even know she had a weight problem. Our minds do some awful things to us. You look absolutely fabulous and what a motivation for us all with your weight loss!

Elizabeth_C34

I have gone from a US size 18W to a size 12, and I still don't "feel" thinner. I do, however, take a lot more pride in how I look every day, which helps. I bought clothes that fit nicely, hang nicely, pants that fit properly, colors and cuts of tops that flatter me well, and I wear jewelry (necklace, rings, earrings, bracelets) and a matching handbag or wristlet every day. I never used to do that stuff, but I like that I do it now. It makes me feel more like I am proud of my new body even if I don't really "feel" it (if that makes any sense).

pinkita

Do you mean you still feel frumpy physically or just mentally? If it's physically, check your sodium intake. I didn't start to feel thinner until I reduced mine (I try to keep it less than 1800mg).

sars_68

Do you mean you still feel frumpy physically or just mentally? If it's physically, check your sodium intake. I didn't start to feel thinner until I reduced mine (I try to keep it less than 1800mg).

Bit of both really - but I will take on board your advice. I think I do tend to have a bit too much salt at times.

Thanks

onmywaytoskinny155

I still go to the plus section first before I go to the smaller section.

frosty73

i know you aren't fishing for compliments, but I have to say..... WAY TO GO!

For me, I lost weight a long time ago but didn't really "feel" any different. I guess I was expecting the heavens to open and a parade of unicorns to shower rainbows and butterflies on me. It didn't happen.... and I gained the weight back over a period of time.

THIS time, I am making sure to log and keep track of how hard I work, so I have proof that *I deserve this*. I worked hard for it. Never, ever forget how hard it was and how far you've come. Take a moment to smile at yourself in the mirror every day and say, "Well done, you!" Take ownership of your new body, love it, and feed it well.

Long live the skinny woman! :happy:

j77r68

i assume you were larger for many years like most of us and the self esteem and body image issues started way back then or
probably even earlier. it's going to take quite a bit of doing positive affirmations with yourself.(drilling positive images into your head) talking with a counsellor to uproot issues to see what else may be blocking total success.
Congrats on your success thus far and good luck at repairing yourself inside

krisrpaz

Try doing like the Biggest Loser and put the weight back on in the form of weights strapped to various parts of your body. It doesn't even have to be 90 pounds. I lifed a 40 bag of salt the other day and couldn't believe I used to carry almost twice that much. How did my poor body handle it? It didn't!! It kind of helps you realize how far you've come and how thankful your body and joints are to you. Of course my naturally negative mind thinks "Now if I could just lose ONE more of you..." but I'm still working on that negative mindset ;-) My mind and body are a constant work in progress.

escloflowneCHANGED

This is what made me feel it (Still think I look terrible and avoid mirrors). I played a sport(paintball) that I hadn't played since I lost the weight...It was night and day. I was running around and felt faster, stronger and overall better, that's when I felt the change and it only pushed me harder. Do you have any sports or physical activities that you loved before the weight loss that you haven't done since? If so, go try it and you will be surprised!

kidskart

I feel that way at times. I know I've lost weight, but still feel like the fattest person in the room.

Yesterday was the first day I had gone to looke for new jeans, I tried on a 22, then a 20, next an 18, then a 16, finally a 14 fit! A 14 from the Jr. section not the Plus section. That was a real motivator!

krisrpaz

i know you aren't fishing for compliments, but I have to say..... WAY TO GO!

For me, I lost weight a long time ago but didn't really "feel" any different. I guess I was expecting the heavens to open and a parade of unicorns to shower rainbows and butterflies on me. It didn't happen.... and I gained the weight back over a period of time.

THIS time, I am making sure to log and keep track of how hard I work, so I have proof that *I deserve this*. I worked hard for it. Never, ever forget how hard it was and how far you've come. Take a moment to smile at yourself in the mirror every day and say, "Well done, you!" Take ownership of your new body, love it, and feed it well.

Long live the skinny woman! :happy:

This is one of the BEST posts I have ever read on MFP. First of all, it almost made me spit my coffee out from laughing at the "expecting the heavens to open and a parade of unicorns to shower rainbows and butterflies on me" part. But the second paragraph is gold. :-) It is so easy to forget to do this.

PaveGurl

You've been heavier longer than you've been "small" - of course it's going to take time to re-envision yourself!

You have made amazing strides and incredible progress - and you may not FEEL thin, but it's important at this stage to realise you are still seeing your "old" self in your mind's eye, and give yourself kudos at the smaller size. For me, realising that my mental picture of myself isn't accurate was a HUGE thing.

My breakthrough came when I was with my partner somewhere, and he pointed out a woman with a body I envied. I got upset! I was SO MAD - and he was confused! I cried "why would you point out a girl like that when I look like THIS?!"

And that's when he said that she and I had the same sort of body! I was completely flummoxed, so he asked me to point out what I thought I looked like - and then it was his turn to be bewildered, because it was completely not how he (and, it turned out, others) sees me.

Perhaps something like that might be helpful - find someone you trust implicitly to help you get a visual on where you were when you began - and where you are now? That was such an eye-opening experience for me, I can't even tell you.

mariannelyman

Congratulations on your weight loss!! I've lost 96 pounds from gastric bypass, but after 11 months the weight is coming off slowly. I think this website is great motivation! The food diary is really great, too. I feel so much more energenic since the weight has come off. I wish I knew how to post pictures in this post so you could see my before and after photos.