Need some advice, please!

KelseyPalmtree

Okay, so for the last couple months (probably more, but I've only noticed lately) I've been finding that my food has been going missing. I live with three roommates, who are all part of my volleyball team, and they often leave the front door unlocked. Even when that's not unlocked, the side door is, because one of them lost her keys, and won't pay the $5 for a new one (I'll come back to why this is important).

I've been leaving notes on the cupboards and shelves with my food on them, asking whoever it is to stop stealing the food. Normally, I would confront the culprit, but I don't know for sure who is doing it.

Today, one of my roommates started complaining about the notes, and told me that she and the other two girls have had discussions about it (great to know they're talking about me behind my back). They say that they're offended by the notes because they feel like I'm accusing them. Since I don't know which one of them it is, or which other teammate from another apartment is coming in and stealing food, I can't just address who's doing it, because no one will copt to it.

So, any suggestions on how I should handle this?

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Youve received some great advice here, but its obvious to me that you have to put your foot down. They came up to you and confronted you about the notes... you put your foot down as well and say "well, one of you or all of you feel the need to take my food without asking and you certainly havent been replacing it OR asking first."...

Make the effort, get a securable unit to put your food-items in and lock it up.

And.. moving forward. Dont ever offer them help with anything. Clearly they are helping THEIRSELVES to your food supply, I think you have already done your community service to their selfish needs.

Personally, I dont *****foot around when it comes to the bottom line. Ill walk up the alley of cubicles and Ive heard people talking about me. I go straight to the person I heard (and Im REALLY good at picking out voices) and remind them "If you feel the compulsion to talk about me behind my back, we can easily address your kindergarten concerns in the way you are dealing with it right now... Or, you can actually prove to me youre a real adult and can shut your mouth, stop talking about me behind my back to others and address me appropriately, otherwise, shut your mouth right now before I report you for harassment. Mind you, the managers hear me and sit back and laugh because they know I wont put up with that garbage.

I decided to put anything that they would steal in my room. I cleaned out a bunch of book shelf space and moved it all. One of the girls was giving me snarky looks the whole time. If she says anything, i'm going to verbally slap her lol.

Unless I have proof, I usually don't confront them, but enough is enough. I'm tired of them being b****es and taking advantage of me, and the fact that I'm a nice person and help them out when they need it. I've told them so many times that i've lost count, that if they are that hungry, to just ASK me if they can have some.

But yeah, they're not getting any help anymore. They can call me a b**** if they want, but I'm tired of being nice to people that aren't nice back. I'm done with it. They're not worth my time.

Thanks for the pep talk

AReasor

I have been in roommate hell before and man, it can get emotionally consuming. Honestly, the notes aren't doing anything helpful. They know you are mad and they don't care. Just keep your things in your room or car. Graduating college is huge. Give that the attention it deserves and hopefully you won't ever have to see those two wenches again, ever.

SammyPacks

I had issues with one of my roommates stealing my ****ing food (excuse the language but I HATED it)... seriously she didn't buy her own food ever she always mooched off of me and the other two girls. If I were you I'd leave some foods in the trunk of your car (that way it won't cause issues and they won't know the food exists). Other than that... I'd start putting food in your own thing (like your own bins or fridge... but I know that'll only cause more tension in the household)

meghan1789

Been there, done that. It sucks.

I suggest calling a house meeting. Post-it notes are not fun for anyone to come across. You need to address them in person, let them know you are serious. Even if they don't cop to it, maybe they'll at least stop doing it.

Otherwise, get a black sharpie and starting writing your name on everything. I'd also mark the level of fullness on things like milk jugs or cereal boxes. It's sneaky and not nice, but they should take notice.